What you're going to do with your life?

When I was 14, I hoped that one day I would have a girlfriend.

When I was 16 I got a girlfriend, but there was no passion. So I decided I needed a passionate girl with a zest for life.

When I left school, I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was an emergency, she was a drama queen, cried all the time and threatened suicide. So I decided I needed a girl with stability.

When I was 25 I found a very stable girl but she was boring. She was totally predictable and never got excited about anything. Life became so dull that I decided I needed a girl with some excitement.

When I was 28 I found an exciting girl, but I couldn’t keep up with her. She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything. She did mad impetuous things and flirted with everyone she met. She made me miserable as often as happy. She was great fun initially and very energetic, but directionless. So I decided to find a girl with some ambition.

When I turned 31, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet planted firmly on the ground and married her. She was so ambitious that she divorced me and took everything I owned.

I am now 40 and am looking for a girl with very big tits.

Why? Why did they make a sequel to President Bush when the first one really wasn’t any good?

I wanna rock, to paraphrase Twisted Sister.

Well, Uniball, it’s good to hear that you’ve finally got your priorities straight.

Yikes—steering clear of Uniball is now part of my life’s plan.

As for Baby, I have about another three or four books to write. That should take me about ten years, by which time my money and health should be just about giving out, and it will be time for me to Join the Choir Invisible.

Anyone else? What’s YOUR big life plans?

First of all, I am going to print the OP on some nice paper, frame it, and hang it on my wall. I thought I was reading my romantic history. Truer words were never spoken. Sorry Eve.

When I split with my ex, I made up my mind to persue a career in the music biz. I’m a very good guitarist and singer, but I’m pretty much too old to be a rock star. Plus trying to keep a band together is as hard as being married.

I’ve always been interested in writing and producing music, and when one of my former bandmates invested in some recording equipment and declared he was going into business, I jumped at the chance to work with him.

I still have to work a day job, but I’m inching closer and closer to being a self-employed record producer.

First and foremost I will continue to search for inner peace and tranquility. Seriously. This has been a goal for almost three years now and I feel closer than ever, although I still have many miles to travel.
Secondly, now that both of my children are “grown” (my lovely daughter turned 18 last Saturday!) I will follow through on my long term goal to write and perform more. I’m a storyteller, not a great one, but a pretty good one, and write a lot of my own material. I have been actively telling for almost ten years and have told for audiences as small as 5 and as large as 6000. I don’t really have any illusions about making it a full-time job (believe it or not I actually like what I do for a living) but would like to spend as much time as possible performing. While I have pursued this goal dogedly, single-parenting a teenage daughter requires a great deal of time and energy! So, having promised myself that once the kids were taken care of (I know, I know, they are never completely taken care of, but you know what I mean) that I’d redirect my time and energy into telling. Well, the time has arrived!
Thirdly, I’ll continue to be thankful just to be here and look for the opportunities that avail themselves in every coincidental meeting and circumstance.
Fourthly (and lastly!) I’ll continue to be my own goofy self as long as I do nothing to infringe upon the life or liberty of another human being!

I will be published one day. That is one thing I do know.

I have been toying with the idea of looking into writing columns ( humor, parenting issues) because everyone who reads my stuff just cries with laughter. ( The fact that they are brain dead helps.)

I will have all three of my toilets scrubbed at the same time. ( I’m not sure why this is a big goal for me, but it is the K2 of " Things I really should do, but really never give a rat’s ass about.")( The guest bathroom toilet is nearly always presentable, just in case you ever stop by.)

My goal for 2001 is to get out of the house more. With my daughter being more mobile and napping less, I should be able to take the kids to the zoo and muesums more often. Bike rides and walks are a definate plus. Maybe swim and gymnastics for my son.

Find some resolution on just where I am spiritually in life. I am definately not Catholic anymore. I don’t feel this burning need to attend church and reading the bible is definately lower on my list than getting a bikini wax in January, but I do know the importance of showing my children a spiritual life, not necessarily religous life.

After I figure this out, the next step will be breaking the news to my husband. Naturally, I’ll be wearing a teddy :slight_smile:

I have been working on this one for months, stop allowing my sister in laws life ( religious and prudish and selfish) which is fine for her, to stop irritating me. If she wants to be a bible toting,defer-to-men-in-all-subjects-martha-stewart-brain-
dead-lemming-wanna-be, that is her choice and I have to live with it. [sub]It’s just so hard to see a seemingly smart person be so fucking clueless. [/sub] I mean, if everyone were like me, then there would be no one left to mock.
Write more.

That’s just short term stuff. The next year. Long term is too hazy right now, but it has something to do with being published, traveling with hubby. Traveling with kids and getting my dog to come when called.

First and foremost I will continue to search for inner peace and tranquility.

—“There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness or death.” . . . Fran Leibowitz

I also (hi el_mono :slight_smile: ) have an 18 yr old daughter, and we are going our separate ways. I am still getting used to the idea that I have my life to myself, and about 25 years or so to do anything I want! Although I miss my daughter, I chose to move to another town (after being rooted in the last one for 22 yrs) and to gear down in terms of career & earning power. And now - I am going to ditch it all and go to school for a year at the vocational school that I currently work at!

Yahoo! A totally new type of work, a career choice that I nearly made when leaving high school, but didn’t pursue. Computer techhie :). I can hardly wait for classes to start!

In the meantime, I want to put the parts together of a novel I’ve started writing. It confounds me that I can be so organized in almost all aspects of life & work, but I can’t figure out how to organize the drivel I’ve written into readable chapters. Feh.

Hmmm after I graduate college with my astrophysics degree I want to go work for NASA. WHEN I do that I’ll be happy.

I was not joking above. I really do wanna rock, hopefully going platinum eventually, in order to circumvent the otherwise seemingly inevitable succession of menial jobs that would otherwise consume my life.

Seriously, I’d like nothing more than to play music for a living. That’s it, really.

EVE: I’ll respond with a couple of quotes myself.

“The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts.” MARCUS ANTONIUS

“The most powerful thing you can do to change the world is to change your own beliefs about the nature of life, people and reality to something more positive- - - and begin to act accordingly.” SHAKTI GAWIN

“I’ve learned enough to know I’ve lots to learn.”

lost: Good for you! I understand what you are feeling. It’s tough to let 'em go, but at the same time there is a wonderful sense of release and freedom. You’ve done your best and can only hope that they succeed and prosper. Follow those dreams and I wish you all the best. Here’s some positive energy that you can dip into if needed. (POSITIVE ENERGY CAPSULE): Use as necessary to overcome doubt and frustration.

I’m going to raise my daughter to be a nobel-prize winning astrophysicist. I don’t have time for much else. :slight_smile:

In two years my wife and will move aboard a 37 foot sailboat and sail and dive the Caribbean for a few years.

It’s way to late for me to worry about that, all I have left are regrets. And if I’m lucky another 35 or 40 years to think about them. I’d be happy if my kids turn out to be good law abiding citizens who can support themselves and don’t turn out to be assholes that shit on people on a regular basis.


Why? Do you have big honkers?

Ideally, I’ll graduate Mississippi State University in June 2005 with a Bachelor’s in Communication, and go to work in Charlotte, NC (or Stuart, VA) with a NASCAR team. I’ll hopefully spend my career within the NASCAR circuit, doing various behind-the-scenes jobs that enable me to get free race tickets once in a while. :slight_smile:

Eventually I’ll get married, settle down, wonderful husband and 2.5 kids and a dog and a cat and a parakeet and a stable of nice cars and a full-time job that I might be able to do from home, if I’m just paperwork girl.

Even if part A never gets done, part B will.