Depends on what you mean by “single”. I’ve been in several ongoing companionable relationships and I’m in one now, but I am not now, have never been, and never will be a party to the thing called “marriage”.
godzillatemple, please see my previous post, and please keep your unhelpful stories to yourself.
I thought I had things going good for me about a 2 years ago - hit the 4 year mark on a relationship that would only last 6 months longer.
I was completely in love with this woman. Trusted her with everything. She betrayed and destroyed my trust by cheating on me. I, stupidly enough, forgave her. I was dumped 3 months later.
To this day, a year and a half later, I trust no woman with anything more then a ‘Hello’ and a distant friendship. My an occasional Bed Buddy (Which I’ve found to be highly uncomfortable and non-conducive to a lasting friendship).
I can’t say for sure that I’m going to be single for the rest of my life… but I know it won’t kill me to be that way.
And I’m only 23.
I wish I could have a bed buddy…
By the time I hit 33, I was fine with the fact that I wasn’t married and never would be. BUT, along came Mr. Right. We fell in love, married 2 years later, and divorced 10 years after that. So I’ve had it all. And I’ll stay single, thank you very much. My only fear is growing old alone, but a bunch of my friends (all single, never married) and I have decided we’re buying land in Kentucky and all living together after we retire. With horses and dogs.
Hey…if it was up to me, I would spend my entire life acting like a 23 year old, drinking and partying with my friends and picking up strange anonymous girls in bars and clubs and parties whenever I was horney. I would never hear the sound of whining, screaming kids. Never get dragged to a Broadway musical (unless it was produced by Jerry Bruckheimer and directed by Michael Bay). I would never have to go “antiqueing” or have to hold a purse while my SO goes shoe shopping. The only Sandra Bullock movies I would ever watch would be Speed or Demolishion Man. The only time I would see Reece Witherspoon would be in American Psycho. My appartment would be filled with lots of oak and steel and electronics and neon and animal heads. Basically, I would live my life like a cross between a Budweiser commercial and a P Diddi video (but with mostly white chicks… sorry that’s just how I likes em).
If you are under 31, that is pretty much how you should be living your life. That’s what I think of when I think of being “single”
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Problem is, it sounds like a lot of people aren’t single:cool:, they are single:( . They aren’t having fun or going out or dating or meeting people. They are sitting at home watering their plants or feeding their 10 cats wondering why they are alone and curing the world because they are too shy.
So…if you are single:cool: because you are having too much fun being single, that’s great. If you are single:( because you are a social imbecile, get some help.
This 24 year old is completely serious. I do not want for offspring. I have yet to see a marriage where, if I were in it, I would want to remain in it. My mom is on husband #4, my dad just got engaged to what will be wife #3. I’ve seen the crap they’ve been through with the divorces and all. I just don’t buy into any of it anymore.
Maybe another will find that depressing. I prefer to think of it as early enlightenment.
My dad did that with wife #2. She and her kids moved into our house for about 2 years after they got married. Eventually, she went and got her own place and they did that for another 7 or so years. Eventually got divorced though. He blames her, she blames him. Why get married in the first place?
Methinks thou dost presume too much.
I can only speak for myself (obviously). But I have tried. Lord, how I have tried. I have paid ungodly amounts of money to dating services for them to find me my Perfect Match™. I have asked my friends to hook me up, only to get offers of, “Hey, you should date her. She has great tits!” or “But she’s so nice! You’ll get along great!” when I already know her and also already know that we have less than 0.01% in common.
In case you still don’t believe me, read this thread.
Hmm, I have a pretty good shot at staying single. Mid-40’s, long time since my last long term relationship, no prospects in sight, and I rather enjoy living alone. Not averse to a relationship, it’s just that those people who say “Do what you enjoy doing and you’ll find someone” should be advised that this is not an infallible recipe for meeting people.
I will respond to msmith537 ( “Problem is, it sounds like a lot of people aren’t single (happy), they are single (unhappy) . They aren’t having fun or going out or dating or meeting people.”) that going out constantly isn’t everyone’s idea of a good time. And frankly, once you’re in your mid-30’s, who the hell has the energy?
I thought about this thread today, because I’m contemplating buying a real impractical car with only two seats and absolutely no room in the trunk. But then I thought: “Well, it’s not like you’re ever going somewhere with luggage AND someone.”
I’ve been in one semi-serious relationship once in my life and I am 30. Up to now, I figured that that was because I was just picky and there was no guy that would fit my requirements. But ONE DAY Mr. Right would come along. People kept telling me so.
So I was living my single life rather happily. Until I met the guy who fit every single point I ever put on my imaginary list (even the pretty unlikely ones). There he was! Mr. Perfect, yay! (no, he wasn’t perfect, but that was the beauty of it).
Don’t start getting all huffed up, yet, Eve!!!
Because, alas, he wasn’t interested, and is currently dating a really screwed-up 20 year old (and I’m not saying that out of jealousy, that’s how it is). The main part though was that he wasn’t interested. Not even slightly.
So what I am looking at is that I found 2 guys in 30 years, one of them was semi-OK, and one OK, and of the two, one didn’t like me. Not such a good outlook for the next 30 years. (I ain’t getting any hotter either. Not that I was that hot to begin with).
