What superHEROES could James Bond beat in a fight?

Cafe Society
21

She’s the only one with extensive training in non-powered hand-to-hand martial arts, having been a student of Iron Fist (the premier martial artist of the Marvel Universe) for quite some time. Ben knows a little judo. Reed has his spy combat training. But neither has had to use their non-powered combat skills in quite some time, while Sue’s training is more recent.

This isn’t to say that she’d win a one-on-one fight with Ben; Ben’s size, strength, and ability to take a punch would likely be more than enough compensation for Sue’s superior skill.

wolfman: I agree that Bond vs. Daredevil would be a good fight. I think that’s where you’ve got to go to get any kind of a decent matchup. Bond is going to lose more often than not to the top “normal” strength guys in both the DC and Marvel U, say Batman, Batgirl, Iron Fist, Captain America, and be more evenly matched with those that are a step down, say Nightwing, Wildcat, Huntress, Daredevil, Elektra.

Of course, any character could beat any other character depending upon who the writer is. In a fictional battle, the outcome is decided ahead of time, and the challenge is to find a way to make it interesting to the reader. The Fantastic Four are way, way outta their league going up against Galactus, but Lee and Kirby had already decided that they’d win, so they did. With the right writers, I could take down the entire JLA and JSA combined.

Likewise, we could find a way for Bond to beat Superman or Mr. Fantastic if the needs of the story dictated that he was to win. But if we go at it from the other perspective, ie, without assuming a winner in advance, I don’t see Bond putting much of a dent in any superhero with powers beyond roughly Captain America level.

If the proposal were, “How could Bond beat superheroes?” Askia’s scenarios would work a lot better. But that’s not how I read the OP.

22

I have to jump in and add that “targeting at a distance” could count, for this discussion, if properly noted.

By the by…Didn’t the Punisher once subdue Wolverine by running him over with a steamroller? He got better, of course…but what I’m saying is that I don’t think Bond could only be able to triumph in a fight by shooting or personally beating his opponent to death. He’s killed people by using industrial equipment, or by old-fashioned defenestration, or by immolating them. Not to mention the usual gadgets.

But, for the record, I don’t think he’d be able to beat The Hulk. Not unless he killed Banner in his sleep.

23

Didn’t Wolverine beat the Silver Surfer in one storyline?

24

Given that Bond is (theoretically) a spy, there is a limited range of comic-book superheroes it would be appropriate for him to fight. Maybe the Red Guardian or the Red Ghost – either of them could wipe the floor with Bond! How do you think the Soviet Union won the Cold War? Wait . . .

25

Other heroes who could trounce James Bond:

Swamp Thing (the original Alan Moore earth elemental version)
Black Panther (as good as Batman, but even more ruthless and willing to kill)
Majestic (Superman analogue with a bad attitude)
Apollo, Midnighter, Jack Hawksmoor, The Doctor, OR The Engineer (individual members of the Authority; essentially a superhero team where the members were designed to be unbeatable in these fanboy debates. :slight_smile: )
Almost any magic-powered heroes (Dr. Fate, the Spectre, John Constantine)

26

I think we can all agree on one basic fact:

James Bond would kick the everloving shit out of Aquaman.

27

No one would beat Bond, because Bond has a super-power of his own - the ability to lower his enemies’ intelligence level to that of a celery.

How many times in the Bond movies did the bad guys have him dead to rights - they could have easily shot him, and they didn’t have any reason to want him alive (a la Goldfinger, where he bluffed his way out of death by pretending knowledge of Grand Slam, so Goldfinger sisn’t want another agent picking up his trail)…but instead they opted to kill him in a less certain way, paving the way for his eventual escape?

The ultimate in this, I think, was in Live and Let Die, where Tee Hee is pointing a gun at Bond, and he uses it to…FORCE HIM ONTO AN ISLAND SURROUNDED BY HUNGRY ALLIGATORS??? For crying out loud, man, if you want him dead, SHOOT HIM! Instead, as we all know, Bond not only escaped the alligators, but set the drug lab on fire to boot.

Bond would win no matter who he’s up against.

28

“That’s an omniwave raygun, Doctor, and you’ve had your 65,535.”

29

**Matter-Eater Lad

Bouncing Boy

Triplicate Girl/Duo Damsel

The Inferior Five**

30

Sorry, no.

Aquaman don’t get no love, but he’s actually really tough. Not only is he really strong and tough (not in Superman or Hulk’s league, but enough to laugh at a Walther ppk and crush Bond’s head like a grape), but he’s the soverign ruler of 2/3rds of the planet, and has limited telepathic abilities. Atlantis’ tech department more than matches Q division, and if worse comes to worse, he can scramble the vestigial fish portions of Bond’s mind. And yes, Aquaman will kill and does play dirty.

