Women who love clothes-shopping - why?

In My Humble Opinion
1

I have never understood many women’s love for clothes shopping. While I admit there is a certain joy in finding a good bargain, to me there is almost no way to quicker make me feel a) poor b)fat and c) oddly shaped, since none of the common sizes fit anyone well.

I do it because I have to. I was just over at Boscov’s. On the one hand, I bought two $40 shirts for the grand total of $20. On the other hand, I saw this skirt that I adored - it had the perfect weight and look to it. I fell in love with it right away. Price? * One hundred and fifty-five dollars*. I cannot justify spending so much money on one piece of apparel!

But lots of my acquaintances love shopping and can spend hours in the store! How do they do this?

Maybe you guys can tell me what appeals to you so much, and maybe I can listen and stop dreading the experience so much. :slight_smile:

2

Sorry, can’t help you–I have the same poor/fat/odd problem!

3

The way I see it, a well made item that you love and will wear for years is absolutely worth $150 (and of course a crappily made trendy item is absolutely NOT worth $150, unless that qualifies as mad money for you).

I like pretty things. I love finding them, I love buying them, I love wearing them. But I’m not sure I love shopping itself. For me it’s a means, not an end. I don’t shop recreationally.

4

I think it’s just as simple as liking new stuff; for a lot of people. I, personally, like buying new things; clothes, electronics, or whatever. I like going to the stores, or to the websites and looking at and comparing all the different choices, and being in a mall in general, and all the different bags, and the whole experience, I guess. If you love shopping, and have the disposable income, you’d probably have no problem justifying spending a good portion of your money for fun on clothes. I don’t know what to say about you feeling fat/oddly shaped besides, maybe getting recommendations here for brands that fit people with your body type well?

5

For me, the main problem is that I have to hit the trifecta of having free time, energy and money. All at the same time. Doesn’t happen often.

6

Well, currently the only thing fitting me well is mumus as I’m 8.5 months pregnant; however, when I’m NOT pregnant, I can actually buy stuff directly off the rack* with no alterations needed and have them fit perfectly. Right length, right hip/waist ratio, etc. Occasionally I have a problem with blouses pulling at the bust; however, if I really love it, I just buy it in the bust fitting size and have it altered down at the waist.

So, that helps - if you go in a store and everything fits well and looks pretty (in your mind) it’s pretty fun to shop. I recognize that this is not the case for most people.

That being said, I actually just like shopping. Friends will ask for assistance from me when they need to get things because I’m usually pretty good at finding things that will fit well and look pretty on them too.

As far as $150 for a skirt - well, if it’s fab, and fits perfectly and you love it and you’re going to wear it twice a week for 2 years - well, that’s less than a buck a wearing - to me that’s value. Consider instead buying a $30 skirt that doesn’t fit well, pulls in awkward places, has the hem fall down, buttons pop off or the fabric start to pull after 3 wearings. Well, I may be picky but I won’t wear an item like that because it looks tacky, so I wear it 6 times, it looks trashed and I’ve spent $5 a wearing - less value.

Anyhow - if you don’t like to shop that’s no big deal; however, to me it’s a bit like asking why people like Word of Warcraft. They like it because they do, they have friends who participate, they find it fun, etc. WOW isn’t personally my thing, but I guess I get why other people like it.

*At certain stores - Banana Republic, JCrew, Anthropologie - teeny-bopper stores generally have nothing that fits me correctly so I don’t go in there. Also because I’m not a teeny-bopper. :slight_smile:

7

If I found something I liked and it fit and I could afford it, I imagine I’d love to shop.

However, I am literally unable to clothes-shop for more than a short time without having a complete breakdown. I approach it with trepidation, which mounts to frustration, which blossoms quickly into bitterness, suspicion, anger, etc. If forced to shop until I actually bought something, there would most likely be tears.

8

Nope, can’t help you at all.

9

My mom loves it because she’s crazy full of energy, is semi-retired so she’s got plenty of time, and has lots of money. And because she’s like a heat seeking missile when it comes to deals.

I would like it if I had more disposable income, of course.