I’m just trying to regain my state of contentedness again. It’s hard. And yeah, I second that you please shut up about “It’s just a matter of time…I was thinking like you…yadda yadda yadda.” I can’t hear it anymore. Thank you, Eve. (By the way, if I was a guy, I’d marry you in a heartbeat, legal or not. 
)
But maybe the car will raise my spirits. It’s just like I want my men - small and fast and shiny…ahem…well, not quite, but you get the picture.
So, don’t get married. I usually wish I hadn’t.
There’s a world of difference between “being single” and “not being married.” I don’t consider some to be “single” if they’re in a relationship, even if it’s one of a few weeks. I want to be in a relationship myself. I don’t pine for marriage again, not right now at least.
The reason I consider myself an “agnostic” in this field is because I don’t think anyone knows what’s going to happen in their life twenty, ten, even five years down the road. When I first started posting here on the SDMB only three years ago, I was living in Oxford, England, married, and determined to be a history professor. Turn the clock forward three years, and I am living in a small town in New York state I’d never even heard of three years ago, divorced, and determined to not be a history professor. Our life is determined by random events of chance that we hope we have control over but often don’t.
I am not saying that, yeah, everyone in this thread will find someone. I know that doesn’t happen in reality. And if one is sufficiently determined, yes, one can be single for the rest of one’s life. But there are no guarantees in life, for good or bad.
Yep, count me in also. I’m 39, divorced. Been there, done that, used the tee shirt as a dust rag already. I wouldn’t say it’s impossible, just really damn unlikely. It’s odd how so many people in relationships overstate how great they are, and people who are single overlook the advantages. Besides, I don’t want anyone around to fill my place with their crap and or touching my stuff.
One more 40 yr old checking in.
I am all for serial monagamy. I am very sure I will not ever marry. It’s not what defines my life. It never has. I never played bride when I was growing up, never. Weird? Yep!
But damn, I enjoy relationships. I enjoy the dance and the spectacle, the closeness, intimacy and the heartbreak - it reminds me that life is life, after all.
So, heres to a string of 5 to 8 year relationships. Maybe longer if the ride is good, but only so long as the ride is good, and then, we recover and move on. I hope I have the stamina to live this into my 70’s!!!
Anyone free for a couple of years?? 
When I was 10 I started worrying that no one would ever love me enough to marry me, and that I would never have a family.
It took me 22 LOOOOOONG years to realize that I shouldn’t worry about someone loving ME, I should worry about finding someone that I love.
I had 3 long-term relationships in which I “learned” to love the guy. It wasn’t until I ended the last one that I learned that it’s true - before you can truly be in a loving relationship, you have to love yourself first.
Such a cliche, I know, but … like most cliches, it’s true! (At least for me). As soon as I accepted myself - faults and all - and stopped beating myself up for not being “perfect” … I found an incredible man.
We started out as friends - and I had to make the first, second, third etc. moves - which I have never done in my life. But because I believed I was worthy of this fantastic man, and I knew he was worthy of ME, I had the self-confidence to pursue him.
We’ve only been together for a few months, but it is definitely the healthiest, happiest relationship I’ve ever had.
I am a firm believer that we get what we deserve - if you’re willing to put the effort into loving yourself and accepting yourself, it’s amazing how much more attractive you become - to yourself and to others.
Just my two cents’ worth …
[Eve breathes very deeply and goes all Zen and tries very hard not to tie PiscesPrincess to a chair and bitch-slap her till she bleeds]
. . . Maybe I should just start a Pit Thread for you people . . .
You beat me to it, Eve, I was just gonna tell PicesPrincess what’s-what.
I hope to Goddess I won’t be single the rest of my life, but I will admit, i’m starting to worry. All of my friends are married. I work by myself in an office (i’ve got coworkers, but don’t see them on a daily basis, and they’re all married as well). I live alone and don’t really go “out” much. Usually, to movies and stuff with my married friends. I’m also pretty shy and have insanely low self esteem when it comes to relationships. I always told myself that I’d find someone when the time was right, but damn. This thread is seriously starting to worry me. 
May I humbly suggest Miguel Ruiz’s “The Mastery of Love”? You can get it used on Amazon.com for about 12 bucks.
Okay, okay, I know I’m in a relationship. It’s the part that came before it that’s important. Before I fell in love with Tom, I spent eight months single and not looking. I barely ever had sex - I could have if I wanted to (trust me) but I didn’t. And I didn’t really notice.
I had been such a hormone-bucket the few years previous that it really surprised me to look back on it. I guess it was a combination of the recession of my teenage sex drive and the decision really to take what comes and be happy with myself and my life in the meantime.
And I was quite happy single.
(And I’m very happy now too… and as I stated, that’s beside the point, merely including it for the sake of conjugal harmony )
I’ll be 19 next month and I’ve given up hope.
Guys just don’t seem to want to date me.
I don’t think I’m hideous, so why?
Whyyyyy?
Maybe I am hideous and I just don’t see it because I’m acustom to my face?
I don’t approach guys because I;m a chickenshit. But why approach and have to deal with rejection that’s 99% inevitable?
And no, that 1% won’t happen, I have the worst luck imaginable.
So whatever, I’ll be lonely forever.
That’s life.
Tough shit.