Also, he’d be damn sure that the sharks finished him off this time.

31

Okay, why did I know someone would come and defend Aquaman? And just out of curiosity, has Aquaman ever taken a bullet?

32

And the prime minister of Canada rules over 3.8 Million square miles of territory, the largest nation on the surface of the Earth. That doesn’t automatically make Jean Chrétien the biggest badass on the planet.

And Aquaman’s not invincible, or invulnerable. Remember his hand? “If it bleeds, you can kill it.” to paraphrase the Governor.

33

Remember infiltration.

Bond can gain false ID, & disguise himself.

Iron Man is very vulnerable to sabotage.

Batman can be trace by his equipment. So a carbomb in the Batmobile, or a sniper shot while Bruce Wayne is on Wayne Manor’s veranda is possible.

Many superheros are amateurs, and easily traceable by a pro.

Superman loses his powers under the light from a red sun, & this includes simulated red solar light. Q-Branch could build that.

Spiderman, with his danger-detecting Spider Sense, would be difficult indeed, as would Xavier.

The Hulk is too savage to be blackmailed, too physically tough to kill. Bond loses.

The most dangerous opponent would be the Martian Manhunter. He can change shape, read minds, become invisible, & pass through walls. He is physically superior to Bond. Yes, he is vulnerable to fire, but he has extensive training & experience living “undercover” as a Human for more than 50 years!

J’onn J’onnz mops the floor with Little Jimmy. Id Bond can even find him…

34

Far be it from me to discourage praise of Canada, but post-USSR Russia remains the largest nation on Earth, by far.

35

Spiderman’s can been taken out by a multivector attack - it overloads his Spider Sense. I suppose if Bond can chose the battleground, he can setup sentry cannons and landmines.

Hasn’t Xavier been attacked by brainwashed agents and robots before? Dunno about robots, but I’m sure Q (or R) can cram a hypnodisk into Jame’s Rolex.

36

Most superheroes (except for the Wonder Twins, of course) could easily beat Bond in a fair fight. Which is why Bond would make sure that it wasn’t a fair fight. Against any superhero with a glaring vulnerability, Bond wins. If there’s Superman in the same universe as Bond, then there’s Kryptonite in that universe, too, and Bond can get it. Martian Manhunter? Please. I think that Bond, James Bond is capable of making fire. And so on.

On the other hand, you also have the heros who are just really tough without glaring vulnerabilities. Certainly, the Hulk is in this category, as is probably The Thing. Spider-man himself might be tough, but Bond could probably attack him through MJ or Aunt Mae. Wolverine has very few attachments (all of whom are themselves superpowered), so that wouldn’t work for him, and it’d depend on whether Bond could finish him off quickly enough.

And finally, we have to consider the sneaky guys like Batman, the Punisher, etc. Here, it’s a question of which side manages to make the fight more unfair. I think this one is too close to call; their abilities are very similar.

37

My mistake, and mea culpa. But still, I wouldn’t say that such gaining and/or retaining such a position is a simple result of personal badassness. (Putin, might possibly be a badass, true. But…Yeltsin?)

38

Interesting thread.

The only thing I have to add is that, IMO, the only way James Bond could possibly defeat The Hulk, or at least survive longer than he should, would be to mess with The Hulk psychologically. Of course, Bond would have to be extremely careful. Even if he manages to calm The Hulk down somewhat, the slightest wrong word could make The Hulk totally lose it, and then Bond would have no recourse but to close his eyes and think happy thoughts.

“Ah, Moneypenny…”

Anyhoo…

39

Admittedly I don’t know much about Aquaman, but if he can live in the crushing pressure of the deep sea and swim to the surface without getting the bends, a bullet should be fairly trivial.

The Sphinx could defeat Bond easily. He can slice through guns with his mind. Plus, he’s terribly mysterious.

40

Bryan Ekers already corrected you on the first part of that paragraph. Now, let me correct you on the second. Though you didn’t actually outright say that Chretien is the prime minister of Canada, it did seem to be implied. However, pauvre Jean is no longer in charge. Paul Martin is Canada’s prime minister now.

That said, a lot of Canadians aren’t even sure who’s in charge now. It actually took me a while before I realized Ranchoth’s error. (I was also under the impression that Canada was the largest country in the world. Canadian propaganda? If so, not quite in the same league as American propaganda. :wink: ) You wouldn’t happen to be Canadian yourself, eh Ranchoth?

Anyhoo…