I wonder if the couples who do this, think:
10% of our invitees will think this is tacky. 90% will get the message and they’ll surely make it a monetary gift.
And, most likely, the 10%, while privately thinking it tacky, won’t tell us and still give us a money gift.
I don’t know, HubZilla - we didn’t ask for cash gifts for our wedding, but we received a lot of cash any way, and I felt it wasn’t right to use that cash for things other than gifts for ourselves (as opposed to paying bills with it). Of course we could have used the cash any way we wanted, but we wanted to stay true to the intention of the givers. Of course, Jim and I aren’t the kind of people who would tell other people specifically what to give us. I think people who would ask for cash don’t care what their invitees think of it.
Anyone who refuses to come to my wedding as a result of the registry card in the invitation is welcome to stay at home and pound the stick up their ass to splinters.
Actually, no it applies pretty much everywhere. It’s generally rude to say “Gimme money. Gimme gimme gimme!!”
It’s just at weddings that some people tend to forget that.
True. For some reason, weddings are the one event where adults seem to think they are entitled to gifts. In my earlier, post, I think I said one is supposed to ACT as though they don’t expect gifts. In fact, what I should have said is that one is not supposed to expect gifts at all. If people give them, that’s wonderful. If they don’t, that’s fine, too. The point, as people said earlier in the thread, is that the joy of a wedding is an occasion that you want to share with your friends…it is not the joy of anticipating a bunch of cash and other fabulous prizes.
See, that’s the thing about civilization. Not everyone participates.
This is really an excellent point, which I’ve used in similar discussions with family/friends/co-workers.
I know someone who’s getting married next year. Her and her fiance are both over thirty, and they have all the household “gear” they need. She wasn’t sure if she should request cash gifts, or maybe register somewhere that had things they wouldn’t mind getting (more and more stores having registries these days, even stores you wouldn’t expect to).
I said that, if I were in their place, I wouldn’t request cash in the invitation, although I might suggest it to anyone who specifically phones and asks. I also suggested that some travel agencies have registries, so you can “register” your honeymoon.
I think this is a good idea if you’d like cash for some reason, even it’s for a house down-payment or something else, if you’re planning on taking a honeymoon. Any money people give to the trip registry is money the couple won’t have to spend specifically on that, and the couple can direct their own money toward other purchases/savings.
Yeah, I can see that. But cutesy, smarmy rhyming requests in the invitation are tacky nevertheless.