So I was divorced…did the whole “I’m never going to let that happen to me again” thing and then met the one. We spoke of marriage, children and where we would live. We had the same interests…books & CD’s in our collections and all seemed to be rosy. Out of the blue she gave me the “I’m sorry but it’s not working out” speech and it was over. Just like that. No reasons. The absolute lowest I have ever felt in my life and I could have ended it there and then if it wasn’t for the unshakeable belief that it was all a mistake and what we had shared was too great to be really over. In my heart I always believed she was my other half, the missing piece…[insert cliche here].
I find out tonight that she was seeing someone else before she ended it with me and that two months after it was over she was engaged to be married.
I feel I should hate her. I want to hate her. But I love her…and hope she feels the way about her new love that I do about her but more importantly that he feels the same way.
There are no more fish in the sea.
It is not better to have loved than to never have loved before.
And I don’t want to love like I’ve never been hurt.
This is my pain…nobody elses. It will never desert me
Why bother hating her? Sustaining a solid hatred requires a lot of energy which can be better used for other things. Something that was re-affirmed for me when I ran into someone tonight who I used to hate and now realize I am totally indifferent to.
Cliche as it is, time heals, if not all, at least some wounds.
