Where I pit myself for Parking Lot Rage

[Mtgman]

@MannyL

So I am pitting myself for being an asshold and doing a foolish dangerous thing which nothing good could have come out of it. I could have been injured or worse

MannyL, I want to take a different tack than most have here. I’d like to congratulate you. You have shown personal growth and courage in recognizing and being remorseful over your contributions to the situation. You did the wrong thing in the beginning, but you kept your cool and worked through the right channels to sort out the conflict you had started. Once the police officer arrived you continued to do the right thing by leaving the spot you had no right to and accepting his authority over the situation. It appears you have learned your lesson and have shown that even irrational behavior on the part of multiple parties in a conflict need not lead to injury or criminal proceedings.

It is the rare individual who never acts like an asshole at some point or another. It is the act of a responsible adult to recognize when they have been an asshole and to own up to their share of blame for creating the situation. I trust the lesson has been learned.

Enjoy,
Steven

[Lockseer]

Perhaps why Parking Lot Squatters (PLS) are facing such opposition is that it seems like an inherently selfish act. Here you have a parking lot full of people driving around, looking for spots, and the PLS decides to take his or her own initiative and set off on foot to hunt down the elusive Parking Spot.

“Why is this so bad,” I hear you cry. “Why should I be punished for my ingenuity? Other people have just as much right to do what I do, and I wouldn’t mind.”

Okay, but the thing is…you notice that you’re the only one doing it? You don’t have groups of PDS running around, trying to be the first to claim the spot. While you sit there, hearing the opening bars of whatever band opens for Rick Springfield, do you notice other PLS’s dashing around, frantically looking for a spot to stand in? No. It works for you…but only as long as you are the only one doing it.

The parking lot is not designed for numbers of PLS’s to be running around, cutting in and out of traffic, running to spots. Parking lots are designed for people to walk to and from their spot to the store in question. Plus, due to the inherent nature of parking spots, only one car can fit in at a time. Say you and another PLS dash into a spot. Do you get to arm wrestle to see who stays?

All I’m saying is that, in a world where dozens of cars circle around looking for spots, parking lots work. But if dozens of people are roaming around the lot, doing the same thing, the plan starts to fall apart. Dodging in front of cars to claim spots, drivers trying to beat people on foot (not everyone has a passenger who can claim a spot)…it’s hardly a slippery slope or exaggeration.

Thoughts?

[descamisado]

WARNING: LONG RANT

The following incident happened to me a couple of weeks ago.

I live in New York City and although New Yorkers can be pretty uncivilized, abrasive, agressive, etc., there is one unwritten rule that everybody follows. Well, almost everybody.

You don’t steal a (hard-to-find) parking space someone else clearly has claim to.

After driving a around for about 30 minutes one morning, I finally found a back-in parking space. It was on a street with room for two lanes of traffic. There was a vehicle double-parked opposite the spot (no one inside). As I stopped in front of the spot, I turned on my hazard lights (double blinkers) to signal I was stopping for the spot.

As soon as I stopped, the driver behind me pulled right up on my bumper and started honking. Since there were several cars behind him and I had clearly staked out the spot, I decided to pull up and let them pass.

Big mistake.

The Original King of Assholery™ pulled up and backed into the spot. I immediately pulled over and got out and confronted him. The very fact that he finished parking, got out and walked away without looking me in the face, tells me he knew he was wrong.

In addition to my peaceful imprecations asking him to move, I finally had to remind him that as a fellow African-American, he was a prime example of the disrespect, self-hatred and self-interest that prevent us from coming together as a peole. (Well, not that eruditely – I also suggested he was prime example a certain six-letter word I know).

I do intend to do him evil. I just can’t right now because something is coming up where I’m going to need good karma, but, oh boy, afterwards. (Does karma work that way?)

If anybody wants to know what it I’m going to do, let me know. It’s a doozy. I’m actually going to patent it.

Although I was fuming, to my credit, when I found a parking space about five minutes later, a young lady asked me for a battery charge and I, retaining my usual good nature, obliged.

[Trunk]

@Lockseer

Thoughts?

An excellent way of saying rationally what I was just spouting off on.

On top of what you said. . .

The PLS also has an unfair advantage over the person with kids in their car (who they can’t send to squat themselves) or the person driving solo who could possibly be indefinitely shut out of spots were the PLSs allowed to operate on a large scale.

If it catches on, ultimately you’re going to have to make up regulations about it, and put up signs in the garage about it, the costs of which will ultimately be passed onto all of us.

There’s a lot of things in daily life that operate sufficiently well without excessive rules and regulations. Without fail, someone comes along who sees the loophole and wants to “get one over on the system” and hides behind, “show me where it’s written that you can’t do that.”

[MelCthefirst]

@5-4-Fighting

If anybody wants to know what it I’m going to do, let me know. It’s a doozy. I’m actually going to patent it.

What are you going to do - I love hearing revenge stories.

[spinky]

@Lockseer

What it boils down to is a Mexican Standoff ultimately arbitrated by the degree to which one is a Rick Springfield fan.

