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You idiot; you ARE good looking! No go out and talk to women and get laid already! NOW!
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Seriously, DialAmerica as a career? Don’t make me laugh.
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Seriously, Albany, NY? Finish up with school and get the f**k out of there.
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Just come right out and ask that girl in history class on a date! Do it! For that matter, ask Steve’s friend out too.
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Have you ever considered law school? Kick ass your last couple of semesters, and you can get into a good one! Don’t wait, apply now!
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If you meet a girl named Eileen, forget the friendship. Ask her out.
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Don’t be so hard on yourself. Lighten up and have some fun, whydoncha!
You have something called Attention Deficit Disorder. It’s why you can never do as well in class as you think you should be able to do. Ask someone at Student Health about it.
Oh, and while you’re there, get a scrip for that new drug, Rogaine.
And yes, Kellie was coming on to you in the radio booth there. Just swallow your fear and go for it.
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Don’t worry, it gets better.
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It’s not “just a phase.” You’re not “just curious.” You’re not “waiting for the right woman.” You’re 100% homosexual. Get over yourself; it’s not a bad thing.
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Anyone who’s got a problem with #2 isn’t worth your time. It’s their problem, not yours.
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Do NOT buy that pack of cigarettes. You are NOT different from everyone else, you do NOT have extraordinary willpower. You have all the willpower of Robert Downey, Jr. That reference will make sense to you in a few years.
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A job is there to give you money so you can enjoy your life. It isn’t your life. Don’t put so much energy into your job that you lose sight of everything else.
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Remembering #2, go to Washington D.C. and look up <name withheld>. Probably nothing will come out of it, but I’m just curious to see what would’ve happened had you met him earlier.
And luckily, 21-year-old SolGrundy would’ve ignored most of that advice and things would’ve ended up the way they are now anyway, which is pretty good. Except for #4.
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She’s about to leave you. Let her go- you’re MUCH better off without her. Keep your dignity, man!
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That money you just inherited? Only use part of it to get the Celica (it’s a good car, it’ll serve you well). With the rest, look up a guy named Michael Dell…
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You CAN make a living as an artist , despite what the family has always said (even though, assuming you listened to me about Dell, you won’t need to). Go to Origin, look up Denis and Steve. Talk your way into a job. Don’t let the company overwork you, though, and don’t let 'em lie about the bonuses. If that doesn’t work, go back to school- yes, in art.
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Keep jogging. Trust me on this.
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You know how you never seem to have any energy or drive to do anything? There’s a reason- depression gallops in your family, you dope! Go see a doctor about it.
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And finally, lose the stupid looking moustache, shave the head, and grow a goatee. You’ll feel much better.
Give up tobacco now; it’s much easier than 25 years from now.
When you think he is cheating on you, he is.
You do not need proof.
Take the kids and leave now.
That is good advice.
You’ve just had a marvelous, stupendous year. Don’t screw it up by dragging things out with That Boy for another year. You’ll respect yourself more for owning up to the truth now, plus it leaves you that last year of college to get wild and crazy!
Learn to save money.
Stick to your guns about credit card spending.
You’re going to make mistakes, and that’s okay.
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Word up, Me One Month and Twelve Days From Now.
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Anything different?
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No? Cool. So, how many people try to get me drunk on my birthday?
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That many, huh? Dang, that will be annoying. Should I hit them with a stick?
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…hmm, now there’s an idea. Well, see ya later.
It’s all going to work out.
- Stay in school
- Don’t wait until your’re 42 to graduate from college.
- Use protection
- Wait to get married
- Enjoy your life up age 25 or so… they’re the best years of your life. The ultimate in “Old enough to know better, too young to care”.
6)When your dad give you his class ring, put it in a safety deposit box.
Many of these responses contain admonishments against fucking up your young life over a romance that you knew at the time was going terribly wrong. I can only add a hearty, “Hear, hear!”
It gets a trifle better when she sends you a groveling email several decades later, describing her time with you as the best years of her life. Heh, heh; so she did get just what she deserved, after all.
Play out that dream, and then go to school only if and when you’re ready.
Don’t be a scaredy-cat.
Pay your damn bills - it just gets worse the longer you sidestep them.
Stay in touch with your friends.
Keep your options open, up to a point. When you commit to a career, commit!
Buy a house.
That’s downright EERIE. (I hope you ducked.)
