What are the clues a person is probably a good lover?

I think getting an aswer to this question might save everybody some time. Just the other day I was thinking about all the women I’ve ever dated, and realized I enjoyed being with the two who were bisexual the most.
The reason for this, I think, is because they were the most experienced and relaxed about sex in general. They were openminded, willing to try most things, and generous in bed.
But can these traits be applied to other bisexual women, or was I just lucky? I’m interested in hearing answers to this from both women and men, from any perspective.

Goat meat on the chin.

I agree… bisexual girls are better in bed.

Even if you don’t pull off the threesome, in fact…

I’m not bisexual and I’m excellent in bed–if I do say so myself. :smiley:

I think personality tells a lot. The best lovers I’ve had have been kind, considerate men who listen when I talk. That tells me that they probably care about pleasing me. I’ve also been with cocky, sexy-looking men who didn’t do a thing right in bed. They were so concerned about their own pleasure that I never got mine.

It is all about the kiss. After much field research, I have found that the way a person kisses directly correlates to what kind of lover they are. Rushed? Methodical? Passionate? Clueless? (Unfortunately, too many in that category) Thorough? A combination of the above…mmm…toe curling. Made it very easy to decide, early on, just how far things would be going with that person.

What she said.

Straight male here - IMHO, generosity is the best indicator. Is this women, in general, a generous person, or selfish?

The selfish make bad lovers - they expect you to provide them with pleasure, and don’t care to reciprocate. To be fair, the women I have been with have generally been of the opinion that men are more likely to be selfish in this way than women - but I have known selfish women, too; I think its a wash.

Everything else can either be learned or is a function of attraction. But if someone is selfish, that is just the way they are and there is no changing it.

In speaking with my friends about this (both male and female), we all agree that the better a person is at dancing the better they are in bed.

It’s the twinkle in the eye that gives them away :wink:

There is no such thing as a person who is a good kisser, but a bad lover.

Especially if he runs his fingers through your hair and kind of massages the back of your head during the kiss pant

Sure there is! Just like there are instances of really bad dancers who are awesome in bed. I also slept with a guy who was both a really good dancer and a really good kisser, but was a total disappointment in the bedroom.

I agree with the kissing and the dancing…to a point, I’ve known some ok kissers who were great in bed
I also agree with the Bi-sexual part…even more. The best partners were ALWAYS bi…less inhibited, more comfortable than straight women…
I also think alot depends on your own attitude…just my cents

His name is js_africanus and he lives in rural Michigan.

Too obvious? My apologies.
Girls who smoke are dirtier. I’ve heard this anecdotially. Also, a social psych. prof I once had told us about taking the data of two surveys and combining them. Apparently there is a way to do this so that ordinal rankings of preferences from two surveys can be put together without losing validity. I have no idea how to do it. Anyway, people who smoke are more adventurous in bed, according to his results.

Based on a limited sample set, I have found that women who enjoy food, who appreciate flavors & textures, are very “promising”.

Conversely, I would be more weary of “frustrated salad pickers”.

To tell if a guy is a good lover, check his sig. If it’s both suggestive and self-promotional, odds are he’s smokin’ hot in the bedroom.

For women, in my (limited) experience, the best indicator is self-confidence. Insecure women, no matter how physically attractive, are generally bad lovers. Women who are comfortable with how they look tend to be the most fun in the sack.

People who are fun and giving tend to be fun and giving in most aspects of their life. A large portion of any sexual attraction I’ve had for a woman is her spirit, a certain playfulness that suggests any number of wonderful things.

You misspelled “Cervaise” and “Seattle.”
Too obvious? My apologies.
Nope, just needed to clear up a couple of typos. :smiley:

Now, now, you guys; the best sign is if he’s six inches long and furry with a long snout and bristly tail.

The best indicator I’ve ever found is a sense of humor. I think a sense of humor is essential to good sexual function. BTW, hubby has a good sense of humor, is a dreadful dancer, but great in bed! (Of course, he’s had some training. . . :wink: ).

Hey js_africanus how you doin’? :wink:

I sorta agree about the smoking correlation, if nothing else it indicates an oral fixation, eh?

Why would anyone really want a secret code telling them if someone’s a good lover or not, anyway? For one thing, toe-curling fabulous for me might be skeevy and weird for you, and I’d prefer the fun of discovery rather than trying to sneakily analyze clues beforehand.