10

I think there really is a distinction to be made between “shopping” and “buying clothes”. Shopping can be tremendously frustrating, but it’s also absolutely necessary until you learn what works for you. Once you know what works for you, if you’re lucky, you need never set foot in a mall again. I do *not *enjoy the mall. But I *love * having new clothes, and I do the vast majority of my clothes shopping online, with astoundingly little failure, because after years of trial and error in the dressing room, I know what works for me, and can spot it even when it’s pictured on a woman who is six feet tall and weighs 114 pounds.

11

I don’t love shopping for hours and hours on end. But I don’t really shop by going into stores and expecting to spend a whole afternoon. I just stop by stores once in a while to see if there’s anything I like. Less stressful that way and when I do find something, it’s nice.

12

As comparison - men are known to shop by deciding what they are going to buy, going to the store to find it, then buying it. End.

I’ve heard it said -

Women are gatherers, men are hunters.

13

I can see the appeal of wandering around “shopping” for an afternoon - just browsing through interesting goods in a relaxed fashion. I don’t do it for clothes shopping ( I’m pretty utilitarian in that regard ) and I usually don’t have the patience to spend a whole day shopping myself.

But I can easily see where the appeal comes from. I enjoy browsing in book and music stores with no particular goal in mind for an hour or so and I do have the disposable income to make impulse buys if the mood strikes. Back when Cody’s ( new bookstore ) was still open on Telegraph in Berkeley, I’d wander down and quickly browse through there, Moe’s ( superb used book store, still there ), Half-Price Books, maybe Shakespeare’s ( not often though, wasn’t fond of that store ), sometimes the local comics store when it was still open, Rasputin Records and Amoeba Records - all in a two block radius and all in the space of a couple of hours.

Shopping for clothes isn’t in any way fundamentally different, it just happens that in my case I’m somewhat indifferent to clothes as a consumer item.

14

Well, I’m a woman and I guess I shop more like a dude. :smiley:

I hate shopping…for anything. I rarely shop for clothes and when I do, I always check out Goodwill or Value Village before looking for anything new. And when I do shop for clothes, it’s for something specific - like last week when I had to replace the bra the dog chewed up. If I shop for shoes, it’s because I need shoes…not because I want them.

My son got married a couple of months ago and the idea of shopping for something nice, appropriate, and new to wear to the wedding about stroked me out.

I do like garage and yard sales, though, but I don’t usually spend much time at any one sale either. It usually only takes me a couple of minutes to know if there’s anything I might like.

15

All right, I will be that woman. The one who truly loves shopping, who could do it all day and night if I had the time and the money.

This weekend was the start of the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale. My friend and I agreed to meet (as we did last year as well) on Friday morning at 7:00 a.m. at the store entrance, to be there when the doors opened. We shopped continuously until 11:00 a.m., when she had to go to an appointment. I then took my bags home, because I don’t have a car and carrying around three shoe boxes would have made more shopping prohibitive. I had some lunch and then headed out to the other mall, to check out a different Nordstrom and some other stores, and shopped there until around 6:00 p.m. Since I had to transfer trains back at the first mall, I stopped in there and shopped until around 8:30 p.m., and then went home, tired and poor, but very happy.

On Saturday morning, I had to watch the Open (golf) championship, which is another of my passions, but after it was over, I hit the stores again, shopping from around 2:00 p.m. to 7:00 p.m. Then I came home and stuck the credit card in a drawer so I wouldn’t be tempted for a while.

Why do I do it? It makes me happy. I’ve speculated that because I have body issues, I feel the need to adorn my body (I also love jewelry). I also think that having lots of “stuff” in the form of clothing fills some sort of emptiness in my life, and I do have that “gatherer” instinct. I’m known for going from store to store to store to find exactly the right item. I don’t just do it with clothes – yesterday I visited three different Safeway stores trying to find a particular type of yogurt (I never did find it, so I’m off to a fourth market after work today). I do shop online, but I actually enjoy the “hunt”.

