“Grunka-Lunka-dunkity-darmed-guards.”
Bender: “Shut the hell up!”
I like to start conversations with “Good news, everyone!”
Bender: Who are you and why should I care?
Bender: Hey sexy mama, wanna go and kill all humans?
Morbo, under his breath, while his wife is fussily fixing his tie at a party: “Stop it, stop it, it’s fine, I will destroy you…”
George Takei: I think I’ve done enough conventions to know how to spell ‘Melllvar’.
Fry: It’s like a balloon and then… something bad happens!
Fry: Pssst! Leela, you gotta get me out of here; it’s horrible! Eating scraps, letting my waste drop wherever it falls like an animal in the zoo.
Leela: Animals go in the corner.
Fry: The corner! Why didn’t I think of that!
Leela: Didn’t you have ads in the 21st century?
Fry: Well sure, but not in our dreams. Only on TV and radio, and in magazines, and movies, and at ball games…and on buses and milk cartons and t-shirts, and bananas and written on the sky. But not in dreams, no siree.
Zoidberg: Friends! Help, a guinea pig tricked me!
Amy: Fool me seven times, shame on you. Fool me eight or more times, shame on me.
Documentary Narrator: Fortunately, our handsomest politicians came up with a cheap, last minute way to combat global warming. Ever since 2063, we simply drop a giant ice cube into the ocean now and again.
Suzie: Just like daddy puts in his drink every morning. Then he gets mad.
Documentary Narrator: Of course, because the greenhouse gasses are still building up, it takes more and more ice each time, thus solving the problem once and for all.
“Of course, because the Greenhouse gasses are still building up, more and more ice is needed each time, thus solving the problem once and for all.”
“But–”
“ONCE AND FOR ALL!”
As for lines I use the most in daily life, Hedonismbot would probably be way up there.
“Everywhere I looked, there were piles of bodies. And then the explosion struck!”
“I apologize for nothing!”
“Y’know, that dance wasn’t as safe as they said it was.”
Zoidberg on tranquilizers. “Claaack…”
That is all.
Actually, I thought the last line was all but it wasn’t.
(From the one where Fry gets Leela’s old cryogenics job)
Cryogenics guy: “Welcome to the world of tomorrow!”
Fry: (paraphrasing) “Excuse me, but I was frozen. I think I know what these people want to hear when they wake up.”
[next frozen guy thaws]
Fry (pointing down the hall): “Bathroom’s that way.”
Zap Branigan: "Whatever it is, I’m willing to put wave after wave of men at your disposal. Right, men?
Unseen Man: You suck!
The “wave after wave of my own men” part slays me.
Fry: We have to open his grave.
Bender: sigh I’ll go get my kit.
Professor F.: Everyone’s always in favor of saving Hitler’s brain. But when you put it in the body of a great white shark, oh, suddenly you’ve gone too far!
Soldier: This is the worst part. The calm before the battle.
Fry: And then the battle’s not so bad?
Soldier: Oh, right. I forgot about the battle.
Lrrr: This is ancient Earth’s most foolish program! Why does Ross, the largest Friend, not simply eat the other five?
Roberto: I gotta practice my stabbin’! Hyah! Hyah!
A recent one that cracked me up:
Farnsworth: “WAIT! There’s a snail on the tail of the frog on the bump on this log that I found in a hole in the bottom of the sea!”
Hermes: “Dear Liza!”
Bender: You know I was God once.
God: Yes I saw. You were doing well until everyone died.
He’s a gold mine.
“BLECCCH! These candies are chalky and unpleasant!”
“Drop down! Increase speed! Reverse Direction!”
Am I really the first one to go with “Death by snu-snu!!”
Also, “Bite my shiny metal ass.”
Amy: There, how do I look?
Professor: Like a cheap French harlot.
Amy French?!!
I’m John [bleep]ing Zoidberg!
Agreed.
Although you’d think Lrrr must have noticed that really very few of Earth’s TV programs entail the largest major character eating all the others.
Oh sure, there was the Mary Tyler Moore finale. But still.
Nope. See post #55.