I Love Halvsie
CBS, Monday, 8:30–9:00
On tonight’s show, Halvsie Ricardo and Varuna Mertz, his donkey landlord, trick the girls, Karnamoni and Ganga, into applying for jobs crushing grapes at a chocolate factory to make Vitameatavegamin.
Oh, God, this thread is too much. I’m dying here.
No, really …
Hmmmm . . . That’s why we’ve been having so damn much rain in New York—too many donkey weddings!
Channel 7
8:00 - 10:00
Good Golly, Halvsie (1943)
Starring: Halvsie, Karnamoni Handsa (Indira Patel), Elizabeth Taylor (Susan Swanson), Roddy McDowell (Rory O’Rourke), Francis the Talking Mule, and the Ritz Brothers (themselves)
In an effort to raise enough money to save the local leper colony from being closed, Elizabeth Taylor and Roddy McDowell organize a donkey race only to find that instead of riding to victory, the winning jockey (Handsa) has to marry her stead! Halvsie, as the spurned love interest, drinks from the toilet and then falls on the floor and spins around in a circle.
Since the girl is only 9 years old, does that make the dog a pedophile?
But in dog years, she’s 63, well past the age of majority. On the other hand, in human years, they’re both pre-teens (I assume, since he’s a stray). So either way, he should be okay.
Channel 2
10:00 - 11:00
NYPD Halfsie
Starring Halvsie, Dennis Franz, Mark-Paul Gosselaar, Esai Morales, and introducing Karnamoni Handsa as Carnie.
This police drama contains adult language and scenes with partial nudity. Viewer discretion is advised."
As part of an investigation into illegal animal pornography, Detectives Halvsie and Sipowicz find a young girl (Handsa) wandering on the streets of New York. No one will take her in because of her crooked teeth. Det. Halvsie feels sorry for her and takes her to his loft doghouse so she can feel safe. The shower scene with Halfsie and Handsa will raise a few hackles with viewers.
Then Halfsie slips, falls in the shower, and paddles around frantically in a circle.
Makes its own gravy.
Just for those who have joined since the December 2000 debut of Halvsie, the two-legged dog, star of stage and screen, here’s the original thread.
[Donny Osmond]And they called it puppy love[/Donny Osmond]
[Nazareth]Now you’re messin’ with a son of a bitch![/Nazareth]
::d&r::
ABC
Tuesdays
“Eight Simple Rules for Dating My Teenage Doggy.”
Hilarity ensues when you, the reader, make up some typical sitcom plot for me because I’ve never watched this piece of crap.
John Ritter’s career gets down on the floor, spins in circles, and goes nowhere.
No way. You guys are missing the whole story:
Leash to Love
Hilarious hijinks occur when a young bride and her hubby puppy go for a walk. Cats run. Fire hydrants curdle in fear. Trees scream. And it’s all this Wednesday at 8:30PM.
Tripler
I’ve got your formula for the new smash sitcom hit.
http://edition.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/asiapcf/south/06/19/offbeat.india.dog.ap/index.html
I like the caption with the photo. You can just tell the person who did the layout of the page was just panicing with “What photo do I put with this!!??”