When someone exterminates all nearby life with their arse it is known as an SBD (Silent But Deadly)
Why are the silent ones so deadly?
Interestingly - it is still possible for the fart’s owner to revel in it as if it were the divinest scent on earth, despite it’s murderous power.
Are you actually looking for a factual answer on this??
BTW-My farts stink. I know they stink. They have never smelled good to me…Maybe I’m missing out…
I am sure one exists.
(I really am looking for a factual answer)
This doesn’t seem like a factual question to me. Apparently, standards have been loosened around here lately.
WAG…because they are almost pure gas. The loud ones are mostly swallowed air.
Probably the same reason a quiet engine feels more powerful than one with a blown muffler: it’s more powerful than you’d guess from the noise.
I am sure standards are as they always were. Why if I remember rightly - last time I did a search on ‘fart’ in GQ there were posts dating back a long way.
I am SOOOO glad the SDMB didn’t let me post what I was about to post!
(the 60 second rule blocked me)
Well now ALL of us want to know what you were gonna post. So let’s have it! 
I think it just seems that way because you haven’t received the audio warning and had a chance to brace yourself.
Alright, in an effort to ferrit out the truth, here’s my anecdotal evidence:
It’s not the silent ones that stink particularly, it’s the farts that burn your ass on the way out that really stink.
Ok, I won’t post it as-was. But I will explain.
I was about to post a witty reply to Herman Cheruscan’s post about a mispelled word. After I pressed submit I checked with MS Word, only to find out that the word was spelled correctly afterall. I came back to eat humble pie - and saw to my relief the ‘no more than one post every 60 seconds’ spiel.
boring eh. I bet you wish I kept quiet afterall.
I would say Reeder is nearest to the mark on this one. Noisy farts imply a large volume of gas: mainly swallowed air or methane from vegetable material such as brassicas or beans which are high-fibre and passing rapidly through the gut - both of which possibilities are relatively odorless. Quiet ones imply a small volume of gas, probably from decay of static protein material in the gut, which smells bad.
I always thought SBD farts were quieter because they have a higher moisture content. They slide out without the drag of a dry fart and because of the moisture, the smell in more concentrated. And you have a higher probability of skidmarks in your shorts too.
Um, cite?
Actually, never mind. I’m sure I don’t want to know where you picked up that idea. :lame winking smilie:
Oi, I know of what you speak, Lobsang.
It’s simply a matter of evolution. Over the eons, the forefathers of our species which emitted especially foul and mal-odiferous feats of gaseous prowess in an audible way were mercilessly slain, or sometimes (very occassionally) ostracized in such a manner that they would be unable to procreate further. Those lucky enough to posess the talent of emitting an uncommonly noxious cloud in a silent manner lived on, and passed the ability onto their offspring.
Today in our civilized world, we have come to the point where we might be proud of such a feat, and during social events such as the Superbowl (save for mixed-company), we might be apt to take credit for such a transgression. But make no mistake about it… the raised eyebrows, watering eyes, and feelings of discontent and unspoken anger are more a testament to the original feelings of destroying the malefactor than your ability to provide it without cost.
Between this and the **Velocity of Fart ** thread from way back… we dopers have an obsession with flatuence.
The bad smell of a fart is caused by bacteria, which have been dining and it is their waste that causes the methane and the smell. As stated a loud fart is usually swallowed air with possibly some methane mixed in. A small one is pure methane caused by those smelly little germs (a condensed version, you might say.) This also explains why shit smells so bad.
[sup]Why did I feel it was necessary to contribute this piece of knowledge?[/sup]
Uh, Thanks kniz. (why isn’t there a nauscious smilie?)
I have yet to see anyone post a cite showing that loud farts are caused by swallowing air. Nor has there been one posted showing that silent ones are caused by methan gas rather than air.
Cite, please?