What does these Latin sentences mean?

Factual Questions
1

I bought a cushion which has this small Latin treatise on it. I liked the colours. Now I realise everybody I know will say “what does the Latin mean?” And I must admit, I’m growing curious.

Google provides links to dictionary sites, but as I know from the six months of latin study I did when I was thirteen, it’s an inflected language, and these words aren’t listed. The dictionaries work when you know enough Latin to be able to use a dictionary. Frustratin’

Here we go, spelling, caps, punctuation, exactly as on the cushion:

**LOQUERIS

Si vis me flere, Dolendum est

Telephe vel Peleu male si ipsi

DORMITABO AUT MANDATA

on satis est pulchra

Ridentibus adrident, ita

RIDEBO**
my best guess is:

**something

if you see me flying/running away it is sad/to be deplored

something something something bad if this is so

I will sleep until given the order

something beauty is enough

in case of something something, then

I will laugh**
but I look forward to being corrected.

I am also aware that it might be nonsense, as in this very interesting column of Cecil’s

Thanks everybody
Redboss

2

It’s from Horace’s “Ars Poetica” Epistula III.

The encompassing passage goes…

Non satis est pulchra esse poemata; dulcia sunto,
et, quocumque volent, animum auditoris agunto.
Vt ridentibus arrident, ita flentibus adsunt
humani voltus: si vis me flere, dolendum est
primum ipsi tibi; tunc tua me infortunia laedent,
Telephe vel Peleu; male si mandata loqueris,
aut dormitabo aut ridebo. Tristia maestum
voltum verba decent, iratum plena minarum,
ludentem lasciva, severum seria dictu.
Format enim natura prius non intus ad omnem
fortunarum habitum; iuvat aut impellit ad iram,
aut ad humum maerore gravi deducit et angit;
post effert animi motus interprete lingua.
Si dicentis erunt fortunis absona dicta,
Romani tollent equites peditesque cachinnum

Essentially, Horace is saying that Art, when too far removed from human experience is limited in what it can convey.

3

Fifty minutes. What took you so long?

Thank you VERY much Stephen. I am most impressed, as are all other Dopers, save for any other latin scholars who will just be envious.

So I gather what I have are fragments of Horace’s words that don’t actually make sense. I can see that some parts are only half words, and they’re all out of order.

Sort of a cushion-maker’s idea of a poem, isn’t it? Looks pretty, doesn’t make sense.

“You cushion-makers! You sons of cushion-makers!”

Thanks mate, champion! Any time I can do something for you, just ask!
Redboss

4

See the Latin Version

See the English translation

5

Thanks bibliophage, very satisfying.