Books, dust bunnies, maybe Judge Crater. I haven’t looked in awhile.
I’m wondering if anyone has ever done a timelapse underbed movie to find out exactly how dustbunnies form.
A copy of JV Jones’ ‘The Butcher’s Boy’, two vibrators, and a box of Mr Kipling’s mini-Battenberg cakes (exceedingly good, don’t you know).
Leaves from the dining room table, alternate doors from the china cabinet, my mother’s sterling silver flatware, a couple of my husband’s Christmas presents he doesn’t know about, and dog hair.
Mohorovicic Discontinuity and stuff.
Monsters
Under our bed is dog fur, three under-bed storage containers with wrapping paper and other random stuff, and a few pairs of shoes.
Under our son’s bed is apparently a monster which masquerades as toys during the day. “He looks like toys to trick you,” says our son.
A “Shoes Under” storage thingie full of off-season and costume shoes. Which also makes an awesome afternoon naptime bed for Koshi the Orange Kitty. Other than that, dust bunnies, stray socks, and stray cat toys.
It’s my 2 year old St. Bernard chewing on his toys 
My girlfriend. She must have to pee by now. I wish my wife would go back to work.
Carpet, and probably dust.
My sofa. Just moved and everything’s in storage while I find a new place. Usually there’s nothing 'cause it’s a very tall pencil post bed and anything underneath is glaringly obvious (and ugly).
Dead or alive?
You can get lifter blocks to make more space, you know…very handy.
Knives and lint.
Cat hair and dust bunnies
Crummy carpet
Wood floor
Crawl space
Dirt and broken rock
A lotta’ crust
A way lotta’ mantle
Earth’s core
More mantle and crust
Those upside-down guys on the other side
After that it’s just turtles, turtles all the way down.