What would you do if you were on Moya?

In My Humble Opinion
1

Okay, Scaper geeks, here’s the question… and for those of you who have no idea what Moya is, don’t worry. It’s just Farscape, the new Sci-Fi Channel show that finally makes space opera worth watching every week.

Anyway, as much as I admire John Crichton, and as much as I sometimes identify with him, I’ve got to say he and I are two completely different guys.

For one thing, Crichton (1) hooks up with Aeryn Sun, (2) picks on Rygel, (3) became fast friends with D’Argo, (4) manages to avoid Chiana’s advances, (5) stays platonic with Zhaan, and (6) doesn’t have much of a relationship with Pilot at all.

Me? I would almost certainly (1) stay platonic with Aeryn, but try to work out with her to keep in shape, (2) give Rygel a break sometimes and even refer to him as “Your Highness” when asking for a favor, (3) remain scared of D’Argo the whole voyage and always suggest sending him first into dangerous situations, (4) get into a very brief but no doubt enlightening relationship with Chiana before she finally dumps me, (5) try everything in my power to hook up with Zhaan, and (6) become fast friends with Pilot.

For one thing, Zhaan and Pilot are the two most alien beings on Moya, and therefore the ones I’m the most curious about, as well as the most peace-loving and gentle, so I think I’d get along with them. For another, Zhaan is… well, Zhaan. Okay, so she’s technically flora, and over eight hundred years old, and she ended up murdering her last lover, but hey, every relationship has its ups and downs. Anyway, she’s telepathic and can experience photogasms, and how mind-blowing is that? And John Crichton joins her in Unity once and then forgets about it? I just don’t understand him sometimes… Anyway, I’d probably spend a lot of my spare time hanging out with Pilot, just getting to know him better, trying to find out what life is like being bonded to a living spaceship and exploring the galaxy. I sure as hell wouldn’t let the rest of the crew chop his arm off, like in “DNA Mad Scientist.”

Anyway, what about the rest of you Scapers? What would you do if it were you out there in the Uncharted Territories instead of John Crichton?

2

First off, let me say that after last week’s episode, I decided that should Farscap run at least two more seasons, it will be the best Sci-Fi show ever (yes, that includes Star Trek–ANY generation).

But with the exception of how he treats Sparky, I’d do pretty much what he does. I think I’d be a little nicer to Rigel. But not much.

His relationship with Pilot is getting better, though.

3

If I were on Moya, I would kick ass, abuse Rygel, and send mixed sexual signals to Crichton. But you knew that, right? :wink:

Seriously, if I got shot through a wormhole and ended up as the only human on board? I would probably wind up hanging out with Aeryn and D’Argo because they are the most practical, yet ethical, folks on board. Zhaan is very nice, but too “spiritual” for me, and Rygel and Chiana must be watched with a suspicious eye at all times. Pilot seems to keep to himself in a way, and he is so passive I doubt I could strike up a great relationship with him. I belong more in the “if it’s dangerous, let’s shoot it” camp.

4

My kind of Scaper!

I’m kind of pissed, tho. I’m going to miss Friday’s episode. I’ve got to drive up to NC, and my VCR won’t record :frowning:

5

Fear not, blessedwolf, I don’t think Farscape is on this Friday. IIRC, last Friday’s “coming attraction” promotion for the next episode stated that it would be “in two weeks”, meaning they’re skipping this Friday. Don’t take my word as law or anything, but I think you’ll be OK.

Anyway, “What I’d Do If I Were On Moya”:

Rygel gets treated the same, the sneaky little toad. Feh on him and his kingdom. He gets better treatment when he earns it.

D’argo, I’d hang with on occasion, but he’s mighty quick on the trigger, so probably not often.

For Chiana, I’d have to say my plan would be “freaky circus sex until one or both of us becomes comatose or crippled.”

Aeryn would be an excellent workout partner, and probably the person I’d hang with most. She’s a girl who’s into guy stuff, like guns and kicking ass; once I teach her to love the Dallas Cowboys, she’s damn near perfect.

I don’t see sex with Zhann as a possibility, but I do have a philosophy/law background, and sometimes I feel like a debate on “deep” subjects. For that, she’s ideal.

Pilot is among my favorite characters, but I suspect you’d run out of things to talk about pretty quickly; let’s face it, the guy (?) doesn’t get out much. Still, he’d be mighty interesting to hang with for as long as it lasted.

Beyond that, I dunno. It’s not like there’s someplace on the other side of the universe that I’ve always wanted to visit.