And when you put it that way, there’s a lot more than a parking space at stake. The loser has to admit to being the bigger Rick Springfield fan. Talk about a punishment.

Your insight about what would happen if two people tried to save the same spot is a good one, too. Another question is how late before you pull in the spot is it ok for a squatter to leap into it and yell “I called it! It’s my spot because I called spotsies!” If you get halfway into the spot, but they’re able to weasel in from the other side, are you prevented from continuing?
Here’s my idea for dealing with them if I’m in a particularly belligerent mood. I’m driving my truck, and I’ve got a passenger. I attempt to pull in a spot, but Manny is standing there doing a superior dance. I say to my passenger, “take the wheel and pull into the spot slowly. You may have to bump into me.” Then I get out, get between Manny and the front of the truck, and I start pushing him. Every inch I gain, the truck moves forward with me. The truck even helps me a little. Heck, maybe I could just sit on the hood and push, so long as it’s me that touches him and not the truck.

He’d probably claim I assaulted him, and I’d gladly admit to the cops that I pushed him out of the way because he was standing in a parking spot. No jury would convict me.

[descamisado]

@MelCthefirst

What are you going to do - I love hearing revenge stories.

I would like to smear dogshit underneath all of his door handles. I know I probably won’t but it’s nice to fantasize. (Or, maybe I will – ja know how long it would take to get the smell of dogshit off our hands?)

[Mtgman]

@ntucker

He’d probably claim I assaulted him, and I’d gladly admit to the cops that I pushed him out of the way because he was standing in a parking spot. No jury would convict me.

I’d reprase that last bit. I’d say that most juries would be sympathetic, but this situation would fit the crime of assault in most jurisdictions. The judge typically instructs the jury that they are bound to apply the law, not their own emotional reaction. After reading the legal definition of assault and the account of the situation(as you have written it) it would be a jurors civic duty to note that indeed the behavior was correctly categorized as assault. Therefore they have a duty to vote guilty. They may think the law is a bunch of crap and should have an exception for people who assault assholes trying to reserve parking spaces, but short of jury nullification I’d put at least even money on a conviction based on how the scenario was written.

Here’s what I don’t understand. For those who believe it would be an acceptable course of action to forcibly remove, with the aid of the vehicle or not, a “squatter” can I ask if you’ve thought about the cost/benefit? Obviously the benefit is you get the space and the free time that you would otherwise spend looking for another one(quite possibly further from the destination). The cost is possible criminal charges, being arrested and jailed for a day or so even if the charges don’t come through, a significant risk of vandalism to the vehicle you’ve left behind, or escalation of the violence where they resist your attempts to move them and a real fight breaks out with all the risks, legal and physical, involved there. Is a parking space worth it? Is the greater cause of stamping out this behavior at every opportunity worth it? I just don’t understand taking this aggressive stance when it seems you have much more to lose than to gain.

Enjoy,
Steven

[Walton_Firm]

@Mtgman

I just don’t understand taking this aggressive stance when it seems you have much more to lose than to gain.

And that’s exactly what bullies, assholes and small-fry criminals count on: the fact that, for every individual victim, the cost of doing something about their assholish behaviour is not worth the gain, and it’s easier to just shrug it off and let them win.

It’s a kind of Prisoner’s Dilemma. If everybody took a vow to never let assholes get away with their assholery, even at the cost of some personal inconvenience and even danger, there would be soon be very few assholes and therefore it would be very rare that you’d actually need to make good on your vow. On the other hand, if the assholes could be certain that nobody would ever stand up to them, assholery would be a risk-free business and becoming an asshole would be a rational choice.

By answering Manny’s assholery with his own, Manny’s antagonist basically made a personal sacrifice to the greater good of society. He incurred some inconvenience, risked getting into a violent situation, and risked legal trouble because formally he was in the wrong. But on the other hand, Manny has now learned a valuable lesson, and will hopefully be a better citizen from now on. Can we really say, then, that it wasn’t worth the cost? Wouldn’t society be a better place if we were all willing to “take one for the team” a little more often?

[Lockseer]

@Martin Wolf

But on the other hand, Manny has now learned a valuable lesson, and will hopefully be a better citizen from now on. Can we really say, then, that it wasn’t worth the cost? Wouldn’t society be a better place if we were all willing to “take one for the team” a little more often?

Dear God in heaven…this is going the route of the Antagonizing Tailgaters thread. If you combat assholish behavior with assholish behavior, then how exactly does the person feel taught a lesson? They just think you’re an asshole, too, and are likely to retaliate further. It escalates things, doesn’t solve them.

1. Squatting in a Parking Spot = Assholery

2. Assaulting Someone (Ever) = Assholery

Is physically moving someone from a parking spot assault? That’s another issue…but using your CAR to do it? Crikey…think a little!

“Doing something” about the situation doesn’t mean you need to physically confront the problem. Instead, I’d inch my car into the spot (so that the squatter’s car could very obviously not make it in) and just wait it out. If assholery on the part of another lands me in trouble with the law…the asshole won.

Long story, short (too late): Assholery doesn’t nullify assholery. It’s a multiplicative (hell, exponential) factor.

