Honestly? I dunno. First time I laid eyes on her, I thought, “I want some of that!”. Two seconds later, followed by, “Who the fuck do you think you’re kidding, she’s way out of your league”.
Fast forward a few hours, turns out I was wrong about the latter. And I really don’t know why. But, it’s worked for nigh 8 years now, married for 5+, and she moved halfway 'cross the globe for me. I’ve stopped wondering why, and started to just enjoy it. 
There are those who look at our relationship and wonder why my boyfriend would be interested in someone who is clearly not as ‘hot’ as he is. (For the duration of our relationship I have been significantly overweight.) And while we both agree that I would feel better if I weighed less*, I find in our case that my weight is beside the point of what makes us work so well together.
*I have lost some and am over 25% of the way towards my overall goal.
This is hard to answer, because my fiancé’s personality makes him so much hotter to me.
Me: Female, 28
I guess I’d say I’m a 7.5.
He’s a 7, strictly in looks.
Not a huge difference I suppose. We’ve never had any problems, though his friends often bug him - “how’d such an ugly guy get a hot chick” type stuff.
And I’m surprised no one is asking for pictures! Here’s ours.
Female, age 41 and I doubt I have ever looked better (except for the boobs getting a bit out of shape)
I am a solid 8, maybe 9 (or so I am told)
He is a 6 or 7
Nah, no big deal
Damn it you people, I want to see pictures!
I think we’re equally homely; but he’s more book smart mathwise, I’m more practical/streetsmart and wordwise. We’re very Yin/Yang.
You tell me, but I’m gonna go ahead and say her.
We’re both pretty cute, I think. The actual rating would depend on who you ask, no doubt. I always find threads about physical atractiveness fascinating–who people think are good looking often clash with my perceptions, which is awesome: someone for everyone.
He looks hotter with a beard, but is in the military which limits that. This is a pretty good photo of us together.
Funnily enough, we were just talking about this the other day. We agreed that on an usual, average day, we’re both about a 7. On our good days, if we really make an effort, we can push that up to an 8. On slobby, lazing-round-the-house, not-going-to-see-anyone-but-each-other days, we’re more like 5 - 6s - not winning any beauty contests, but not going to make anyone recoil in horror either.
Photo - admittedly one taken on a day when we could both be said to have made more of an effort…
She is. Runs the air conditioner all the damned time, too.
some interesting responses here. I note that there is a pretty strong tendency for a person to rate their partner hotter than themself.
This could be due to the bias I mentioned in the OP, but it occurred to me that many people may naturally think their partner is more attractive than they themselves are. Perhaps that even plays a role in the success of the relationship – both parties think they are getting the better deal.
So it would be interesting to hear from some Doper couples to see if each partner’s rating agrees with the other.
:rolleyes: Fine. Whatever.
We broke up three weeks ago. We met the other night for a drink and the feelings are still there.
sigh Maybe I should just give in and marry her. After all, happiness isn’t everything.
He looks like a dork. You should leave him immediately.
And then you need to send me your phone number. And a list of your ticklish spots.
I think my husband is HANDSOME with a capital H, but this sort of thread is sorta amusing, since he and I are both on the backhill slope of attractiveness, age-wise. He’s 57 and I’m 46, so you know we’re not particularly hottie material. Here’s us about six years ago, right before we got married, c. 2003 I don’t appear to have anything more current of the both of us!
Now, he’s a little grayer and I’ve put on a few pounds. 
I’d say simply on aesthetics, though, he’s better looking. If you take a look at genetics, his parents were both extremely good looking when they were young; his mother in fact was the homecoming queen of her school in 1947-ish. 
My side: average joes and janes!
Hm, here’s one of me by myself (at work) and another of him at work. Eh.
Female.
I’m going to generously award myself a 6.5.
Husband I’m not so sure about. When I first met him, I actually didn’t think he was attractive at all, but over time his looks have grown on me. I know a lot of other women find him attractive as well, but I’m not sure how much can be chalked up to intelligence or charisma. He’s got me way outranked in that department.
Us dressed up: http://www.flickr.com/photos/7428938@N08/1041314111/
Us not dressed up: http://www.flickr.com/photos/7428938@N08/3025431934/
what is your gender?
Male
how do you rate your own physical attractiveness on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being hottest)
Over time, 7.5. Right now, 5. I’ve kinda picked up this beer belly thing and I’m not sure what county agency I need to call to get them to come and take it away.
how do you rate your partner?
8
if there is a large difference, has this ever been an issue with either of you?
No- both of us think we’re fighting above our weight classes, which is pretty awesome I guess.
1. what is your gender?
Male
2. how do you rate your own physical attractiveness on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being hottest)
Maybe a 6 when I was young, a 4 now? I never had a huge problem getting dates but I rarely got hit on either.
3. how do you rate your partner?
9.8 when very young (I’ve seen pictures), 9.3 when we marrried, 7.6 on the absolute scale, now that we are old. Still a 9.8 “for her age”. She could be a cougar if she wanted.
4. if there is a large difference, has this ever been an issue with either of you?
Not really. It is obvious that her ex still has a thing for her 25 years later. Once her boss wanted her to drop everything and move to the islands with him … Would have been a problem if she had considered it. Every now and then a friend feels the need to tell me my wife is hot … that’s sort of uncomfortable in a cool sort of way.
