What kind of Asshole puts cheddar cheese on a pizza?

Both a rant and a poll. Since it has extra Assholey goodness right in the title I picked the Pit.

So, the company is sporting pizza for lunch. The person who orders it is out of thier tiny mind, but thats not really part of this. And don’t get me wrong- free lunch is a good thing, but its not like I need it. I generally ply my masculine wiles and get free sushi. No complaints there.

Anyway, in the break room are several pizzas, or “pies” if you like. Most are one or two topping affairs and the combo was quickly dispatched by the 400lb guy. Eating two topping pizza is like fucking without coming. Nice, but hardly worth the effort. Like a tie in football or frenching your sister. But thats not really what this is about either.

One of these “pies” has cheddar cheese on it! Thats not right! What kind of Asshole puts cheddar cheese on a pizza? I even said this out loud in the break room. The 400lb guy pipes up and says proudly, “ME! I like cheddar cheese on pizza!”

I grabbed a slice of sausage and mushroom and pointed out that the query was in fact a rhetorical question. I didn’t bother telling him that I was sure he was one of them.

So, who likes cheddar cheese on pizza? ( <—thats the poll part, by the way)


I always thought cheddar was pretty standard on pizzas. at least on low grade common delivery pizzas. Have I been mistaken all this time? Do they really All have mozerella on? Mozerella that’s cheddar-coloured?

This reminds me of a time when we had ordered a couple of pizzas. We demolished the first one and opened up the second box to find several slices of American cheese melting on it! The culprit turned out to be my grandma, who when confronted, got a very wounded look on her face and informed us all that lots of people would pay to get extra cheese on a pizza! She could not seem to comprehend that there is “right” cheese and “wrong” cheese. IMO, American and Cheddar are “wrong” pizza cheese.

Cheddar is the “wrong” cheese when it’s the sole cheese on the pizza. But when you got a good three-cheese or four-cheese or five-cheese pizza going, a splash of cheddar can make for some yummity yum yum yum.

Slices of Kraft-like American cheese food product? I whole-heartedly support the “wrong” moniker slapped on that one.

When making a pizza at home (with home made dough!) I always add a small amount of cheddar cheese to the mix. I like it. My pizza cheese is about 1/2 mozzarella, 3/8 monterey jack and 1/8 cheddar. Of course that doesn’t count the fresh graded parmesan I sprinkle on top.

Takes a bite of two topping pizza

fucks without coming

I, er, must respectfully disagree.

Well, I bet…naw, way too easy.

Anyway, while cheddar would not be my first choice of fromage with which to pave a pizza, I don’t know that I’d get all, like, offended by it. Hell, many people are known to demand bizarre things like pineapple on their pizzas.

When I lived in France, most of the pizza joints (which, admittedly, were invariably run by Tunisians or Algerians rather than Italians) seemed to consider it perfectly normal to top one’s pie with a fried egg. Vive la difference, and all that.

It’s not standard in the US, at least. There are some pizza shops that offer it as an option, but the “normal” pizza cheese is strictly mozzarella.

Me. Next question?

I am beginning to realize it’s not standard anywhere. I just always assumed it was cheddar because it was the right colour. Is mozerella slightly yellow?
BTW I didn’t mean to sound narky in my first post.

Cold pepperoni and pineapple pizza is The Breakfast Food of the (Lesser) Gods. But cheddar cheese? Too greasy/oily.

When I make my own pizza and lasagna from scratch, I grate for it

– mozerrella
– sharp cheddar
– monterey jack
– colby
– parmesan and/or romano
– just about any other cheese not nailed down if it can be grated (although I loathe riccota and will not use it).

Of course, I may also add broccoli, sausage, Swedish meatballs (not as huge chunks, but spread out like, and I make the mince up using my mum’s recipe), and portobello mushrooms as a topping.

I make the crust by hand, and the resulting pizza is usually at least an inch thick. If I’m feeling cordial towards the beneficiaries, I mix parmesan and basil into the flour mixture as I knead the dough. I don’t like a thick sauce, but I do use a lot of herbs (home grown when I can manage) in the sauce, and I have made ‘white pizza’ by request sometimes.

Have not had any complaints from anyone for my pizza; in fact I get nagged fairly often when I’m a houseguest, ‘You will make homemade pizza, right?’


Okay, I can go with that.

Everywhere I’ve been and have eaten pizza (US, Canada, Argentina) Mozzarella is the standard and only cheese (well, except for parmesan and/or romano, of course). All the cooking shows I’ve seen on TV suggest this is standard in Italy as well. Certainly if someone invited me over for “pizza” and didn’t specifically say otherwise I would expect Mozzarella.

On the other hand, I don’t mind cheddar on pizza at all, as long as whatever kind of pizza can handle it. Then again, I do like “oddball” pizza, like BBQ Chicken (which often but not always comes with cheddar). I figure it’s in the same category as anchovies: Ask people if they want any FIRST. If enough people want it to justify getting a pizza with it, then do it. And, like with anchovies, let everyone know: “Hey guys, just so you know, the box with the big X on it has Cheddar”.

Lobsang: Really? All the delivery pizza there comes with goold ol’ yellow cheddar cheese? I’ll be damned. Maybe it’s an “Isle of Man” thing?

One of my favorite pizzas is the bacon double cheeseburger: Ketchup and mustard instead of tomato sauce; hamburger; bacon; lettuce (they sprinkle it on after it’s baked); and mozzerlla, swiss, and cheddar cheeses.


“goold ol’ yellow cheddar cheese”? :smack: I must be watching too much SG-1! Please ignore the extra “l” …

I’m pretty sure I was mistaken.

Actually, it is pretty standard in California with some of the larger nationwide chains. But only in a blend, not pure cheddar as the only cheese topping. THat would just be so…wrong. Mozzarella is white, not yellow.


Bingo! Thats it! It leaves a slimy “nacho” aftertaste! I couldn’t quite pit my finger on it, but I just knew it was wrong.

Another vote for ‘not bad if there’s mozarella, too’. Cheddar just doesn’t have the right consistancy when half melted, as it must be to be perfect for eating. Mozarella is the glue that holds the pizza together. Mmmm. Tasty glue.

For people who must use hamburger as the meat on their pizzas (hey, it was common in Ohio back when I lived there), cheddar could add a little, how shall I say this, actual* taste * to the pie.

And I can handle anchovies, but green olives are just wrong (Flint, Michigan).

Lobsang, what you’re probably seeing is the cheese getting a slight orangish tint from the tomato sauce, or possibly from the grease if you usually get pepperoni on it. The cheese itself should be white.