I’m a big wrestling fan and follow the sport. So when I came across this SI story about Kyle Dake, who was a 4 time national champion in 4 different weight classes, I became quite inspired and intrigued. Apparently, Kyle’s mom had a habit of reinforcing her son that he could do whatever he wanted and to write his goals down each day. That’s what he did and he has quite an impressive story to show for it. Check the link for more details.
It got me wondering, what do dopers do to improve themselves and reach their potential?
I can point out a few things I have found helpful.
I find affirmations helpful. I make a habit of positively reinforcing my self worth. The world is a tough place and can bring you down if you let it. Even sometimes your own mind will wear on you. I find that this is a good way to counterbalance those negative thoughts and feelings we are accustomed to hearing.
make good money.
be happy with the work you do at the end of the day. Usually, this means that others are happy with the work you have done for them.
keep a journal and write down three things you are grateful for at the end of each entry.
exercise and eat healthy
What else? I guess I’m asking this question because I feel like I’m always going two steps forward and three steps back. I think I’m looking for a silver bullet, or just some trick that will help me understand myself better, but I can never find it. I don’t think I’m alone in this as I’m sure most people struggle with doubt and regret. I just bet that some are better at hiding it than others.
Interesting! When I first met my husband, I was not impressed with how his mother thought he was such a golden boy (only child syndrome was my assumption) but now I can see how she has instilled in him the idea that if he sets his mind to it, he can do great things.
On the other hand, I was a very bright child but in retrospect was held back by my own parents who were so keen to teach me that being bright didn’t make me a better person, that they forgot to teach me that it could give me more opportunities in life.
So now as adults, my husband is successfully pursuing an ambition to be an author, whilst I take mundane office jobs that don’t really fulfill me or force me to work to my full potential.
I read a news article about a study that showed encouraging effort resulted in better performance than rewarding results. Kids that were praised on results tended to become worried about not doing well, whereas kids that were praised on effort became more willing to try new things. I can see the logic in that.
That’s because success is the result of effort and preparation. I can give you all the praise in the world for getting straight As or winning wrestling matches, but that doesn’t tell you how to get there.
Although at the end of the day, relying on the praise and approval of others to help you achieve your goals is a waste of time. Most people are mediocre. Their experience and advice will tend to herd you towards mediocrity as well because, either out of resentment or they simply don’t know anything besides doing what everyone else does. It’s really up to you to figure those goals out and find people to help you achieve them. Not bemoan that mommy and daddy didn’t hand them to you.
Drive and ambition can only take you so far. At some point, you actually need some raw talent. Try and focus on things you enjoy and have aptitude for. My takeaway from the film ‘Rudy’ is that if you bust your ass, work as hard as you possibly can, focus on your goal ahead of anything else, you might get to play the last play of the last game of your last eligible year, mostly out of pity
It could be that you actually have reached your potential. We all like to think we can be great if only we did X, Y and Z. But the reality is that most extraordinary people find their passion and talent at a young age. And then they spend thousands of hours honing it (over 10,000 hours according to author Malcolm Gladwell). There is no “magic bullet” or “great epiphany” that will suddenly make your dreams come true. That’s because the common denominator is that person having those dreams is always “you”.
People who “maximize their potential” live what they do. Whether it’s being a great athlete, artist, A+ student, Silicon Valley startup founder or otherwise the top of their profession, they don’t just up and decide to do it. They do it because they can’t imagine doing anything else. That’s really all they want to do, from when they wake up in the morning until they go to bed at night.
MsSmith, I get what you are saying. Some people have raw talent and focus beyond ordinary measures that most people will not reach. But, that’s not what I’m talking about here. I used that link because what Dake did, by writing his goal down each day, in the morning and night, was somewhat peculiar but certainly worked for him.
That’s what this thread is about. We all know that it takes effort and work to reach your goals, but that’s far too broad of an answer for this thread. I’m asking about what specific steps do you take to better yourself?