New clothes make me feel pretty. I am by no means a perfect size and shape – in fact I am two sizes larger below the waist than above the waist, which makes it impossible for me to buy a two-piece suit or a dress. I also have disproportionately large arms, which is why I was unable to find a leather jacket yesterday, after trying on at least two dozen. But when I find something that fits and looks good on me, I do get a rush. I probably enjoy buying clothes more than wearing them, although sometimes I put together an outfit that really works and then it’s all worth it.

Yesterday, I was like a little kid with a brand new pair of shoes. I was wearing the Munro Tate boots that I bought in the new purple suede, after four months of anticipation. What’s not to love?

Wow, that was sort of more analysis than I intended, but that’s the basics. It’s the thrill of the hunt, combined with making myself look better, that makes shopping a fun activity for me. The only problem is that I probably can’t have another spree like that until sometime next year if I want to stay within budget.

16

That’s evidence right there that you like shopping more than I do. Me, I’ll head straight for the section of the store with the sale prices posted, and only after I’ve established that I’m looking at things that are reasonably priced do I even consider which garments would look better. Even if I were the sort to wear skirts, I’d have never even noticed that $155 skirt in the first place.

17

A lot of that is because men’s sizes and cuts are pretty consistent brand to brand and their clothing rarely gets discontinued because it’s out of style. Thus a man can walk into a random store, pick up a pair of size axb jeans and a size c shirt and be reasonably confident the damn stuff will fit and look okay. A woman, otoh, will pick up three pairs of jeans in the same size and one pair will be too big, one pair will be too small, and one pair will mostly fit but give you muffin top and/or camel toe and/or plumber butt. That brand and style you got last time that fit perfectly? Oooh, they stopped making/we stopped carrying those, sorry. What everybody’s wearing now is this style that is hideously unflattering on you, would you like to try those on? Ma’am, I’ll have to ask you not to lie in the fetal position under the clothing racks, you’re upsetting the other customers.

18

Shopping is relaxing to me. I don’t like to go with other people, but rather, I like to just sort of wander around myself, figuring out what I want, finding deals, etc. I think that’s part of it, too- while I love me some designer items, I only buy them when they are at Nordstrom Rack or Off Saks (discount/outlet versions of the stores) and 90% off. In my life, I’ve only paid full price for two luxury items (that I can remember): a Louis Vuitton wallet when I was 16 (stupid purchase- I saved and saved and saved for it, but I still don’t use the damned thing; it’s too big!) and a limited edition Coach bag for $220 that is now being resold for $500+. Though I am saving up to buy one really nice pair of shoes- something that’ll last me a lifetime like a good black pump. Nice shoes = more comfy shoes and my feet kill me at work sometimes. Clothes? Eh, I’m cheap. I shop at Ross, Marshalls, etc. You have to dig, but you can find some diamonds in the heaps of mom jeans :).

But yeah, shopping alone is a nice way to spend some time clearing my head, out of the house, away from people, and then have something to show for it. I mostly look for things I can wear to work and out on the day to day, so the stuff I get is generally functional, too.

In the case of that $150 skirt-I’m sure it will go on sale before long. Look out for coupons for that retailer (retailmenot.com is a good source), then compound that with the sale price. I regularly get $150+ items for a much more reasonable $20 or so.

19

I hate clothes shopping too. Of course I will spend three hours in a used CD shop “just browsing”

See it’s a matter of what interests you.

My mum and a neighbor lady spent all day every Thursday going to garage sales (in the 70s before eBay :))

You have to look at it as an activity rather than a means to get something to wear.

20

It can be an aesthetically stimulating experience, too. Like, I’m one of those who has a hard time finding something that will both fit me properly and be in my budget, so I actually hate shopping when I’m looking for something specific I need to get, but sometimes I just like to go to a nice store and look at pretty things, touch nice fabrics, get ideas for interesting color combinations, etc. Recently I had some time to kill, so I went to the formal dress section in Lord and Taylor and tried on a bunch of cocktail dresses I would never have the occasion to wear, just because I thought it would be fun to see what those kinds of dresses would look like on me. (And it was.)