With the possible exception of The Barn House!
The [Games] contingent complains monthly about being knocked off the first page by sports enthusiasts and wants them moved to their own forum.
This made me choke on my tea 
I like this! A Monday Morning Pit that is then hijacked for everybody else’s personal pittings! Genius! 
For example, we’d see the return of Smashie, and we could introduce Barfy.
The Bizarro Dope, your direct line to thousands of the worst dipsticks on the planet, plus a few smart, hip people."
That and everyone goes “huh?” after a Monty Python reference.
Hey, everybody! Come stand on my lawn! That’s what it’s here for!
In the words of Bizarro Nephew-Cece #A: “Us hate learning! Us love ignorance! Us do things backwards of Cecil Adams way!”
Everybody hates Brooklyn Nine-Nine. Because it’s too hard to count to “9, 9.”
Any time someone uses an injoke like, “Once, in ‘Rio’ by Duran Duran, for twenty minutes,” it’s remarked upon in confusion by several persons.
Mod warnings for not using rude words in posts.
Sagesguinea, most beloved of all Dopers, He-Who-Breathes-Life-Into-Threads, *always *reads the thread first.
I’m too OLD to have knowledge and wisdom; GET YOUR OWN!
[GAME] threads do not dominate half of the first page threads in The Game Room. As a mater of fact any attempt to start a game thread is met with derision and haughtiness.
How it really was here in about 2004 or so
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Calling another poster a cunt would get you instant charter membership and a special award to display in your garish animated avatar pic.
There are often threads started about the widespread racism and sexism during the 60s, and how it’s so great that we’ve moved on from that kind of systematic, institutional discrimination and haven’t glorified it in any way.
Oh, and isn’t it wonderful how parents are so attentive to their children nowadays? You’ll always see Mom or Dad sitting on a bench by the park while their kids play. No more senseless accidental deaths of children that scar their families and ruin lives. Man, the 21st century sure is great.
Banned for Posting Pictures of Kittens would be a rule.
Barn House would have been a section exclusively for “Devotee” dating.
We would all have a mountain to go up to and throw shit on when we got bored.
And there would be a rumor about what some Goats did with Hal Briston.
Used to have to pay for it, then it was all free for a while. Now, you pay to not see your post count.
Attempts to revive in-jokes would be met with a chorus of, “Dude, that was said fifteen years ago, isn’t it time to move on?”.
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“We’ll be offline for a few hours tonight, while we move the SDMB to a faster server, and upgrade to the latest version of XenForo.”
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“Fedoras and trilbys look really stupid. I don’t know why anyone would wear one, with the whole neckbeard persona they’re attached to.”
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“Free refills of fries at Applebee’s? NOM NOM NOM. Sounds great, but I really have to watch what I eat.”
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“I agree with everyone else. If you aren’t going to read those old travel books again, just recycle them.”
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“I just bought a new TV!”
“I had to throw out my last shelf of books in order to make room for it. But no big deal. Who wants to read when you could watch TV instead, am I right?”
New TV? Here’s detailed instructions on how to get all those PPV shows for free!!