Wow, if I hid stuff in that many places 2 thing swould happen:
What little I hide is unimaginatively stashed in the bedroom closet.
Mine is labeled Vacation Photos. I assume no one in their right mind would purposefully subject themselves to someone else’s vacation photos.
I don’t really have anything to hide except sensitive data like tax records, which I keep in a TrueCrypt virtual drive. If I had secrets that need to be kept permanently rather than just indefinitely, I could just make another virtual drive and skip the “second copy of the password in the estate documents” step. (Actually, with TrueCrypt you can set up one drive to have different contents accessed with different passwords; I’d just need to review how to set that up.)
Call me old school. In a wall safe, behind a portrait of the Queen.
I used to keep all my sensitive data on a tiny microchip hidden inside a false tooth, like those used by deep cover secret agents to store a cyanide capsule in case of capture or torture.
Now that I live alone, there’s no need to hide anything. I do make sure to shut the blinds before “enjoying” my Asian porn collection, though – usually. Forgot once or twice. :eek:
Some years ago The Man Show ran an add for the “Rest Assured Disposal Service:” for a fee, they would break into your residence immediately after your death and “sanitize” it, removing items that your family might find disturbing, and even redecorating to give the impression of your having lived an “acceptable” lifestyle.
I’ve got nothing. No porn - I got rid of it years ago when I got a fast internet connection. All my porn browsing is done in a Ubuntu virtual machine. No bookmarks. No history.
No adult toys. No drugs. No diaries with all my secrets. The only thing that might make someone curious is the 3 or 4 bottles of Astroglide I have on hand (so to speak). I buy them five at a time online to save a few bucks, but I imagine that someone who opens the drawer and sees a stash of Astroglide might wonder what goes on that we need so much.
With a small child around, the sex stuff is hidden in a locked chest at the foot of the bed. That’s about as sneaky as we get.
In between the pages of a chick lit novel that is never, ever touched by anyone in the house but me.
The biggest problem for me would be remembering where I hid stuff. This has been an issue for years with Christmas presents.
Here’s a thought, though- your parents might not be as conservative as you think;). The only things these days that are truly private are what’s in your head that you have never disclosed. If I had living parents, I might just leave things in my nightstand to give them a thrill.
Hopefully you have paperwork where it can be readily found- your will, a Living Will/ advanced directives.
I often hide my candy or junk food in the large empty yogurt or cottage cheese containers in the fridge. My husband and teenage son NEVER think to look there. If I don’t hide a little something for myself, it’s gone before I ever had a chance to eat it. I don’t care if someone finds it after I’m gone. I don’t have anything else to hide.
My brother had a heart attack some years ago and was in the hospital for a while. My parents and I stayed at his apartment which was a bachelor pad which apparently mad been hit by a tornado. In order to be comfortable there, we cleaned up and organized. My dear mom who was very proper and unassuming had the job of putting all the DVDs in order on the shelf. She included the porno one we found in the closet right up there with the other regular movies, didn’t bat an eye. So cute.
I live with my father and the only thing I really keep private is my depression meds, which stay in my nightstand drawer. I kind of assume he has looked to see what they are but I pretend he doesn’t know about them.
I don’t have stuff that needs to stay hidden long term, but when I have something like a surprise present I don’t want my son to find I put it in a tampon box if it’s small. If it’s too big for that I surround it with cleaning products in the linen closet.
So far it’s worked every time.
We had to get a safe to keep the kids from stealing our pot.
When I find the keys to my fire safe, I’ll let you know. Two years now and haven’t run across them.
You haven’t really gotten any useful ideas, have you? What about putting yer stuff in a sealed box with a trusted friend, and instructions to just pitch it if the worst happens? Of course, this will have to be a friend who won’t keel over in shock in the likely event they DO open it should something happen to you.
The thought that you need therapy is ridiculous. My BF is under strict orders to hide or dispose of certain things should something happen to me and my Mom is in on clearing out my stuff. It’s a courtesy more than anything.
At one point my best friend and I had an agreement that were either of us to die unexpectedly, the other would come over to the house and burn it down. (After removing the pets.)
I was hiding bad housekeeping, chaos in my personal effects, and a whole bunch of rotten unpublished first drafts. I have no idea what she was hiding.
For some unkown reason, I was my father’s porn disposal guy. Even though the whole family (especially his wife, my mother) had known of his extensive collection for decades. :dubious:
Regarding hiding places, as a sneaky kid, I used to hide my porno mags and weed inside board game boxes. YMMV.
Speaking of hiding places, if it’s paper and can be folded, you can take apart the back of a CD case and the tray the CD sits in and stick things in there.
A brief case full of sex toys on the shelf in the closet, buncha porn DVD’s in a dresser in the same closet (not exactly hidden, since there is nothing else in the dresser), and weed in a jar in a storage bin in same closet. Everything I need in one handy location. I live alone and don’t really need to hide anything, just keep it more or less out of sight. My son comes home every other weekend and during school breaks, but I don’t believe finding any of that stuff would surprise him in the least.
Digital photos and videos I’ve saved on a portable hard drive which lives – you guessed it – in my closet.