What is Mike trying to tell me with his hard lemonade?

I decided to get a head start on drunkenness last night so I cracked open a Mike’s hard lemonade. Then I opened another, then a third and a fourth. Oh, and I drank them too. Then I went out and drank some real booze.

After recovering this morning, I noticed that each of the caps from the Mike’s bottles had a word printed on the inside. MEN, said the first one. I like the sound of that I thought. CALLING, said the next. Still sounding good. AS on the third. Huh. STRAIGHT. What the hell?

There were two caps left untwisted and presumably two words left unrevealed. I felt compelled to see what secrets they would reveal. AS again. Finally, THIS.

CALLING MEN AS STRAIGHT AS THIS?

What the bloody hell is that supposed to mean? Why is Mike sending me secret messages under my bottle caps and whatever is Mike trying to tell me? Suggestions?

He’s telling you your gay, by questioning why you’re calling men as straight as the ones you do.

shrug

And THAT’S why I stick to Crown Royal Rye Whisky. It doesn’t judge me, accuse me, or suggest things. It just gets me drunk.

I think he’s trying to tell you to stay away from Doc Otis.

I just opened Mike’s hard cranberry lemonade, and I see he’s telling me to “lick”. I have now licked the cap completely clean and cut up my tounge. I will have to stop drinking eventually.

That Mike is going to turn me into an alcoholic. I’m pretty much just drinking the stuff to see what word I get next.

These are the words I’ve saved so far… AND, SO, BETTER, USE, WERE, CAPTURE, LOOKING, REGRET, PANTS, NO or ON, GOSSIP, SALAD, OR, and ALMOST. Sadly, I had ED but lost him.
I looked online and can’t find anything about it.

That Mike’s is some good stuff! More lemony than plain lemonade! I haven’t had any since they started putting cryptic messages under the cap. Maybe I’ll have to make my own investigation tomorrow…

I forgot to put HARD on my list.

Otto, I’ll trade you your MEN for my SALAD. I know I can do something with MEN, HARD and PANTS.

It’s probably just there to serve as ammo for a random drinking game, or even as a kind of underground marketing strategy. As in, someone will notice and either a) tell their friends, or b) ask their friends about it (witness this thread), thus giving the beverage free publicity.
Intriguing though. I’ve drunk plenty of Mike’s (the cranberry is my favorite alcoholic drink) and I’ve never seen this. I’ll have to look next time.

p.s. - The thread title made me chuckle.

Nope. I’ll keep my MEN and you can toss your SALAD.

I didn’t know they were putting words under my cap, as I am a weak, delicate flower of womanhood, and have my big, strong, burly husband open them.

Or a bottle opener, then I just toss it in the garbage. shrug

One more keyboard in the trash due to Mountain Dew spraying all over it via my nostrils…