If you’ve ever been in a candy store you’ve probably seen those enormous jawbreakers, bigger than a baseball. What purpose do those serve exactly aside from novelty item? They are too hard to bite, too large to fit in your mouth, I suppose you could hit one with a sledge hammer and eat the pieces.
They were invented for a what became a deleted scene in 1971’s Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory in which Wonka forces a snake-obsessed boy to unhinge his jaw. Studio executives of the time weren’t comfortable introducing curb stomping to the world. Nevertheless, the candy lived on.
They’re for breaking jaws.
I bought a large novelty jawbreaker once, although it was somewhat smaller than baseball-sized. After the novelty of owning it wore off, I ended up licking it, day after day, until I eventually eroded it into a hemisphere (at which point you could see all of the various layers).
One day I went overboard with the licking and actually made my tongue start bleeding a bit! Not a smart move on my part…
I dunno, what’s the point of those elaborate lollypops big enough to spread asphalt with? I think they’re just novelty items, like greeting cards the size of a door. See, Dad/Uncle Joe/Grandmaw loves you SO much, they bought one of these Brobdignagian 'treats" for you.
What it says on the tin.
Der Penthouse…
Well you can actually eat a giant lollypop easier than a giant jawbreaker.
make dentists rich.
For the honor!
Because it’s there.
I went on a 2 week roadtrip with one when I was a kid. When you get to the halfway point, you can see all of the different colored layers. Some of the layers are kind of like chalk, where you can scrape the candy loose with your teeth.
You mean those aren’t suppositories?
Uh-oh.
Das Playboy?
I don’t know what you’re supposed to do, but that’s what I did the only time I ever got one.
That’s what I did when I was a kid.
I bought one for my boss, that had a reputation of being a big mouth. I gave it to him in front of a bunch of other folks at a company meeting.
In hindsight that was probably not a good idea.
Seriously. I actually did that.
Of course the huge Sweet Tarts that came in triads had instructions to break them open with a hammer in the package before you open them. Of course, who really did that? ETA: I think it was a case of “Wine Box Instructions”, a phrase I just made up but I think it should have some staying power unless there’s already a phrase meaning “instructions needed to fulfill regulations but which no one expects to actually be followed”, stemming from the Prohibition era when companies would sell smushed grapes by mail with instructions to not fill the container with water and let seep for a few days, or else the mixture would turn into wine.
Das frauline iss looken ze hot in das boots.
I thought they were made that big as a way to keep your kid quiet for hours at a time.