Considering Occam’s Razor, I agree with your conclusion.
So how do we know if we’re in the “good portion”?
Can you send out postcards or something? Thanks. We do need time to plan, you know.
(I think if you divided the world into good and bad portions, I’d be in the good…)
If I haven’t ever called you a “fucking retard,” you’re probably in the clear.
Probably.
Dear In-Laws,
I am so glad that you took the occasion of my father-in-law’s funeral (when emotions are running high and people say/do stupid shit) to decide that my daughter is a misbehaving wild child (she’s not, although I’ll allow she has a mouth and sometimes speaks before she thinks, but she’s 17 after all, duh), and that because I don’t know how to raise her properly, neither she nor I are allowed to visit the matriarch’s house any more - indefinitely.
And anyway, Matriarch wasn’t even present when my daughter said something out of turn (that she doesn’t even remember saying) which was overheard by one of the aunts/uncles. So who made the decision that we’re not allowed? Matriarch or one of her children who are backstabbing character assassins who probably simply don’t like that my husband married a Yankee city girl.
Oh, and darling Spouse, it’s SO nice of you to explain to us how we are wrong and if we’d just apologize (For what? Raising my child the way I see fit? Saying something off-the-cuff and not even remembered?) it would all be better now. I like that SO much better than your not standing up for us to those who banned us (whoever “they” are) in fear that you, too, will be banned.
I can’t say any of this to you, since you’re dealing with the fact that your father has died, but damn, I’m pissed off, and really wish on the topic of family you’d get your head out of your (their?) ass.
Dear DMV:
If you are not going to accept paper insurance ID cards printed from the net, then I suggest you note that on your renewal notice. Or on your website. Or on a sign in your lobby.
You know what sucks? To get all the way thru the line, check written, only to be told that Geico has to fax you my insurance card. You know what also sucks? Some of us don’t have a cell phone to call Geico right then and there. Do YOU have a phone I could use?
You don’t?
Lovely. I guess I’ll drive all the way back to my office and call them, then.
Also, please tell your landlord that repaving the parking lot on the last Monday of the month, thereby closing a third of the spaces in front of the DMV, is a really fucking retarded thing to do.
Fuckers.
I get really, really annoyed and a little bit hurt when people in the office make coffee runs for each other and don’t ask me if I’d like anything. One of these people is my boss, and two of these people are ladies that’s I’ve done coffee runs for a number of times with no reciprocation. Mine were out of my own pocket while they can run it as a ‘business expense’.
I think I might actually say something to my boss this time. Maybe.
My cat continues to pee over the side of her litter box. I don’t think it’s any kind of protest thing; she just has really terrible aim. She hangs her butt over the side of one of three boxes we have down there and just lets fly. She also never buries her crap (she scratches at the wall beside the boxes or just in the air or doesn’t bother scratching at all). She is a “fail” at litter box. 
Ooh, I’m totally with you on that. If it was a bland white cake with bland Cool Whip, I wouldn’t care (since I’d have a bite and give the rest to my husband since I don’t waste calories on white cake), but lemon cake? That needs a sweet buttery frosting.
I hate to look a gift cake in the mouth, but I’m kinda picky with birthday cakes (I hate ice cream cakes, too).
Guess what I’m hungry for now? 
Pie?
Damned neighbors setting off roman candles AGAIN. It’s a good thing the AC’s on, other wise the smoke would come right inside my window. The dog’s going nuts, and I don’t even think they’re legal in PA.
(They BETTER not be setting them off tonight. Fuckers)
Maybe you should become a “Cat Yeller”.
Can I slip a gloat in here with the rants?
Our office is located in a small office building. There are just seven units spread over three floors. The landlord (who is also the tenant of one of the offices) has been unhappy because one of the units has gone unrented for over a year now. He was always bitching about it at his office manager who also served as the rental manager for the building.
Now, everybody except him knows it wasn’t her fault. This area has way too much office space for the current economy, as anyone who looked around would have to know. Hell, there are five other office buildings I know of within a one mile radius with “space for rent” signs on them. Plus this building is older than most of those, and simply doesn’t have all the amenities and ‘newness’ renters can insist on in this market. Plus the rents here ($23 per sq.ft.) are on the high end of the region’s scale.
