I’m constructing a scene in the book I’m writing, and I have two scenarios in mind and am wondering which one people would find to be more upsetting/disturbing/etc. So, I consult you, teeming squillions.
The story is about a teenage female murderer named Linneah. During the story, it comes out that she’s pregnant, but she does not have the baby before the end of the story proper. These scenarios are for the little epilogue at the end, when the kid, whose name is Adrian, is about three.
Scenario 1: Linneah is dragging Adrian through a deserted public park at dusk. He’s whining, trying to escape, doesn’t want to go, etc. She is trying to calm him by telling him about his father (her former accomplice, who is now dead), how much she loved him, etc. They come to a secluded area and she tells him that she is sorry they couldn’t have gone to his father’s grave for this, but it’s in the town when she committed her murders, and she might get caught there. She then pulls away a piece of turf to reveal a hole she has previously dug, and quickly buries the child in it, packing the dirt around him and laying beside the hole, expressing…errr…obvious sexual pleasure at the sound of his muffled screams as he dies. (Note that the sexual element is not really a surprise here…all her murders involved her being sexually excited by hurting and killing people, so the only twist here is that it involves her own child)
Scenario 2: We see Linneah and Adrian at home, in a sordid, crappy apartment. She has come home from the menial job she is forced to do to support them, and he is being three, basically – tugging on her, annoying her with questions, etc. She tells him he had better stop, but he keeps on, and she says “okay, that’s it” and straps him into his highchair, where she proceeds to cut his arms and legs with a razor blade (this was an element in all her murders) The scene fades on him crying out, “No, Mommy, no, stop it, it hurts” or something like that.
Even though the second one doesn’t involve the death of the child, I wonder if it’s not worse because you can imagine what the poor little boy’s life must be like, and how it will be in the future, if this is her parenting style. Anyway, I’m interested in what a bunch of people who don’t know me think is the more upsetting of these two situations, were they to encounter them in a book.
Thanks for any feedback in advance