Guess you weren’t as drunk as I was, Ginger because I don’t remember it all! 
Seriously, though, you’re right about what you said (in the parts that I snipped out). We place too much emphasis on sex. I know all the crap I heard about it screwed me up! (My parents sex advice consisted of: “Keep that thing in your pants. Sex is NBD.” All I could think was: “Easy for you to say. You can have sex any time you want.”)
Understood. And you are on the cusp of adulthood, but your attitude is still a good one to have. The time will come when your respect for you is the important thing. If you can do it and still respect yourself, that’s what’s important. Right now the 'rents are an important consideration. I’m just saying that that will not always be true. When that point comes, do as you see best for you. Big secret: You parents will have to accept you as an adult when you become one. It may be hard for them, but ultimately, it’s YOU you have to be concerned about.
My friends are mostly a clean-cut group; premarital sex, alcohol, tobacco, etc. are generally forwned upon. So that might be part of it. All the same, I get the impression from the guys I’ve talked to (not all of whom are so straight-laced) that it’s okay for a girl not to be a virgin, but that they would never marry a girl who’d slept with other men. I haven’t heard the same attitude from females regarding future husbands; it’s pretty much assumed that most guys won’t wait that long.
So, it seems to me that there’s still a code of good girls don’t, but real men do. The stigma against male virgins does seem much more prominent, though.
I wonder how our society would be different if we could just eliminate the word “virgin.”
FUB, I back you up on your wish. I respect my parents and never want to let them down. When I do, I feel really guilty and then never try to do whatever it was again. I totally understand your way of thinking. Even if I haven’t had a chance to have intercourse, if I did or do, I will use what my parent’s taught me: that I have dignity and self-worth. Don’t let yourself down. It may feel great at the moment, but won’t afterward.
Just my $.02.
These guys are sleezeballs, IMHO! Grrrrrr. I get so pissed off when I hear things like this that I want to beat them to a bloody pulp! This is utter crap! Okay, I was nineteen when I lost my virginity, I didn’t have a clue as to who I was or what I wanted to be, so even if I had lost my virginity to someone I cared about, it doesn’t mean that when I figured out who I was and what I wanted to do with my life (still trying to figure it all out, BTW) that the person I slept with would be the person for me to spend the rest of my life with! This is stupid, barbaric thinking, and should in no way influence how you live you life. If you only want to have sex with one person, good for you! If you want to nail anything that moves, good for you, too! (Just take precautions, and if you’re female, could I have your number? ) And if you fall somewhere in between: Good for you, too!
Bullshit. Here’s a suggestion, start hanging out with adults, not children. I’m an adult male, and any potential partner’s past is just that-past. As is mine. We ( the hypothetical Ms and I) might discuss it, but only as a point of background. What is important is what we build together. That is an adult relationship.