(1) I didn’t. She broke up with me. Never found out why; we were in a long distance relationship, and then we…weren’t. Got a Dear John letter saying it was over.
(2) Because the last year with her was without a doubt the worst year of my entire life. Pure hell. Morale, self-esteem, joy in life was never lower, and I never want to experience a fraction of what I went through ever again.
Needless to say, I’m not on speaking terms with either anymore.
Because I was happier when she wasn’t around in the end.
Of course, she told me yesterday she’d found someone else she could care about (she thought I’d ruined her) and the fact that I couldn’t handle dating her doesn’t mean my heart didn’t stop when she told me.
Last one got married to someone else in the middle of our relationship out of pressure from his ex-girlfriend who pulled some kind of race card and guilt explanation. This was a messy, emotionally disturbing breakup for me. And now they are getting a divorce and I still receive apologies about marrying the “wrong” girl.
Second last relationship was really long and was my first bf. When I went to work in another state temporarily, he failed to mention to me that he decided to have a girl move in with him. Needless to say, thousands of miles away I found out that he was sleeping with someone else. It was fine, we had broken up two years ago and before I left to go work out of state he decided he wanted me back. Stupid me went along, I guess when he realized this was our first opp to be apart after 8 years, it took him two months and a new girl to come along that he just happened to have live with him. It was funny to hear his explanation, yes I love you, but it just happened. awww. Funny thing is, he is forbidden from talking to me from his now gf. She called me and I had moved on, and she was worried she was dating him while he was going out with me. I did tell her that was the case, but it was most definately over and I am happy that he has somone to live with.
I dont have very good luck with guys.
The other question (in another post) was how do you break up with someone longterm. What I said was “I can offer you more as a friend, then as a girlfriend”. He took it well, was stunned. I was not good at enforcing this breakup and he felt like I abandoned him so we remained friends, but that prolonged the breakup, which was not a good idea.
i’m innocent baby, come back to the trailor and we can work it out. j/k
I wonder if this is ban worthy? i hope not.
Because she killed herself. Made continuing the relationship difficult.
My last SO didn’t like me telling any of our peers that we were dating, didn’t like being referred to as “a girlfriend” (except for a 36 hour period after I asked her if I could refer to her as such), and totally backed off on physical affection. No hand holding, cuddling on the couch, no kissing or hugging. She wouldn’t explain why, and still won’t- I’ve asked her what was going on, and she feels that she doesn’t have to explain anything about it.
I asked her if I had done something wrong, and she said I hadn’t, so I put up with it for a few weeks, hoping things would change, and go back to the way they were, but they didn’t, and her way of flirting, was to insult me at that point. Saying things like “I didn’t think you would be any good in bed” and such. I finally realized that even if things went back to the way they were, I would still resent the way she was acting, and I told her I didn’t want to see her anymore.
For some reason, she acted shocked.
Probably shouldn’t have married in the first place. I am an emotional thinker, he is a logical thinker and very unemotional and it made it very hard for us to communicate. We thought becuase we had a lot of the same values and goals it would m,ake u p for it - it didn’t. He was in the Air Force and we lived over seas for the majority of our marriage. He was gone for 50% of our relationship - that didn’t help at all. Eventually what little bit of communication we had deteriorated into having very little reespect and care for each other. I actually like him far better now tht we are divorced. I think of him as a friend and a partner in raising our children instead of a demon scourge upon the earth that I am being forced to co-exist with.
Christ!
[understatement] That must have been difficult to deal with. [/us]
–Clify
I have to hear the story about this one.
I’d imagine. Did you have any idea that should would do that?
Yes, I had some idea that she might. She had somehow convinced herself that this entire reality was nothing more than an illusion, and that she could free herself by dying. I tried to convince her otherwise, but didn’t succeed obviously. The relationship was mostly long distance, so I wasn’t able to intervene.
My ex left me for a man who HONESTLY believed he was the modern day incarnation of the Egyptian god, Annubis. I told her I couldn’t compete with that and to fly and be free…just promise me you won’t breed.
Six months later she gives birth. I hear about this from my exes mother and I ask her if the baby has any unusual birthmarks…such as a cluster of 3 sixes in the crown of its head. She became rather indignant at that point and said that was a “Horrible thing to say”. I replied by saying, yes it was but the baby has horrible parents.
As I walked down the street after that exchange, I knew the feeling of pleasure you can get when closure happens in a bad relationship.
I met him the summer before I started dating him. The first summer, he was pressuring me to give him a chance. I wasn’t interested because of the age difference (he was 7 years older than me, and that’s a lot when you’re 20). The next year, he was still interested and I was somewhat interested in him and we started dating. When school started, I was busier and he began to complain that he wasn’t getting the attention he wanted. We would make weekend plans and half of the time they would fall through. We started fighting more, although we had pretty much made up by Christmas. We had made plans for New Years Eve (we would be at his parents’ house). He canceled them about 4 that day. We had a huge fight–I didn’t speak to him for two days. And it all pretty much went downhill from there–it’s been off and on and I havent talked with him in about 7 weeks.
Oh, and he was also very controlling, and was not respectful of some of my values. Mom warned me that guys like that can turn into hitters.
Thaumaturge, as a depression sufferer who has attempted suicide, I’m sorry to hear your girlfriend lost her battle 
I broke up with mine after three years of being together, two of which I waited for him to make up his mind whether he wanted me long-term or not, here 1000 miles away. When he went off to Europe and left me here rather than marry me or even attempt to make plans to take me with, I said I’m tired of waiting and broke things off.
It’s been over half a year and I’m still kind of dealing with recovering from it. We don’t speak now.
One of my friends is a selfish, scheming, amoral jerk with no integrity. Also I see now she is no angel.
Part of it was my fault, but not all of it. Part of that was I never called her.
I broke up with my ex (who was my first serious relationship) because he turned out to be incredibly insecure, so much so that it really, really hindered our relationship. He was convinced I was going to wind up dumping him at any moment (talk about a self fulfilling prophecy). He was also jealous and a tad bit posessive. Couldn’t take a joke either, although he made rude sarcastic comments about my friends and family quite a bit. After a year that whole shitck got tiring and I ended the relationship.