ur rong bowt dat alturnet gramer & speling & punktooashun r sellibrated cuz thay sho wur knot bounded bi da olefashun roolz o langwej wee bee fre 2 rite da wey wee wanted 2
Tin Fore! Rite awn! Ture!
Those of us participating in the deathpool threads have resigned ourselves to the constant police surveillance that results from our uncannily accurate predictions of upcoming celebrity deaths.
Controversial statements are met with “That sounds good - I will take your word for it”.
George Bush would be widely considered the greatest President of modern times.
There would be half a dozen threads saying “You believe the Holocaust happened? How gullible can you get?”
And, of course -
[QUOTE=Freudian Slit]
Up Yours,
Shodan
[/QUOTE]
Ambivalid would be infamous for rants complaining that he should be able to park in handicapped spots at Baskin Robbins, because he’s just going take a minute or two to walk his fat ass in and get more ice cream.
Nobody believes we went to the moon, and the occasional ‘falser’ is demolished in hundred-page long threads.
Everybody agrees on the right way to hang toilet paper.
Posters with the most recent join date will be the most trusted and respected.
The Straight Dope doesn’t need to be posted to the Internet. Everybody just KNOWS!
“Uncle Cecil” is a 15 member cabal of dementia patients.
“I think that <insert anything remotely Beatles related> may be over-rated.”
Personal insults am not permitted in the Pit.
Personal insults am required in all other forums.
Failure to insult posters in forums (other than the Pit) am a banning offense.
Only banned posters am allowed to post.
ETA: All posters am required to be jerk.
More ETA: Hamsters am well fed. Hamsters am hard working. Board am fast.
Only paid members get to see ads.
Cats?
Meh.
Take 'em or leave 'em.
Slug Signorino is renowned for his tasteful and understated artwork.
Kenny G would be considered a great and under appreciated artist.
Bizarro Dope has cool smilies, even some animated ones. And the admins even add new ones on request. Also, you can embed YouTube videos, not just post links.
No ideas intrigue us and we would not like to subscribe to anyone’s newsletter.
Rio by Duran Duran would be just another song and the Mariannas would be just another trench.
My kids haven’t been diagnosed with any disorders and frankly aren’t all that bright, much like me at their age.
Reading sucks, and so does bacon.
Posters complain in ATMB because the mods respond immediately, and post clear and detailed explanations of the rulings.
Bricker keeps getting warned for diving into threads and posting “Who gives a fuck what the law says? Just do whatever seems right.”
Pimple threads drop off the front page because no one opens them.
Opal faked her death, and Wally7 didn’t.
Skald the Rhymer keeps pestering the mods to have the Poll function disabled.
And Ed Zotti really is Cecil Adams.
Regards,
Shodan
Let us form a resistance movement to defy our new Overlords!
Straight Dope Chicago is the most popular forum with informative and thought-provoking threads.
All other forums have 3 participants and nobody gives a damn about any of the threads.