It proves that your friend’s uncle is crazy. Her cite proves that she’s one up on you citewise. Where’s your cite that her food issue is psychological?
And you comprehend this: they complied with the request, because it was an easy one for a (wait for it) Asian restaurant to meet. She did not pull out a gun and threaten to shoot the waiter in the nuts unless he supplied the tofu. SHe made a request; they honored it. That’s exactly how all ordering from a menu works.
Daniel
That said, here’s an interesting cite suggesting that meat won’t be responsible for such a reaction:
Daniel
exactly. She didn’t say “Oh- I asked for no garlic bread and garlic bread makes me break out in hives!” She rolled her eyes like I was the stupidest person on the planet and did the passive aggressive announce to the room “Oh, and she BROUGHT IT ANYWAY!!!1111ELEVENTY” I mean come on, I’m a person. I don’t need to be talked to like that or treated that way.
She had the urge to treat someone badly that day. I guess my horrible sin of bringing her bread was reason enough to bring out her inner bitch. And if I can re-iterate, this was VOLUNTEER work cooking, serving and cleaning up at a local club (think VFW). While I do my absolute best to make it a pleasure to have dinner there, it’s not a 5 star restaurant. It’s a $5/place spaghetti dinner. Talk about needing a dose of perspective.
Oh, and my big restaurant complaint, btw, is when the server brings the check, clears all of the plates and starts offering me a box while I’m still eating. I’m a slow eater and always last to finish, but I don’t appreciate getting the bums rush out of a restaurant. Let me finish!!!
As a lifelong vegetarian from a family of lifelong vegetarians, I have had experiences which lead me to believe meat does make me sick, even when I am unaware of it. But I think the business about Ferret’s uncle’s cite is really a red herring anyway. Even if I have no further reason for a request than my own idiosyncratic desires, it’s perfectly acceptable to ask, just in case. It could turn out that the restaurant is willing to accommodate, and then we both end up happy. Except Carol Steam, off in the corner stewing, displeased, for some reason, that people could come to a novel agreement.
Because the dish was offered with a choice of two meats, it implies that 1) the restaurant is not serving frozen, pre-packaged entrees so substitutions are less of a problem and 2) the meat is not an integral part of the dish (like beef-stuffed ravioli, for instance, since you can choose. I think that requesting neither of the two meat choices actually makes less work for the kitchen staff, since they only have to prepare the rice or noodles and sauce. However, the server offered and the kitchen had no problem with substituting (apparently very-well prepared) tofu. By doing so, I’m sure the server earned a good tip and the restaurant ensured repeat business.
I don’t really see how that’s “imposing” her will on the restaurant anymore than saying “I am allergic to/don’t like/am vegetarian/keep kosher, could you please remove the tomatoes/onions/meat/pork from my entree.”
Are you honestly saying that people with special dietary needs or requests should never eat at a restaurant under any circumstances? Sure, if you’re allergic to shellfish and you go to a seafood restaurant, you’re probably an idiot. But if you’re vegetarian and go to an Asian place, requesting no meat or substituting tofu doesn’t make you an asshole.
Even Burger King offers food “your way.” Can’t a sit-down restaurant do the same?
Dear chain restaurant: stop pushing all the owner operated places that actually serve food that isn’t bland and unoriginal out of business with your purchasing power and thus slightly cheaper prices. Also, pay your staff properly and stop treating them as replaceable and irrelevant.
Disclaimer: I have never worked food service
“Bottomless” salad and bread sticks that ain’t . . . I’m looking at you, Olive Garden! I don’t need 13,000 bread sticks, but I’m not delighted about paying $8.50 for lettuce and two bread sticks because the server never returned.
And loud music! What the Hell? I’ve been in some chains where the music (muzak) is so loud that I can’t hear my dinner companion.
Did you read the part about “long time vegetarian”?
I may be out of line here, if so I do apologize.
But, in the 24-hour coffe shop I worked in (I specify that so you won’t think I am speaking of higher-end restaurants), the food was cooked in the order in which it was received.
The worst thing you could do, is for a waiter/waitress to go from one table to the next, taking orders one after the other and then popping them up all at once to the cooks.
Some dumb-ass throws up 3 orders simultaneously, you freaking COOKED them all simultaneously, and popped the plated dinners up one after the other. If there was no pause between them, they went out all at the same time–sign of a really good cook. How is the waiter/waittress gona serve 3 meals simultaneously? Heck, I dunno, but when I tried to explain that there is no spooky action at a distance to them, their eyes glazed over. At which point, I just reiterated the same theme to them: Your orders get plated in the same sequence you put them up, you dumb shit!!! You don’t want 76 orders up at once, don’t put them all up at once. Jeez.
If you wanted them spaced out, say 3-4 minutes, you freaking put the orders in 3-4 minutes apart.