[Mtgman]

I’m not saying people should roll over. If you want the parking space there is a perfectly legitimate means of getting it. Notify the authorities and let them remove the pedestrian in carland. This has all kinds of side benefits. Odds are the police will get ID from the person so if you come back later and your car is keyed they can track them down for questioning, or at least provide documentation for you to use to show the insurance company when you put in a claim for the damages. Also it avoids any legal implications for yourself. Heck, even the threat of calling the authorities is usually enough to get the bullies, assholes, and small-fry criminals to back off. So why resort to taking the matter into your own hands instead of just picking up a phone or saying “honey, put it in park here for a minute(halfway into the space, or at least blocking it) while I run get the attention of the carpark attendant or security officer.”

Enjoy,
Steven

[MannyL]

I have read everyone’s opinion on what I did. While I understand that what I did was wrong I don’t consider it as being an asshole. I admit I put myself at risk of injury if the passenger did not show the restraint he did, but one piece of information I failed to include because I did not want to cloud anyone’s decisions was the passenger who I am assuming was his wife, wanted to leave the sport and find another but he (the passenger) would not let her.

I’m not going to make a post supporting what I did as being right because it was not and I was a jerk.

[zweisamkeit]

@MannyL

I have read everyone’s opinion on what I did. While I understand that what I did was wrong I don’t consider it as being an asshole. I admit I put myself at risk of injury if the passenger did not show the restraint he did, but one piece of information I failed to include because I did not want to cloud anyone’s decisions was the passenger who I am assuming was his wife, wanted to leave the sport and find another but he (the passenger) would not let her.

I’m not going to make a post supporting what I did as being right because it was not and I was a jerk.

If you really, really wanted that spot, why didn’t you just follow them in the car? Then your car would be the first one to have dibs to the spot and none of this would’ve happened.

That’s my problem. If you wanted the parking spot so bad, you should’ve just gone with the car, instead of you going with them and having your friend with the car go in search of another spot. That, to me, is trying to have your cake (a ‘given’ spot by following them) and eating it, too.

[MannyL]

@zweisamkeit

If you really, really wanted that spot, why didn’t you just follow them in the car? Then your car would be the first one to have dibs to the spot and none of this would’ve happened.

That’s my problem. If you wanted the parking spot so bad, you should’ve just gone with the car, instead of you going with them and having your friend with the car go in search of another spot. That, to me, is trying to have your cake (a ‘given’ spot by following them) and eating it, too.

They had said their car was along the back wall so I was going ahead to point my friend to it.

             Lot Entrance ->   A  |------------------------------------------------|
                                            |                    |              |                        |
                                            |                    |              |                        |
                                            |                    |              |                        |
                                            |                    |              |                        |
                                            |                    |              |                        |
                                            |                    |              |                        |                                          |Space kind person was in  |D                    |              |                        |
                                            |                     |              |                       |
                                            | ----------------------------C--------------B---|
                                                                                                    ^
                                                                               ^                    |
Where we were when I asked about space          - |                    |
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        
                                     Where the people leaving came from      -|

A=Lot In/Out
B=Where people walked into lot from pedestrian exit
C=Where we were when I asked if they were leaving and if we could have their space
D=Where their car was parked

Traffic flows in at A makes a right, makes a left then can either go up the middle lane to second level or turn left at end lane to circle back aroune to top of lot where you turn left to head back to exit/first lane.

[CanvasShoes]

@Nametag

Because people can’t be parked, dumbass, …Honestly, I don’t know why this is so hard to grasp.

It’s really not necessary to be so nasty about it. Curiosity and a request for further clarification does not denote lack of intelligence.

As I clearly explained, I generally park in parking spaces on the outskirts of the parking lot, or in odd areas anyway, so I’m not asking for a blessing on the practice for MYSELF here.

And as I also clearly explained, where I live, I’ve not seen it looked on badly by other motorists and I’ve seen it happen a number of times. Mostly at the state fair, where the grass field parking lot is a huge pain in the butt, but in store parking lots from time to time as well.

[TheLoadedDog]

@5-4-Fighting

I would like to smear dogshit underneath all of his door handles. I know I probably won’t but it’s nice to fantasize. (Or, maybe I will – ja know how long it would take to get the smell of dogshit off our hands?)

Mate, ya just go down to your local South-East Asian grocery and pick up some fish sauce - preferably Thai Squid Brand, but any will do. A quick squirt in the air intake vents around the windshield will do wonders. The inside of the car will be uninhabitable for weeks.

And you’ll have a near-full bottle of fish sauce as a bonus. It’s actually nice stuff.

[CanvasShoes]

@TheLoadedDog

Mate, ya just go down to your local South-East Asian grocery and pick up some fish sauce - preferably Thai Squid Brand, but any will do. A quick squirt in the air intake vents around the windshield will do wonders. The inside of the car will be uninhabitable for weeks.

And you’ll have a near-full bottle of fish sauce as a bonus. It’s actually nice stuff.

Nah nah nah…

You want to get some bear bait. Preferably stuff that’s been out in the woods already for several months. This is the most putrid, heinous substance known to man.