What is a yachts good for?

I read in another thread a signature that left me perplexed:

Elmer J. Fudd,
Millionaire.
I own a mansion and a yacht.

I am fine with rich people, this is not about envy: I am a millionaire myself in a valauble currency, and can understand living in a mansion. Both are nice. But could someone tell me what a yacht is good for? If you buy a small one, everything is too small, everything gets damp, you can’t stand up without hitting your head against something (I am 6’4"), the cooking is at best primitive, the only fresh produce may be the fish, if you catch one, the rest is canned or dried or dreadful. Internet connections are slow, expensive or non-existant. If you buy a big ship you have to stand (and pay!) the crew. Repairs are awfully expensive, everything is made bespoke and does not fit, and the food still does not taste great. Around you there is only water, the sun is too bright and the ground keeps on moving. Makes you sick. I will stop the description of my impression there; you get the general idea.
So, this is my question: what are yachts good for? How can you enjoy them? Who came up with the idea that they could be made into a luxury segment and how did he (it was a man, right?) get away with it?

Sorry for the confusion in the title between singular and plural: the title is the bit you cannot edit. :frowning: Typical me.

A lot of people like boats and spending time on them; you clearly don’t. And of course, once you have a boat, there’s always a nicer one you can get (which can mitigate a lot of the factors you mention) by spending more money. I think that’s all there is to it.

You’re thinking too small. The yachts mllionaires own s basically a floating mansion with all the comforts.

And a lot of people love being on the water.

It’s cheaper than a vacation villa on St Lucia and has the advantage of being able to visit other islands. If you entertain of lend it for the use of a business associate you can write off the expenses from your taxes.

So don’t get a small one.

Cooking need not be primitive if your luxury yacht is equipped with a decent kitchen and you come into port at least every couple of days so your crew can pick up fresh groceries.

This wasn’t even an issue until the last 10-15 years. Satellite internet is slower than cable, but it’s not terrible. It’s adequate for general surfing, and you can download a movie ahead of time to assure seamless viewing. If you’re in port, I suspect you have ready access to cellular data and/or wifi of some kind, with the kind of speeds we’re used to on dry land.

If you’re worried about cost and quality of bespoke appointments, then you’re clearly not rich enough for a superyacht.

If you’re prone to motion sickness, then sea life of any kind is probably not for you. But for someone who owns a superyacht, I suspect it’s the equivalent of a luxury RV (albeit with a crew to operate/maintain it). You come aboard the yacht in your home port, and then hopscotch your way along the coast, spending a day or two (or maybe just a night) in this port and that port, never cruising more than a couple of miles away from the shoreline. Wherever you spend any significant time ashore, you rent a car (or maybe a car with a chauffeur). It’s basically your home away from home, stocked with all the creature comforts.

Having said all that, the costs involved are indeed ridiculous.

The yacht and mega yacht owners I’ve talked with seem happy with their boats. They are a lot like other people I know with motor homes, driving around and exploring places, using the motor home/yacht as a home base.

Yachts are typically anchored and secured while the owners and their guests head to shore in small rigid inflatable tenders.

Yacht = penis
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro

You’re not really “rich” until you both have a lot of money and everybody knows it.

There are two types of people in the world - boat people and everybody else. For many years, my husband and I were boat people. It was our hobby, our recreation, and we’d hoped it would be our retirement. Even tho we sold our last boat just before I retired, we still like being on the water, and if we hit a big jackpot, we’d consider having another boat.

And, technically, a yacht is any power or sail vessel over about 25’ used for pleasure, so we’ve owned yachts: 30’, 36’, & 37’. None required hired crew, and we were able to do most of the maintenance ourselves. But when we calculated that just owning our last one, which was paid off, still cost us $500/month for docking, insurance, and maintenance, that’s when we figured our pension wouldn’t permit it. Like Mick says, you can’t always get what you want…

Link to a popular youtube channel about a couple who sail their catamaran around the world. Have a watch, you might get it or might not. It’s not for everyone.

I’m with you every fathom of the way, Pardel. You missed a few - you can’t piss standing up*; and there’s a non-zero chance of drowning for no damn reason at all. Even if the moving ground doesn’t make you sick, the person next to you throwing up will. And it’s not just that the sun’s too bright, it’s way to windy as well, so you can get frostbite and sunburn at the same time. (If you want to do this, buy a ticket to Silverstone and sit in the open stands opposite the old pit lane - at least you’ll have motor racing to take your mind off the misery.)

j

    • Well, you can in port. But that sounds like a long wait in between pisses.

It seems to me that you’d be better off just chartering a yacht when you need one, even if it costs half a million or more a week. For the same reason, I don’t understand why people buy private jets; just get a NetJets card and charter a plane when you want to get somewhere.

It’s pronounced, “Throat-wobbler Mangrove”.

Step one to owning a yacht is having enough money that you don’t notice the cost of owning the yacht. Assuming you’ve got a small yacht you’re looking at about $5mil per year in opex. I would suggest that about 5% of pretax income would be the most you’d want to spend on your yacht. So you need to earn $100mil per year which after inflation but before taxes (3%) required you to have about $3-3.5B in the bank before you can play in that world.

Once you have that kind of money you can be quite comfortable on board your 80’ boat and have it customized for how you want to use it. Think of it as spending $25mil for a mansion that can travel to the best places in the world.

Am I really the first person on this Loony Tunes loving board to point out this is a joke? Or does the OP realize that but doesn’t understand the joke? What’s up, doc?

We were in St Martin a few years ago when the super-yacht** C2** was there. I never met Ronald Perelman, but I saw one of his children on Pinel Island.

One of C2’s tenders crewed by two men who looked like secret service agents came to Pinel’s little dock. The two men were in uniform; khaki shorts, boat shoes, casual but matching shirts, sunglasses and they were wearing earbud/microphone units to keep in touch with each other.

When the tender arrived, the boy stayed aboard with one of the men while the other guy scoped out the area, walking the beach and looking for problems, I guess. Then the boy was brought over to the beach and he and one of the men played in the sand while the other man stood, constantly surveying the area. After about an hour they left.

Other than simply being an expensive toy for the super-rich, I wonder how much actual time people spend on their yachts. Assuming they aren’t “boat people” who just love spending time on the water for it’s own sake.

Like how much time does a busy CEO or celebrity actually get to spend on their mega-yacht each year? A few weeks? The entire summer?

With that level of income, yes I agree. There is a ‘sweet spot’ between us regular humans and the 1 percenters that can buy a yacht out of the change in their sofa cushions. These reasonably normal rich people are the ones that chaarter instead of buy, lease luxury properties and wear their shoes more than once …

Stand on deck, unzip and aim downwind … pissing while standing accomplished.

[I have peed using the ‘head’ facilities on an old whaler out for an afternoon. I could NOT see doing it in bad weather!]

Louis CK own(ed) a meridian 341, which looks like it has about as much interior room as a 20’ camper.

https://images.yachtcloser.com/6661044/6661044_20180328162115380_1_XLARGE-980x652.jpg

I have no idea about the price, I’d guess half a million to a million for a new one. No idea.

I’m guessing it is a form of conspicuous consumption. A way to show you have money to burn.