What To Do About Loud Co-Worker?

[Wesley_Clark]

@monstro

Get some ear buds and listen to music or white noise.

Try to see if you can telecommute.

Cube life really sucks sometimes. I have a coworker who isn’t loud. She talks a lot, but it’s usually business-related so it’s cool. But sometimes she’ll pop in ear buds and sing along to the music. It’s the kind of singing that people can do unknowingly, mistakenly believing they’re just mouthing the words and not actually making noise. If we were friends, I’d feel comfortable letting her know she’s being distracting, but we aren’t friends (she’s actually the Cookie Monster Fairy, if you’ve been following the current events of my life). When she isn’t doing this, she’s reading out loud to herself in a whisper. For some reason, whispering is more distracting to me than a regular voice.

So I wear big-ass earphones all day and drown it all out with music. 90% of the time it works. But sometimes the whispering still manages to seep through and I start to feel stabby. The other day another coworker IM’ed me and sent me laughing emojiis because she thinks the whispering is funny. But she’s not sitting right next to it.

I remember at my old job I had 3 cubicles near me where coworkers would swear at their computers all day. I wore headphones. Personally I found it hilarious because it was so juvenile.

[nearwildheaven]

@Crafter_Man

I have an engineer working for me who doesn’t do anything productive. He doesn’t do research, he doesn’t do analysis, he doesn’t design anything, he doesn’t test anything, and he never writes reports. Nothing. He spends all day going from office to office and bullshitting with people.

I tried to get rid of him. I almost lost my job over it.

Is he related to the CEO? (Seriously.)

[Marvin_the_Martian]

@Wesley_Clark

I remember at my old job I had 3 cubicles near me where coworkers would swear at their computers all day. I wore headphones. Personally I found it hilarious because it was so juvenile.

Who you calling juvenile? I even flip mine the bird when it deserves it.

[Stranger_On_A_Train]

@Crafter_Man

If you believe you are the victim of a serious infraction such as sexual harassment, do not, not, not, not, NOT talk to HR. At least not right away. Or anyone else at work. Talk to a lawyer first.

I was shocked to discover how little HR representatives appeared to no about employment law and harassment, and I don’t mean the minutiae of FLSA or caselaw; just basic information you can find for free on the Internet. Even if HR isn’t being obstructive or looking for a scapegoat, they are not a good advocate for employee rights and protections.

Stranger

[Marvin_the_Martian]

@Stranger_On_A_Train

I was shocked to discover how little HR representatives appeared to no about employment law and harassment, and I don’t mean the minutiae of FLSA or caselaw; just basic information you can find for free on the Internet.

Of course they don’t have time to learn these things. They are too busy coming up with increasingly annoying ways of doing employee evaluations/reviews.

[Dallas_Jones]

As many have advised, HR is there to protect the company* from* the humans that work there. Who is a bigger threat to the company, the happy loud mouth or the complainer? The complainer is.

Another trip to HR may result in some version of the following: “Maybe this job is just not a good fit for you.”

[Stranger_On_A_Train]

@Marvin_the_Martian

Of course they don’t have time to learn these things. They are too busy coming up with increasingly annoying ways of doing employee evaluations/reviews.

That reminds me of when I got called in for a discussion on allocating the raise pool with no notice or preparation. I pointed out that we hadn’t done the annual review process yet, and was told in response that the reviews had nothing to do with the raise pool. I mean, I was long aware of that but I didn’t expect for someone from HR to actually say that outright and with no sense of irony whatsoever.

Stranger

[Nawth_Chucka]

OP, do you have a decent enough relationship w/ Hyena McScreechy to pop over (maybe w/ a bag of mini candy bars or Rice Krispies treats) to her and whomever sits next to her near you and say something along the lines of, “I really want to get (plausible task) right and I’ve had trouble concentrating lately. Would you mind helping me keep it quieter today so I can get it done correctly and on time for for (person you or they report to)? I’d really appreciate it.”
The first time you hear her cackling so loud the ISS notices, catch her attention and say, “Please? I promise I won’t need it quiet much longer.”
It’s a temporary solution, but maybe it’ll make an impact. Can’t hurt.

[DavidwithanR]

@Brawndo_with_Electrolytes

All of this “they’ll fire you instead” talk makes this one of the most depressing threads I’ve seen ever. Equally so whether it’s true (dysfunction everywhere), or false (everybody is a coward).

I don’t think everyone is being quite THAT gloomy. It’s just that HR departments are not the only way to accomplish something. Scratch that, they’re not even ONE OF the ways. Going to talk to HR - about anything at all, seriously - is simply putting your own neck on the block, unless you’re the boss. As soon as you open your mouth in front of them, YOU are the troublemaker.

[j666]

Headphones, ideally ones designed for shooting ranges.

@Marvin_the_Martian

Of course they don’t have time to learn these things. They are too busy coming up with increasingly annoying ways of doing employee evaluations/reviews.

So it’s not just my company? Huh.