The office manager is a lovely woman, but she can’t overcome older AND more expensive AND worse aesthetics, you know? Frankly I’m amazed the building is as full as it was.
So landlord goes out and four months ago hires a high powered rental manager to remedy the situation. Paying her, apparently, a great salary and simultaneously demoting the nice woman AND cutting her salary because, you know, she ‘wasn’t up to the job.’
The new manager is a total bitch. Her emotional range goes from hostile to insanely hostile. Saying ‘good morning’ to her can earn you a blistering lecture on what a bad tenant you are because one of your clients parked in the wrong area. Seriously.
She’s had the owner spending a ton of money sprucing up the building. Some on projects that were needed (repaving the parking lot, replacing the worn carpets in the common ares) but a huge amount went to completely redoing the landscaping. Which meant cutting down TWENTY huge oak trees and filling in the space with a zillion small shubs and annuals. (Including, btw, over 70 hostas. Which are now slowly dying because, guess what? When you cut down all the trees the grounds are no longer shady! Hostas do not do well in full sun, idiot.)
Anyway. Six weeks ago Bitch sent around a letter saying the landlord would no longer ‘let us take advantage’ of him by paying ‘such low’ rents, and starting on Aug 1 our rents will go up by over 20% to be ‘more fair.’
Riiiiiight.
Guess what? Tomorrow is moving out day for one of the tenants. Another goes on Wednesday. We’ve given notice, we’ll be out by the end of July. And today I learned from a secretary at yet another of the offices that her boss is signing the lease on a new place this Friday.
Yep. She’s taken a building that had 5 of the 6 available units rented and in just four months turned it into a building with just ONE tenant (besides the owner.)
Way to go, Manager Bitch! I wonder how big a bonus you’ll get for that?
Stupid fucking greedy self-entitled customers.
“I read on a message board that your company is giving away free stuff”
That is not true.
“I think you’re wrong. I want free stuff”
We’re not giving away free stuff.
“What is your name? Let me talk to your manager! I demand free stuff”
No, you can’t speak to my manager, we’re not giving things away.
“I demand to speak to someone else. You’re not helping me. Give me free stuff right now or I’m going to write a letter of complaint to your company. You’re just messing with me! Get your boss on the line right now!”
You know bitch, I got better things to do than to mess with someone on the phone. If we were giving away free shit, I’d be glad to give it to you. BUT WE ARE NOT. So fuck off you parasite.
Ooh, StarvingButStrong, that’s a special way of doing business.
Oh, yeah. I bet I know what she was thinking: I haven’t been able to find someone to rent the sixth unit, but if I get 20% more from each of the other five tenants it’ll come to the same amount of money… Brilliant, no?
Okay, Pinkeye, time for you to go. I hate you, you’re annoying, and you’re getting in my way. I need to be able to see, and to do that I need to be able to put my contacts in. So BUZZ OFF!! I’ve had enough of your gunky self.
I hope you send a copy of your rant to the landlord.
Fuck you ‘Die Tradition Des Gregorianischen Chorals’.
You started out life as a four CD set, but when you moved to HD/iTunes, you became 6 or 8 or some ungodly number of albums, all with the same none-too-beautiful cover.
You know, just in general, fuck classical music CD’s.
Your naming conventions suck.
While I’m at it, Fuck you iTunes album definition, and iTunes technical manual[sup]*[/sup]. Why must I intuit your album definition, and why must I edit multiple pages, auf Deutsch, via your single snivelling editing window? You are a pain in the ass!
[sup]*[/sup] As if there were such a thing.
Why does someone throw their life away by gunning down police officers when whatever crime they committed isn’t likely to have earned them the death penalty? Now they’ll be lucky to even get taken into custody alive. Stupid!
We have a simple system of footers to track documents. So (a) why isn’t there one on this fucking MCA, of all things, and (b) why does nobody involved in creating it seem to have a copy of the final version?
Looks like you answered your own question there.