I’m a parent who’s just spent X amount of time and dollars buying presents for my kid. Why in the world would I tell my kid that some mythical being is responsible?
I think for the same reason that people read fairy tales to their kids, rather than non-fiction. Children’s imagination and sense of wonder need to be exercised. Eventually they’ll have to grow up and face the world of harsh realities. Do what you can to postpone that.
Well, in my case it was so that one day I could say, “You know how we pretended Santa Claus was real and would do nice things for you if you behaved well? It was a happy little game of ‘let’s pretend,’ and a way to get you to behave the way we wanted you to. Well, God and religion are the same thing.”
(Actually I haven’t had to do that yet. Daughter number 1 decided without prompting that the God story doesn’t make sense. Daughter number 2 is still too young for that discussion.)
I think the other answer is that it’s a bit of fun for kids. They will eventually find out the truth and know that the parents are responsible - I’ve got no problem with them thinking for a few years that someone else chose the present.
Don’t.
Myths are fun…for the parents, too.
I know somebody who has a fond memory from childhood… She says her parents gave her some binoculars, and told her to go outside, look up in the sky and look for Santa.
By the time she came back in the house, Santa had already come and gone,(up the chimney of course) and all the presents were under the tree. Magic!
And 30 years later,the magic worked again, for her kid, too. 
Im rather curious as to just what exactly this “God story” is that doesnt make sense to her?
But in the case of fairy tales it’s usual to make it clear to the kids that those are imaginary stories. If one of your kids told you that he believes there are monsters in their closet, wouldn’t you make a point of explaining that there’s no such a thing? That movies are fiction and Voldemort is not a real person?
Why is Santa Claus exempt from that distinction?
“Why didn’t I get an iPhone 5s from Santa?”
“I don’t know, I guess Santa is just a big, fat dick. Let’s write him a letter and send it to the North Pole.”
This is something I’ve struggled with quite a bit. I never did tell my kids about Santa Claus - they learn it outside the home. They learn it from grandparents and cousins, and then from advertisements and school. They learn it by cultural osmosis, and they are so delighted by it that I don’t feel right bursting their bubble prematurely. What’s the point of that? “Yes, you’ve found wonder and excitement and really cool things, and I’m hear to tell you it’s actually work and suck. Here kid, have a candy cane.”
I’ve handled it by being honest when asked direct questions, but allowing the child to offer their own answers first.
“How does Santa get in if there’s no chimney?”
“That’s a really great question. What do you think?”
If the kid says, “I bet Santa has a magic key” or “Rudolph’s nose is a heat ray that lets him melt the wall and then the elves rebuild it with magic,” or “Mrs. Claus made him a teleporter,” then I know the kid is still exploring magic. They still need it. And so I say, “Wow, that’s a really creative solution; I’ve never thought of that before!”
If the kid says, “I think there’s not really a Santa.” Then I say, “You’re a really smart person, you know that? You’re right, but I’m going to ask you to please not ruin it for the little kids, okay? They need to believe a little longer.”
I don’t think adults need to force fantasy on children, but neither to I think they need to be strict mythbusters. I think it’s part of their natural development, and it will fall away as it’s no longer needed, as long as you provide love and support to replace the safety of story.
But is it, really? And I’m not even trying to be a jerk about it, I honestly want to get to the bottom of this. Why do you think that that belief in magic is a good thing? Why not, say, indifferent, irrelevant? Or even damaging to the kid’s psyche?
There is no obligation to play the game if you don’t want to. Tell the kid the presents are from you.
Of course, you’ll have to explain the Santa Claus myth because the kid will encounter it outside the home. And you might get some pushback from other adults, but so what? The child is your kid, raise him or her however you feel is best.
Because they’ve turned out pretty well.
And also because I’ve studied a lot of child psych, and I think the evidence supports it, and I’ve worked with a lot of kids, and my anecdotal experience supports it. Because I myself have always enjoyed myth, fairy tales, fantasy and science fiction, and I want my kids to have some of the same joys in life I have.
My hypothesis is that fantasy increases neural development by creating lots of cross connections between concepts that are otherwise not easily linked, and that this “excess” neural development can then be put to use when older making creative leaps and “intuitive” insights - although I’d love to see more research in the actual neurology of creativity.
I also think these collective myths, to expand for a moment beyond Santa and to look at fairy tales in general, help us transmit cultural values (for good and for ill) that are important for our kids to learn. They help teach problem solving, they encourage interaction between kids and adults, they teach kids that there are other cultures and other ways of doing things, and that’s okay.
Here’s a decent article written for teachers on the importance of fairy tales: http://nyteachers.wordpress.com/2012/12/04/why-are-fairy-tales-important-for-young-children-by-kayla-kenney-and-melanie-wagner/
Perhaps it is indifferent in effect, as you say. So then there’s literally no harm in it, and I don’t destroy their illusions prematurely because it pleases me to act this way.
If you want me to consider that it may be detrimental, then I’m going to turn it around and ask *you *for the evidence or proposed rationale on that. It’s contrary to both my own experience and the status quo in our culture and most cultures now and historically, which I believe makes it an “extraordinary claim”.
I’m making no claims, other than saying that we should probably know the consequences before doing our actions.
And again, I don’t think that the issue in this thread are fairy tales or myths per se, but the concept of picking one of those myths and actively convincing children of it being factual. For me, the benefits of the former are out of question and not part of what I think the thread is about.
Ok, then I’m not sure why you asked me. I was explicit that I don’t do that. I’m not comfortable outright lying and actively convincing my kids; I may lie by omission, but not by commission. My kids do grow up knowing that when they ask me a straight question, I will answer honestly. That’s as much about my own discomfort with lying as it is their well-being, though.
But you are still defending that lie by omission as a positive. And I’m saying that I don’t really see the leap in logic in that conclusion. What do kids gain by being told, even by omission, that fairy tales are fantasy except for one particular exception?
So you didn’t put presents out Christmas eve? I understand what you are saying, and tend to agree, but it seems like Santa Claus does require some commission, just because otherwise the question you are facing is “So why doesn’t he come to our house?”
My husband was pretty upset about the discovery that he’d been lied to about Santa: he felt betrayed by the adults he most trusted. My big hope is just to not have Christmas ever be that big of a deal: a couple presents, a lot of food. I hope to be able to present Santa as an elaborate game of pretend.
Santa is usually over by six, or earlier: kids are just starting to make that distinction about a lot of fantasy/reality at that point.
Yeah. On the other hand, you could claim that precisely because they are starting to understand the distinction, it’s critically important not to confuse them any more at that juncture.
Again, I don’t claim to be an expert in anything, just saying that we should know what we are doing before doing anything just because it’s “tradition”,
There’s a book that details it quite thoroughly.
True, “Santa” does leave a present at our house. Generally the hard to wrap item. He doesn’t wrap.
Hey, I said I’ve been struggling with this! 
It’s just about over, though. The girlchild is almost 9; I think this years she’s pretending to believe to get extra loot, particularly from her grandmother. Generally speaking, I’m okay with my ambivalence and the entire discussion is more theoretical with each passing year.
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Again, I don’t claim to be an expert in anything, just saying that we should know what we are doing before doing anything just because it’s “tradition”,
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I agree. “Tradition” is not one of the reasons I would give; I’m not particularly a fan of tradition. Providing a common social development experience with her peers, though, that I do find somewhat persuasive, although not enough on its own.
If you do find any studies showing that a belief in Santa leads to worse outcomes, please do let me know.