Whereas on the 13th day of December, A.D. 2007, a proclamation was issued by Kythereia, the resident goddess of love at the Straight Dope Message Board, containing, among other things, the following, to wit:
That on the 13th day of December, A.D. 2007, all Canadians held as slaves within any State or designated part of a State the people whereof shall then be in rebellion against the United States shall be then, thenceforward, and forever free…
[QUOTE=Kythereia]
Whereas on the 13th day of December, A.D. 2007, a proclamation was issued by Kythereia, the resident goddess of love at the Straight Dope Message Board, containing, among other things, the following, to wit:
That on the 13th day of December, A.D. 2007, all Canadians held as slaves within any State or designated part of a State the people whereof shall then be in rebellion against the United States shall be then, thenceforward, and forever free…
[/QUOTE]
I’d like to have a stable of Canadians. They can pull my car along.
Unless they’re fine, nubile Canadian babes, then they can be my harem. My girlfriend will have to accept the new competition.
[QUOTE=Mindfield]
Hey, do you have any vintage Canadians? I’m looking for a 1980s-era Big Bobby Clobber.
[/QUOTE]
Oooh! Oooh! Do you have an early eighties Sharon Seto?
[QUOTE=Kuboydal]
Nobody in America wants to manufacture Canadians anymore.
[/QUOTE]
My American-born, half-Canadian three year old might like to disagree with you.
I have to beg to differ. After living in the NWT, I can only conclude that it’s Southern Canadians who look like this in the winter. I went through one winter with just a fleece and windbreaker. Ya big babies.
[QUOTE=Sunspace]
Oooh! Oooh! Do you have an early eighties Sharon Seto?
[/QUOTE]
I did many years ago, but one day she just up and took off with Liz Grogan. I still don’t know how they reconnected, but I did spot Billy Van and Robin Ward skulking around the bushes on several occasions around that time, and I had a strange message on my answering machine from Luba Goy.
What for? More Tekwar books and bad travel commercials?
That’s because we’re too expensive to maintain while we await shipment to retail outlets. Importing Canadian beer ain’t cheap!
[QUOTE=featherlou]
Simple math - there are 10 of you to every 1 of us. That makes Canadians rare and therefore much more valuable. A collector’s item, if you will.
[/QUOTE]
Wow, that makes me wish I was from the Pitcairn Islands instead.
Oh, please, don’t start convincing Americans we’re collectors items. Then we’ll start getting these rich artsy types hoarding as many as he can get his hands on and hanging us on walls or placing us in glass-encased daises among the columns of his west wing. I do not want to be a gargoyle on the cornice of some rich dude’s castle!
[sub]Not unless I can poop on him whenever he walks under me.[/sub]
Hmm, would it be immoral to creatae limited edition offspring to sell to collectors? What if your was so famous you could fund a leacherous binge, coast bto coast, on the railway? If it’s art, would the government fund it?
[QUOTE=Mindfield]
Oh, please, don’t start convincing Americans we’re collectors items. Then we’ll start getting these rich artsy types hoarding as many as he can get his hands on and hanging us on walls or placing us in glass-encased daises among the columns of his west wing. I do not want to be a gargoyle on the cornice of some rich dude’s castle!
[sub]Not unless I can poop on him whenever he walks under me.[/sub]
[/QUOTE]
I can just see the web site now: collect-a-canadian.com, with a weekly special on Canuks or a hardy northern type.
Now me, I don’t really want to collect 'em, but I wouldn’t mind a nice display piece or, better yet, a cozy snuggle-up. Where do I go to order one?