We need a DopeFest Purity Test

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I have an idea, but I need help. We need to develop a DopeFest purity test. For those unfamiliar with purity tests in general, go here.

For example, some questions for the DopeFest Purity Test could be[ul]
[li]Have you ever gone to a Dopefest?[/li][li]More than 5?[/li][li]More than 10?[/li][li]Have you travelled more than 100 miles for a Dopefest?[/li][li]Have you gotten drunk at a Dopefest?[/li][li]Have you passed out at a Dopefest?[/li][li]Have you gotten laid at a Dopefest?[/li][li]More than once?[/li][li]By more than one person?[/li][li]At the same time?[/ul][/li]Please, I need more. Add your own, and maybe someone more web-savy than me can actually put the test up on a site somewhere.

2

Have you ever gotten so drunk at a dopefest that you’ve thrown up?

  • On purpose?
  • On someone else?
  • On someone else on purpose?
3

Have you done something to start an in-joke at a dopefest?

Have you hosted a dopefest? At your house?

Have you gone to a dopefest that was organized less than 24 hours before it happened?

4

A suggestion, porcupine?

Please, please, please…don’t ever use the words “DopeFest” and “purity” in the same sentence. My eyeballs melted after I read that, and now it’s really hard to see to type.

Thanks! :smiley:

5

Ever eaten more than one Scotch Egg at a Dope Fest?

6

We had a vastly outdated (and currently nonfunctional) one on the teemingmillions homepage. If you come up with new questions, I’ll assemble a new test :slight_smile:

快三平台注册送18-电子平台送免费体验金 (don’t try to take it, the script is broken at the moment)

7

UDD has agreed to write a new scoring script that will not only calculate your percentage but also offer to keep a record of it (or not, your choice) by having you put in your screenname and click a button.

He just went downstairs to write it :slight_smile:

8

Wouldn’t it be more of an “anti-purity test” or “impurity test”? It seems wrong somehow to call it a purity test.

I mean I wouldn’t feel bad about passing an impurity test, but I wouldn’t want anyone on the board knowing I passed a purity test.

9

Traditionally these things are called purity tests, even though they’re testing how dirty you are. I think we should stick with the traditional term. :wink:

Opal, thanks much for the offer to update the existing one - I had no idea that such a thing existed.

Some more ideas:
[li]Did you bring a non-doper friend?[/li][li]Did you regret it later?[/li][li]Did you reveal cleavage or ass?[/li][li]Did you reveal package or hooha?[/li][li]Was there groping?[/li][li]Are there pictures of it on the internet?[/li][*]Did you brandish a sex toy?

10

Not surprising, I unlinked it a while back because it was so outdated. SInce then, server upgrades have rendered the old script useless, too. The new script will be far superior :slight_smile:

11

How about:

[list]
[li]Did you ever crash at another Doper’s house after a Dopefest?[/li][li]Had you never met that person?[/li][li]Have you invited Dopers to crash at your place?[/li][li]More than five?[/li][li]More than ten?[/li][li]Did anything other than crashing happen?[/li][li]Have you ever danced on a bar at a Dopefest?[/li][li]Did you remove clothing whilst dancing?[/li]
I am so screwed. :smiley:

12

[]Have you kissed a Doper at a Fest?[]Have you kissed a Doper at some other time?[]Have you kissed more than one Doper at the same Fest?[]Have you kissed a Doper of the same sex (or opposite sex, if you’re homosexual) at a Fest?[]Have you set yourself (or anyone else) on fire at a Fest?[]Have you ever flown to a Fest?Have you ever bought an outfit or costume specifically for a Fest?

13
  • are you thinksnow?
14

Functional Prototype:

http://www.teemingmillions.com/dopefest-purity.html

The actual test will be much fancier looking, especially the scoring page. We will also have a form that you can use to post your results on a list.

15

Hm, I’m at 2% right now. (Shouldn’t the scoring be the other way? I’m a veritable Dopefest virgin- so, 98% pure, I’d think.)

Going on some reasonable expectations of this weekend, I think I’ll be at 32% as currently scored, or 68% in traditional scoring.

Good times. :smiley:

16

for the heck of it I put the new script into the old test, if you’re interested in trying that one out :slight_smile:

17

Woo hoo! 5% Impure.

Have you ever done something with a cow at a dopefest?

18

Hmmm, only 27%. I thought I’d be higher. On the other hand, when I flashed Ayesha last year, I didn’t know I’d be getting future points for it. I just did it for the sake of Art.

My suggested questions (some being self-serving)

Have you ever worn hooch boots to a dopefest?

Have you ever crashed another doper’s workplace during a dopefest?

Have you ever been at a dopefest that lasted more than six hours? Eight? Ten? Twelve?

Have you ever been at a dopefest that visited more than two bars? Three? Four?

Have you been to dopefests in more than one country? Two? Three?

Have you ever bought alcoholic drinks for an underage doper?

If you are an underage doper, have you drank alcohol at a dopefest?

Have you ever invited anyone to a dopefest as a date? A first date?

Have you ever entered a restroom intended for the opposite sex at a dopefest?

Have you ever been in a gunfight at a dopefest?

Have you ever sang kareoke at a dopefest?

Have you ever commited a major felony at a dopefest?

Have you ever been questioned by the police during a dopefest?

Have you ever been asked to leave any business establishment during a dopefest?

Have you ever gone to a dopefest without wearing underwear?

Have you ever left a dopefest without wearing underwear?

19

44%

Is that good or bad?
[list] []Have you ever been licked at a DopeFest? []Have you ever licked someone at a Dopefest? []Have you ever missed work because you were still drunk more than 24 hours after a DopeFest? []Has management ever put up the chairs around you while you were still DopeFesting?

20

39%

I’m going to work on that. Gotta get to more 'Fests.