Yeah, I will use the laundromat excuse.
I still find eyebrow’s post funny, as in LOL. Can I now make more un-pc jokes about people of different races since I’m not a white redneck? 
I kid, haha!
Hey, we need more details: boxers? briefs?
What color?
What material?
What pattern?
What condition?
Or, what we call them in the hood…a whore’s bath.
What the actual fuck?
You found a foreign.item of laundry in the house and the police will be interested how? There are probably dozens of perfectly innocent accidental ways this could have happened, as well as many not-so-innocent-but-still-not-illegal ones - none of which the police are going to give a damn about.
So what possible sinister illegal scenario did you have in mind?
If you’ll read posts # 13 & 15, you’ll see that she has not suggested that the police will be interested, she’s not the one who thought of calling the cops, and she doesn’t have any illegal scenario in mind. She’s dealing with her father, who seems to be a nutcase regarding the situation.
I did read them, but had trouble making sense of them in the context.
Well there’s your problem – you thought there was some sense to this! 
Is he worried about competition, or what?
That would make two.
Well, first the bus had to cover half the distance to her. Then half the remaining distance. And half the distance after that.
There’s oodles of time to get out of the way. She’ll be fine.
But how does that work if there are an infinite number of busses?
Even simpler. To avoid an infinite number of buses, you must move in an infinite number of directions. But from wherever you are, movement in all those infinite directions will tend to cancel each other out. So you just stand still.
…move to my town. I had to wait in 98 degree heat yesterday, for a bus that was half an hour late.
An extremely finite bus, may I add.