Dang! I just listed my old first edition books on eBay. Now you’re making me second-guess that action…
In the chapter of LotR on Lothlorien, Tolkien makes a point about his conception of magic. Sam observes that Lothlorien is the most magical place one could imagine, but that the magic is “right down deep where you can’t see it, if you take my meaning” (or words to that effect). In Middle-Earth, the real magic is behind the scenes.
If you do things right, they never know you did anything at all.
There’s a lot of subtle, veiled magic in the Tolkien universe. Take Legolas running on top of the snow while the hobbits sink in it. He’s not really that lightweight, and there must be magic involved or he’d have no traction and he’d slide down the mountain. Galadrial’s mirror, swords that glow around orcs, the Palantir, these are all artifacts. But the most influential players in the story (Sauron, Saruman, Gandalf…) tend to accomplish their goals without turning someone into a newt.
I think it’s more like…
Gandalf : DnD Wizard :: Dog : Dogwood tree
They just don’t compare. It’s like a Twilight vampire vs. an Ann Rice vampire, a Buffy the Vampire Slayer vampire, Dracula, or a Tanya Huff vampire. They ain’t the same thing.
Nicely done.
Yes – exactly as we should expect from a devout Catholic like Tolkien.
Take all the answers a Christian would give to why Jesus just didn’t heal everyone, wax all the romans, and bring about heaven on earth, and I suspect it will sound quite a bit like a description of why Gandalf was the way he was.
Though of course Frodo did suggest that Sam would be turned into a spotted toad if he told anyone about what he heard from outside the window. A bit later Gandalf actually said (jokingly) “And see that Sam Gamgee does not talk. If he does, I really shall turn him into a toad.”
I believe that quote should have “like it ain’t no thing” attached to end of it…
Yeah! Dogwood trees look pretty, but dogs get to pee all over -
Oh. Uh, I must not have interpreted that properly. Neverwind!
I doubt it. My impression is that the greatest warriors of any age were pretty much crap compared to the greatest warriors of earlier ages.
Also, Gimli matched (and if I remember right, surpassed) Legolas’s kill total at Helm’s Deep, so he’s presumably a comparable warrior. And yet a whole freaking nation of dwarves couldn’t beat one Balrog.
who would win in a fight? Batman or Gandalf?!
Er… I mean, Gandalf or Raistlin Majere?!
Yeah, but they could also get killed by a lucky housecat…
What, manipulating the course of human events isn’t flashy enough for you?
Batman would barely escape the first matchup, and then the second time around he’d find a way to make Gandalf submit not by defeating him in combat, but by threatening something he loved.
Though Batman would only do that if he knew he had to do it (ie: to save HIS own world or something- he might then threaten to hold all of the Shire hostage by some sort of explosive device).
A hedge wizard can snap his fingers and light his cigarette. A true wizard just happens to bump into the guy who will let him bum a smoke, EVERY time he wants one.
A newt?
Not to mention surviving a fall into an abyss, pursuing the Balrog underground for days, and fighting it for two days in a battle that broke chunks off the mountain.
If one of those flashy D&D magic users tried to fry him with a fireball, I suspect he’d stride unharmed out of the flames with an irritated expression and casually lop the magic user’s head off.
At least in the movie version, Gandalf fights the Balrog while falling down into a pit, outside the mountain, up the mountain, and then back down the mountain. That’s way beyond a 5th level D&D wizard. If you really want to make a stat block for Gandalf, I’d start with a Solar (a powerful type of angel) and make some modifications. For the Balrog, well, the Balor demons are essentially a direct ripoff, so there you go.
The problems with turning people into newts is that they tend to get better.
Batman would prepare and be ready for Gandalf but would fail to realize that Gandalf dealt in a millennial view and as Batman’s plan unfolded little things would go awry and foil him. For Gandalf deals in both a mix of Divine Intervention and a healthy dose of offstage “A Wizard Did It”.
But could Gandalf beat Cthulhu?
Probably not but maybe he could send him back to his watery dreaming slumbers.