I’ve been watching the complete series of “Ally McBeal”, just released on DVD, and I came upon an episode where Ally’s therapist (played hilariously by Tracy Ullman) tells her to pick a theme song. The only requirements she gives are that it needs to be upbeat, something that can give you a life as you walk down the street, and that it’s something she can play in her head to make her feel better. The therapist chose “Tracy” (HAH!!) by the Cufflinks, and Ally ended up picking The Exciter’s “Tell Him” (after her therapist rejected "Searchin’ My Soul – HAH!!).
I’m not going to be as strict in my requirements though. I was initially going to go with Jobim’s “Waters of March”, as it’s one of my favorite songs, but in the spirit of Ally’s therapist I’m going to have to go with something completely different, the Dollyrots’ “Because I’m Awesome”. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d2pgbjPzF2k
Too many to list. But if I had to pick one, I suppose it would be **AC/DC’s If You Want Blood **- I know, sounds delightful, eh? If you ever saw the obscure movie Empire Records, which had everyone from Robin Tunney, Liv Tyler and Renee Zellweger - when Anthony LaPaglia goes back in his office, gets behind his drum kit and puts on a song to play along to, get pumped up and block out his problems, that’s the song he goes with. For me, it was the song I played before most of my tests in high school, college and grad school to get pumped up. I know - how pathetic is that, getting pumped up before a test?? :smack: but it totally worked.
Mine is Time Out of Mind by Steely Dan. It speaks to my desire to take chances and really live my life. I like the imagery of “chasing the dragon” as a metaphor for going for it.
I steadfastly refuse to give any creedence to the notion that it’s about doing heroin.
For the longest time mine alternated between Jackson Browne’s The Pretender and U2’s I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For. Now, I think it’s When I Said I Do by Clint Black.
Or maybe Jimmy Buffett’s That’s My Story and I’m Stickin’ To It.
Probably either “And Your Bird Can Sing” by the Beatles, or “Lay Down” by the Strawbs. Although “When I Get to the Border” by Richard & Linda Thompson is up there too.
Honestly, something about that song captures the… how should I put this… the chaos, the sense you’re sliding towards the abyss and the branch you’re grabbing might break any moment, the horrifying unpredictability of living with mental illness. You think you’ve got control, but you know in the back of your mind you’re walking a tightrope. Whenever things get worse you tell yourself that you’ve always gotten over these things eventually, but you don’t quite believe it. You worry that there’s a bridge between having a hard time functioning, and not being able to function, and that someday you may lose your mind altogether.
Anyway, when I was going through a tough time last year Disturbia was my theme song. Still goes through my head whenever I’m having one of my bad days.
