Jack Bauer would have to construct a cell phone out of coconut shells and stray bits of wire in order to constantly talk to CTU.
Shannon would assume the Kim Bauer role, run into the woods, find a rusty old (polar) bear trap and manage to get herself caught. While being pursued by a mountain lion.
The bunker that Locke found will contain a bomb that is triggered when the bunker is opened and is set to go off in :59 minutes.
Jack Bauer will track the guy who kidnapped Claire using only a few broken stalks of grass and a general aroma of evil, tackle him to the ground, and repeatedly yell, “Where is she? Where is she?” until the guy breaks down and tells him or dies by running himself head-first into a palm tree because he’s a suicide kidnapper.
Jack Bauer will be cornered by the polar bear and kill it dead with one strike to the head with a stalk of bamboo, but not before the bear deals him a lethal blow and Jack dies. Dr. Jack will promptly bring him back to life, of course, and Jack will be back on his feet and chasing the bad guys in less than 15 minutes.
The residents of the island will start to wonder where that strange ticking clock music is coming from at the top of every hour.
Someone, somewhere on the island will lose either a finger, an arm or a head at some point.
Ok, your turn.