What's The Longest Fight You Ever Had With Your Significant Other?

Just wondering? An hour, a day, a week, a year?

For the purposes of this thread, you have had to make up again.

For instance, if you said, I had a fight with her on Dec 31, 1989 and we got a divorce and that was that.

Since you ended the relationship that wouldn’t count.

I also mean verbal or emotion fight, I am not talking about going 12 rounds in boxing ring :slight_smile:

Also how did you end this lengthy fight?

A year, exactly.
We had a big fight on my birthday, and stopped talking to each other.
A year later, she called me up to wish me and we were both blubbering and got back together.
We broke up again, 2 weeks later.
I do NOT miss that time of my life.

With my current SO?

Maybe … 30 minutes?

A few hours, maybe? I can’t leave things unresolved. None of that going to sleep mad bullshit for me. I will provoke a conflict if I have to just to get it over with. We went through a dark period in our relationship shortly before we married, in which we fought often enough that maybe we never really stopped fighting. In which case I would say, three months. It was awful and we vowed never to go there again. So far, so good.

Before we can make up, I have to calm down. This usually takes a few minutes, even after I realize I’m wrong. So often our fights end by the conversation becoming less angry and more collaborative. We may stop fighting without realizing we’re not fighting any more, as tempers cool and we begin to understand where the other person is coming from. For example, a few months ago we had a significant argument that started out with my husband reaming me for spending money we didn’t have, and me reaming him for not communicating with me about his end of our financial situation. The yelling eventually just became conversation about finances, and by the end of the night we had worked out a budget for the next year.

For shorter conflicts, one of us will usually approach the other with a nonverbal cue of reconciliation, such as a hug. Typically this is me, because to be honest with you, I’m usually the one at fault. Once we’ve made the physical connection, we apologize, then talk about what happened to see if we can make changes to avoid it in the future.

Never. I have fought with myself, but never with my partner.

I absolutely adhere to the concept of not going to bed mad at one another. Our disagreements get hashed out and resolved right then and there. So if I’ve had one that’s lasted as long as 30 minutes, it would be unusual.

Well, let’s see. We got married in mid-1986, so…23 and a half years?

Seventeen years, give or take. We bought the house in the early '90s. The bedrooms are tiny, and I pretty quickly decided that the best thing to do, based on the way we were using the space, was to knock out a wall separating our bedroom from an even smaller bedroom to make one great big bedroom with lots of light and great airflow. cwPartner didn’t see the point. We argued about this several times a year.

THIS YEAR we finally had someone take out the fucking wall after I said it was either that or move to a new house. And yes, I was right - the new space is fantastic.

Has she admitted you were right all along? I would be hard pressed to resist milking that one for a long, long while.

I moved out in March. I bought my house in May. We’re still married and I go over and clean his house and do the kids’ laundry. We both have keys to each others house and when I bought my house I wanted his name on the deed as well (just in case something happened to me). So, I’d say this fight has gone on for over 6 months.

Yeah, and he’s admitted he was a real shit about it, too, so I don’t dare milk it too much.

Oops… dunno why I assumed the reverse gender roles. Sorry!

Mrs. Homie and I have been having the same fight for 13 years. When we’re in the car, I like mellow music (jazz, usually) at a quiet volume; loud enough that I can hear it, but soft enough that I can carry on a conversation with her. She turns on fucking ghetto music and blasts it so loud the cars in the opposite lane of the highway can hear it.

We still haven’t come up with a solution. :mad:

When I was married, I think the longest fight we had lasted at least a month. It took a day or two before I realized we were having a fight…he stopped talking to me, and I didn’t notice right away! Then, when he refused to speak to tell me what was bugging him, and started talking through the kids, I decided that I was kind of liking the silence and the lack of arguing, so I just decided to see how long he could hold on to the snit. It took him about a month to decide he had punished me enough. Apparently I hadn’t thanked him enough for helping do the dishes one day.

You realize it could be two people of the same gender, right?

There were some things which never got resolved (that’s why I didn’t marry him, I didn’t see us as being good at solving those), but the few times The Best Boyfriend and me had an argument, it was solved within minutes. The worst one took him about 45’ to calm down completely, but he’d been boiling inside about the fact that I was leaving, so I think it was more about this than about the official argument.

Yeah, that too. Should have avoided pronouns entirely there.

What is your definition of “Fight” ?

Actually SHOUTING AT EACH OTHER IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS IN A HEATED MOMENT OF MARITAL DISCOURSE? For us, a record one sentance each, back in 1999, right after Xmas.

There are specific subjects that we realize neither of us will budge on, most recently and a breaking point for us is: Broom Vs. Swiffer Thingy.

If one of the definitions of “fight” is “I’m going to politely pretend I don’t know you til I’m no longer pissed,” I’d say…about a day and a half.

That only happened once; normally I’m back to normal within half an hour or so, but this particular fight was one of those where, even after the apology, I still wasn’t “over it” til the morning after the apology.

The thing about apologies is…just because you’ve forgiven someone doesn’t mean you’re in a good mood about it, or about anything in general. And this goes for any relationship, not just the one with your main squeeze. I know you’re sorry, and I’m sorry too, but I gotta have a little time to get back to normal. We’re not gonna be our normal cuddly selves for a bit. Sorry. :smiley:

LOL :smiley:

I’m sorry that is just one of the funniest things I ever heard of

We’re going on about 4 years now - fun & games, let me tell ya…