[chappachula]

@DavidwithanR

Going to talk to HR - about anything at all, seriously - is simply putting your own neck on the block. As soon as you open your mouth in front of them, YOU are the troublemaker.

I’ve always worked in small businesses, never in a huge organization, and never had an HR department.
But it seems to me that in a sense, yes, YOU are the troublemaker. From HR’s point of view, the company has been working just fine for years. Cackling Coworker and all of the cube-rats have been doing their job. Now, suddenly, one person complains.
Why now, and why this one person? What has changed?

Obviously–to them–the only thing that has changed is that one person complained and rocked the boat. And so naturally, that person looks a little suspicious.

(And yes,this thread is depressing. I’m glad I’ll be retiring soon–without ever having an HR dept or a performance review.)

[ivylass]

I didn’t present it that she annoyed just me, but that I had others in my department express their dismay at her volume. So it wasn’t just me, but it was affecting the efficiency of my department.

Earbuds are in. P!nk is singing loudly. I carry on.

I will say we had a guy on the OTHER SIDE (we’re in the middle) holler over us to them to “keep it down.” I was wondering if I should go thank him or just smile to myself.

[bordelond]

@Nawth_Chucka

OP, do you have a decent enough relationship w/ Hyena McScreechy to pop over (maybe w/ a bag of mini candy bars or Rice Krispies treats) to her and whomever sits next to her near you and say something along the lines of, “I really want to get (plausible task) right and I’ve had trouble concentrating lately. Would you mind helping me keep it quieter today so I can get it done correctly and on time for for (person you or they report to)? I’d really appreciate it.”

The first time you hear her cackling so loud the ISS notices, catch her attention and say, “Please? I promise I won’t need it quiet much longer.”
It’s a temporary solution, but maybe it’ll make an impact. Can’t hurt.

I might be a mile off … but my impression of this approach is that it (a) comes off as fake-nice hostility, but that also (b) it’s about as non-hostile approach as possible.

There’s just no nice, polite (truly polite) way to couch this kind of thing. Further, from what information we’re given in this thread … that as far as your workplace is concerned, she has an absolute right and privilege to be that loud.

[TruCelt]

Here’s a thought: What about setting up a decibel meter in a central area where Loudy McLoudface can see the display? Not intrusively in his/her space, but at an intersection of cube walls perhaps, where everyone can see it. It requires you to drop $80ish for the unit, but it might help everybody.

Best of all, install it on a weekend and not in your own area. Likely everyone will assume that HR put it there and take it as a warning to be quiet.

All you have to do is keep silent about it. That will be harder than it seems. If anybody brings it up just be interested/curious. “I wonder how loud is disruptive to the group?” “It’ll be interesting to see how much it goes up when I’m on a conference call.” Continue the conversation without indulging the speculation as to where it came from.

What do others think? See any pitfalls in the plan?

[drad_dog]

I think your best option is guerrilla passive aggressive. If the earbuds work for you I think it’s the best thing. I went through hell over this and got all the way up to mandatory arbitration. Guess who lost.

If she is not in your org you have a chance to lose her. But employers can be vengeful and if inflamed may keep you with that person.

Employers have a tendency to put problems together and see what happens. It is a way to deal with them, and move forward. Something is going to happen, and they won’t lose regardless of what it is. But you are hobbled by the fact that you want change and they don’t care, and you will have to assert the law almost magically to get past this.

[Enright3]

@filmore

Here’s an honest question I hope you don’t take offense to: Why didn’t you try to do something about it? If you know you’re loud, why don’t you make a concerted effort to talk quieter? I can certainly understand a momentarily lapse of concentration, but when it happens over and over, it seems like it would be best if that person would try harder. Especially when this person is working in a cubicle farm and even normal conversation has a tendency to carry. I could maybe understand her not thinking when talking about work, but it seems like a lot of her conversations are about social topics. If nothing else, she could go somewhere away from the cube farm when she wanted to talk about non-work topics.

No offense taken. Maybe I should have more accurately said "Loud people know they’re loud, in general because people have told them so many times in their life; but they’re never (rarely?) aware of it as it’s happening. In other words my normal voice will carry across a room. To me I’m not talking loud; my next softer voice would be to intentionally whisper. How easy would it be for you intentionally talk softer from this day forward? Talking is rarely something that people think about how they’re going to do it; it’s just a means of communication; like walking is to movement. I just do it the way I do it.

[Jasmine]

Two things:

1. One can live without a larynx.

2. Organ theft is more common than people think.

Just sayin’ …

[Yllaria]

A hidden speaker that can be remotely triggered to play bagpipe music would probably be counterproductive. And hooking one up to a decibel meter would probably result in a deadly feedback loop.

If I had to wear earplugs, though, I’d probably imagine bagpipe music as I donned them. Just for internal giggles.

[Jackmannii]

People who are habitually loud generally know it, and do not care about causing offense with their blaring voices and caterwauling laughs.

Some think that makes them “free spirits” and thus superior to others.

[kaylasdad99]

Has anybody considered trying this?