Sign, in that world, of a really, really, bad waiter or waittress. The really good cooks produced the orders in the order they were received, AND IN THE SPACING they were received.
(Some of you may have different experience with Sambo’s, but that, alas, is an indication of what ultimately led to its demise a year and a half after I joined them)
Missed the edit window:
If for some reason the restaurant is unable to comply with a polite request for no onions or no cheese or whatever for some reason or other, the patron has the choice of taking it as offered, ordering something else, or taking her business elsewhere. As long as the patron doesn’t throw a hissy fit, there’s no problem.
And I’m not a picky eater, nor a vegetarian, nor do I only eat kosher foods. I don’t think I’ve ever sent back food, complained about food, or requested any special substitutions. I’ve actually eaten the completely wrong entree before because I didn’t really care and didn’t want to make a fuss and have to wait. But I know some people that have allergies or are vegetarians or just don’t like certain foods, and it would really suck for them if restaurants were unwilling to make reasonable accomodations for them. Not to mention, I doubt those restaurants would be in business much longer.
This particular post isn’t about allergies. It’s about abstaining from a food for a long time, and whether it suddenly causes you to become physically (as opposed to psychosomatically) sick.
I’m a little skeptical about it myself. It sounds a lot like the argument militant vegans use, telling everyone that humans aren’t physically made to eat meat. I have to wonder if the posters who mention this believe that too.
So… Garlic BREAD and whole-grain loaves of BREAD are actually NOT… bread? 
(Again, I’ve never worked in food service.)
I’m sure all of that is true. Appetizers and meals at the same time may very well be a screw up by the waitstaff. However, the point remains that it is not a function of someone else bringing your meal. It’s a separate issue, which was my point.
No it’s not. Ordering off the menu involves ordering stuff that’s actually ON the menu. Tofu wasn’t.
Why is it so important to you that a restaurant not be permitted to voluntarily make accommodations beyond what is strictly printed on the menu? If they don’t want to, that’s fine, but if they are willing to, why shouldn’t they?
A restaurant makes more business by being accommodating. It doesn’t have to accommodate every request, but it’d be stupid to blindly and slavishly adhere to a menu (though if it wants to do so, it’s within its rights to say “No” to every request. No one here has denied that.).
My opinion is that humans are omnivores. To me that means they will eat anything standing still, or even moving slowly. I have no ethical problem with eating meat. I like meat. When I did without it for a year my body was no longer used to digesting it. I also not had that many fat grams at one time (hell, I hadn’t had that many fat grams in one day) for a year. I don’t know what made me sick. All I know is that I wanted a big juicy hamburger, thought about it and decided that I really wanted a big juicy hamburger, fixed said hamburger, ate it and enjoyed the hell out of it. I did not throw up. About an hour later I started to get some stomach cramps and lo as the night follows the day I developed a raging case of diarrhea that confined me to the near area of a toilet for the rest of the night. Nothing in my diet that day was different from what I had been eating for a year. I don’t know if it was the fat, or the protein. I just know I got sick. I am not saying that everyone who doesn’t eat meat for a long time will get sick. It would not surprise me, but I don’t know it so I’m not saying it. I know I did.
Right. So Ferret Herder’s (probably imaginary) friend’s uncle is full of shit. But there she goes, posting nonsense as fact.
Even if her uncle were completely off base, what is so wrong about asking “Would you be willing to make a certain substitution?”. (Even this is not what Ferret did, as it happens. She asked “Would you be willing to leave out the meat?”, when offered a choice between two kinds, and the waiter himself volunteered the substitution of tofu. Which Ferret enjoyed. Win-fucking-win. So sorry for you that they were able to find happiness…)
Also, if you look at LHoD’s cite, it does indicate that for long-time vegetarians, there could be a real problem. I don’t know what exactly her uncle’s claim was, but it’s unclear that he was “full of shit”.
Will you please go back and read the post? She did NOT request tofu! When asked which of the two meat choices she preferred she requested no meat. This is not a dramatic thing for the kitchen to do, as obviously the meat is not already in the meal or a choice would not be offered. The waiter then asked her if she would like tofu, which she accepted and found it nicely prepared.
She did not order something that wasn’t on the menu, although I would be very surprised if tofu wasn’t on there somewhere. The waiter volunteered the substitution - which I am sure, in your opinion, he should not have done.
Of course it’s fine, why shouldn’t they? But don’t come here and claim that you’re not imposing your crazy food issues on others, when you clearly are.
Denial, it’s what’s for breakfast.
But it’s not an imposition, as such. It’s not like anybody is being forced to deal with things if they don’t want to. If the staff doesn’t want to accommodate the request, they can just straight-up say “No”.
I mean, if asking about the possibility of a deviation from the menu is an automatic imposition, then everyone who’s ever said “Hold the mayo” has been an imposer.