Well, I had a pretty long list, then I lost it by mistake. It’s getting late, so I’ll just go with this one:
When you re 29, you will meet a woman. Much to your surprise, you will fall in love with her. Do not panic. Do not run. Do not play head games with her. Do not doubt her. Unlike you, she knows EXACTLY what she is doing, and she loves you more than life itself. You’re not worth it, but don’t let that slow you down. Most of all, don’t waste time. She has AIDS, and you don’t have much time left. (Remember that article you just saw in the NY Times about a weird disease that gay men get from using poppers? Well, it doesn’t just kill gay men, it has NOTHING to do with poppers, and you’ll be hearing a whole lot more about it, trust me.)
Don’t despair, though. Don’t pull her down with your inability to hope. Accept help from her friends. Tell your family about her, you idiot! You don’t have time to waste being afraid. Homophobia is nothing compared with what you are facing, and you can’t waste energy worrying about it. And for God’s sake, don’t pull the plug. If you do, you’ll never know if she would have made it, and it will torment you forever.
Just thought of some more …
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That really hot chick that you’re nice enough to drive home from work so she doesn’t have to walk in the dark alone? When she invites you into her house, TAKE THE HINT!!!
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Buy Microsoft stock (1991, when I was 21). Then sell it at around the beginning of 2000. Don’t wait too long to sell it or you’ll regret it.
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Early morning, September 11, 2001, come up with a way to delay all air travel flying out of Boston.
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No matter how desperate your friends are for a loan, DON’T DO IT! Suuuuure they’re gonna pay you back!
Wow, some great advice in this thread. Some of it sounds an awful lot like what I’ve been giving my nieces and nephews who are at or approaching that age. Some of it sounds like advice I’ve been giving to a friend twice that age…
If I could go back now and talk to my 21 year old self:
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Your fiancee is about to dump you. It’s gonna hurt like hell. It’ll probably also be one of the best things that’ll ever happen to you.
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Exercise, dammit. Getting back in shape years from now is gonna be a bitch.
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Go to as many Grateful Dead shows as you can. They aren’t going to be doing this for nearly as long as you think.
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This young woman is going to sit next to you on a bus one day. She’s the one. You’ll know. Problem is, you’re gonna have to get kicked in the teeth a few times before she comes along.
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Listen to your instincts. They aren’t always going to be right, but you’ll kick yourself when they are and you ignored them.
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Last, but certainly not least: You’re gonna regret the things you didn’t do a lot more than the things you did.
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Don’t buy the Vanagon. In fact, don’t buy any used cars. Bite the bullet and get a new one.
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Live within your means.
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Don’t let fear stop you. Take a chance.
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Live simply so that your possesions never own you or tie your down.
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Spend your money on travel. Make it happen. Always be putting together a trip.
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Distance yourself from your mother; she is destructive. Call your dad more.
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Congrats on completing boot camp, and yes, NNPS will prove to you that you do have the brains to succeed. You could have been #1 in the class, but you chose to have more fun, instead. Good plan, dude.
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Laura. Don’t fall for her. She’s a friend, but she’s also a coward and when you find out she’s getting engaged to someone else while you were courting her you’ll keep quiet about your knowledge, and about a year and a half after that, once she’s married for over six months, she’ll finally 'fess up.
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Get your head out of your ass and get in touch with Letitia! When someone cries because you’ve told them you’re leaving school, it’s not sympathy, you idiot!
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You’re not fat, now. You’ve lost weight, you twit. Don’t stop exercising. It’s a pain in the arse, but it’s nice to have a healthy body with a resting heartrate in the mid 60’s.
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You do have a chance with all the pretty women you’re about to meet. See #4 above. Don’t let your fear of rejection keep you from making an effort.
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Do not expect the rest of the Navy to be as good as boot camp is/was. Training commands are always set up to be as close to ideal as possible. If you keep exercising you’ll likely be a 1st Class before you get out in 1993. (Yes, I meant 1993. The ship you’re going to get assigned to is going to end up being decommed.) Likewise, if you keep exercising, and keep control of your weight you may be eligible for NECP or other officer training. I’m not telling you to do that - there are good reasons I’m glad I’m not in the Navy, now - but at least leave yourself that option.
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Keep up with the investment plan. Don’t let yourself find your bills going out of control. In particular, don’t ever call a 900 number. No matter how lonely/horny you get. Go out and meet people, instead.
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Be very leery of using credit cards.
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If you take no more of my advice, take this: When Lt. Kelso asks if you want to see a shrink, for God’s sake, say “Yes”!!! You’ll be kicking yourself for that one mistake for ten years after the fact.
This thread is great! I am 21, so this free advice rocks.
Lemme think, what do I need to tell myself? Uh…do your laundry. And finish your Greek take-home exam so you can go play with Kelly to celebrate the end of finals week.
