You could piss into a jug while in your vehicle just as many semi-truck drivers and other road warriors do. Pour the contents in the appropriate place at the end of each work-day when you get home.
Seconded.
Anyone paranoid and pathetic enough to need a paper towel to open and close a bathroom door probably should just stay home. Except that your house probably has about as many germs as the bathrooms in that office.
I realize that we need to take precautions when doing things like handling food, and i’ve always been an advocate of washing hands after using the bathroom, but the modern obsession with germs (all those stupid anti-bacterial wipes and crap that they advertise on TV) is pathetic.
I avoid hand to doorknob as much as possible, sometimes the paper towel thing, sometimes just by pulling my longsleeve down over my hand.
I get through “cold and flu season” with significantly more success than most people I know.
But, please note, the “Ick Factor” was the second reason for my annoyance. The rant is mostly about what a pointless inconvenience it is to need a key after such rigorous security screening to begin with.
As for why the key…I suspect many places it’s to keep track of when their employees take bathroom breaks. You’re not supposed to ask otherwise.
I do the paper towel thing on the door because the health department requires it…
Absolutely. I wake up in the morning, shower, wash my penis and put it away in a pair of clean underwear. There it stays while my fingers touch doorknobs, the cord to call for the bus to stop, the button to open the door of the train, the strap hanging from the pole on the train, the door at the coffee shop, my coffee mug, my badge, my keyboard, lots of stuff. Long story short: the fingers touch everything, Mr. Johnson stays inside my clean underwear. it is literally clean enough to put in my girlfriend’s mouth. The hands, not so much. That is why I sometimes wash my hands before touching mr. Johnson.
And I haven’t pissed on my hands since I quit drinking, thankyouverymuch.
I want to know who, in my rather posh offices in London, is wiping their huge, hairy boogers on the wall above the urinals.
Incidentally, I got sick all the time as a kid, and would almost never tell anyone that I was feeling sick, because I was afraid they’d think I was lying about it.
Possibly as a result, when everyone I live with is in bed all day sneezing and coughing and generally being miserable, I get a slight case of the sniffles.
Seems I’ve got an immune system like the Atlantic Wall, which is just a fancy way of saying that somewhere out there, is the largest collection of diseases known to man kind waiting to just whomp my smug healthy ass.
I had always assumed the key was an extra security measure. I mean, even if you screen everyone at the door, people can still talk their way in, or sneak in a service entrance or onto an elevator. Security guys are only human, after all, and a lot of times they have to do double-duty as doormen. And at night, its easier for a vandal/thief to hide in a bathroom than a hallway.
I guess maybe it doesn’t make the place that much more secure, but all it costs is a few keys and the hassle. I thought it was silly when I worked in those buildings, but we had some guy break into the basement of my building at school so I understand now why some women worry about being in office buildings alone at night. I admit that a lot of times these women’s safety concerns can get a little overboard, but it don’t think its that much more excessive than worrying about germs on a key.
I hope the receptionists are always nice and let you use the bathroom. There’s nothing worse than having to run around looking for a toilet.
Even better, fill the jug about halfway with kitty litter, which will absorb the piss and greatly reduce the odor. Not to mention minimizing the consequences of spilling the jug in your car.
snicker
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Yaknow, I never thought of that.
That’s frigging BRILLIANT. :eek:
Last time I worked in a building with locked restrooms, all employees had their own key. No idea if the other employers in the building did the same or not.
I still have my key. Maybe one day I’ll go back to see if it still works.