In a dream last night I was playing a game, and one requirement is that you only have sex with one partner during the game. So it included a device – something like an inverted chastity belt. The little cutting teeth allow for insertion easily enough, but let’s just say there is a severe penalty for early withdrawl.
When I woke up and thought about it, I decided to call it the Monogamy Belt. But posh name or not, it’s a terrible idea.
No weird inventions in my dreams. Weird-ass businesses, though. Week before last I had a dream that involved me and one of my cousins being in a combination pub/yarn store. (No, they wouldn’t let you bring your beer and snacks while you fondled the yarn or test drove the spinning wheels.)
I think I might have posted about this before, but whatever. I once had a dream that I kept Thomas Jefferson in a small cage in my basement. In my dream he was actually a midget. He taught me how to make a suitcase out of frozen waffles. It worked really well, until I woke up. Even then, for a few brief shining moments I was convinced I had the greatest invention ever.
Turns out he wasn’t a midget, and frozen waffles have no structural integrity once thawed. Bummer.
Many years ago, I dreamed I invented a hammer that worked by sound, you just touched it to the nail etc. and the sound drove the nail!
Permanent Kittens! We were gonna be RICH!
Last night I had another bizarre dream involving someone else’s invention – some kind of North Korean super duper cookie. NK and Japan went to war (SK seemed to be entirely out of the picture!) and I was running Japan’s air defenses. I vectored fighter planes to intercept NK attackers, but I had to have the pilots verify they weren’t shooting down any of the planes that were smuggling the cookies out of the country. Those, we escorted to a secret landing strip so we could offload the cookies and send them back for more.
Must have been great cookies!
In one of my long, convoluted, highly-detailed dreams, I was wearing a watch of my own design, which consisted of a flat, thin piece of polished agate or geode worn lengthwise on the wrist. The clock mechanism was a bar of light inside it which v e r y s l o w l y moved across the watch with the time of day. Kept Military time, too.
In the dream, some awful nosey woman was trying to get me to explain how I’d managed to
come up with it, and she invited me to sit down and tell her about it by kindly calling me “less talented”, as though it were a shame that I wouldn’t really be able to advance the technology because I was not smart enough. I was insulted but sat down to the
interview anyway.
I frequently dream about theme parks, and see or experience some very impractical-to-build-in-real-life rides.
Often there’s a component in which whatever you’re sitting or standing in takes you both indoors and outdoors. Sometimes they’re more roller-coaster-ish, with riders being rushed past letters that add up to words that add up to secret messages.
It’s all very entertaining! 
This sounds really cool. If it was comfortable to wear and I could afford it, I’d buy it.
I might have posted this at one point. My dreams are weird, but I don’t usually invent things. I had a few linked dreams at one point that involved using a metal garbage can of the type in the link to a Home Depot page. When I pulled on both handles, I flew upwards, then I used varying pressure and twists to the handles in order to navigate. In order to land, simple: just push down on the handles.
The last dream I had involving my garbage vehicle involved avoiding all kinds of objets, animals, people, fire, lightning, howling winds in a huge storm, in order to stay on top of the clouds. I guessed that the Apocalypse was happening and I could survive it if I stayed in the clouds and avoided flying debris. I woke up before knowing whether my plan had worked or not.
http://www.homedepot.com/p/Behrens-31-gal-Steel-Trash-Can-1270
/100202118#.UcteDNjJKFY as a flying machine.
I invented a game in a dream once, and then played it in real life with some friends. It’s kind of fun. Here’s it works:
(1) Get 6 or so people
(2) Pick a word to start with. Say, “Dinosaur”
(3) Each person comes up with a word that they think would pair with dinosaur, like “Extinct” or “tyrannosaurus”
(4) For each word that is come up with, google that word along with dinosaur, so google “dinosaur extinct” and “Dinosaur tyrannosaurus”, etc.
(5) Note how many results are returned for each search
(6) Whoever comes up with the most results wins that round and gets one point. Then whatever their word was is the new starting word, except that all other words mentioned so far this game are now off limits. So if “extinct” were the new word, then “dinosaur” and “tyrannosaurus” would be off limits, and you might go to “animal” or “plant” or “Dodo” or whatever.
(If you’re actually going to play the game, you need some additional rules, like banning pronouns and articles and prepositions, etc.)
The funny thing about the dream was that in the dream I remember thinking “holy crap, what a great idea, I’m going to make a fortune!”, then I woke up and was like “well, it’s kind of a neat idea, but certainly not going to make anyone any money at all”.
My universal word choice for anything at all would be “sex”, and I would win about 90% of the time. 
What I find really weird is that last November, we played that game at my 6-year-old step-granddaughter’s birthday dinner. I’ll ask her parents what the game was called, because I’ve forgotten it. BTW, though it was a child’s birthday dinner, said dinner was for adult family members. The birthday party was the previous day, with children as guests.
You may have just been joking, but “dinosaur sex” gets 22 million results, 10 times as many as “dinosaur extinct”.
What an age we live in.
Edited to add: “dinosaur movie” gets 35 million…
It was really cool. You’ll probably wind up buying it from someone else since I’m not smart enough to advance the technology. 
This sounds like it would be much safer than my dream flying machine: a cutting board that I sit on, holding both sides. It only flies as long as I am holding a special penny between my two big toes. Dangerous!