Please don’t blow this question off; I’m serious.
I know these two are from different times and live in different environs, but what if? In fact, since we’re going into hypotheticals, what if the Wooly Mammoth had fangs and the Giant Squid had a laser gun?
Please hurry your answer, a steak dinner is riding on this one.
You dolt… isn’t it obvious?
Don King wins… No fangs… No laser gun… nothin’. A mild case of bed-head is all he needs.
BTW… lol.
It’s all according to who gets the homefield advantage.
What does a giant squid have in common with a woolly mammoth?
The one that comes to mind is that neither has ever been seen alive!
Giant squids are still around, woolly mammoths are extinct. Giant squids win.
Well, your woolly mammoth generally carries more firepower than the average giant squid – at least a dozen shrapnel grenades and some sort of machine gun (depending on his regiment), as well as either a flame-thrower or a backpack-mounted missile launcher. Squid, on the other hand, are more likely to be equipped with non-projectile weapons (such as ceramic daggers and garottes – squid are much prized as assassins).
So, in a fair firefight, you’ve got to give the mammoth the edge. He’s got more ammo and a better supply chain. But if the fight is in an urban setting, or the combatants don’t start within line-of-sight, the squid’s ninja training will allow him to cleanly kill the mammmoth without much trouble.
…but when you get blue, and you’ve lost all your dreams, there’s nothing like a campfire and a can of beans!
I also have to go with the giant squid.
Most importantly, the squid has more “arms”. This allows it to bring much more firepower to the battle, and also greatly increases its ROF (rate of fire). Under the chemical cocktail of a serious fight with the large degree of misses (only 1/4 shots will hit by a trained police officer) this means the squid will hit with 2 weapons with every round of fire.
Some might argue that the wooly mammoth is more heavily armored, but this simply isn’t true. The tough leathery skin of the squid provides nearly the same level of protection as the mammoth’s hide and fur.
Also, the squid lives in a much more hostile environment than the mammoth who only had to worry about speak wielding humans. The squid had to face such terrors as Godzilla when he was growing up, and this reality training gives him a considerable edge in terms of mindset when the battle starts.
Giant Squid over the Mammoth 9.9 time out of 10.
I’m going to have to disagree with Glitch on this one. True, the giant squid can wield multiple firearms, thus increasing the ROF, but that doesn’t necessarily mean an increase in the rate of hits- I don’t think the giant squid can aim all arms simultaneously.
The wooly mammoth armor debate could probably fill another whole thread, but to summarize, the mammoth armor tests had several flaws which makes me question the results. Actual mammoths weren’t used, but the outer hide, stretched over gelatin (to simulate the mammoth). This completely disregarded the impact-absorbing fat layer, which can completely stop most small arms fire.
The giant squid does have a better fighting mindset than the mammoth, though, especially if you’re considering a ninja-trained giant squid (as most are). I think it would come down to individual skills and terrain, as Da Ace mentioned.
Arjuna34
I think that you’re all forgetting the squid’s visual advantage. The squid is translucent, and we all know that wooly mammoths have poor visual acuity even on the best of days. I think that this will enable the squid to be much more likely to sneak up on the mammoth and attack at close range.
If the squid gets the mammoth by suprise at close range, that’s all she wrote, folks. However, if the mammoth does see the squid coming and can stomp the sucker, the mammoth has a much better shot.
man oh man…I’d pay to see that epic battle…
Arjuna:
In “Giant Squid Monthly” (July 1999, p.23-25) there was an issue about the aiming of multiple weapons at once. The issue came down to whether the squid was, in fact, radioactive or not. The radioactive squid has a multi-threaded (to use a geeky term) brain which allowed him to aim all weapons an once. The regular giant squid was only able to aim half of his weapons. Note, that this still allows for 1 hit for every round of fire, whereas the mammoth with its limited intellect will only be able to operate a single weapon at a time, although trained he could be using them “John Woo” style and hence two weapons. This still only gives him 1 hit for every 2 rounds of fire.
Also, I am well aware of the tests on mammoth hide, but those tests were flawed by using, as you yourself point out, small arms fire. The squid in the OP is armed with laser weaponry, more than capable injuring the mammoth. And if I assume that the mammoth in return is armed with more than the OP (mere fangs) and with side mounted rocket launchers and such then they are both able to injure each other. Still the higher rate of fire, and hence rate of hits for the squid will prevail as well as his living in essentially in inner city of the monster world, under the sea. The only tougher environment would be the radioactive wasteland, and we all now that anybody from that environment would easily lay waste to both the giant squid and mammoth with great ease.
Buncha wise guys…
I agree that the recent rash of “Godzilla vs. Lassie” threads has been stupid. We’ve left them because (partly) they have tended to have actual answers and (mostly) because they die quickly and we can’t think of anywhere to move them.
I’ll leave this one for now simply because I’m amused, but help us out and let it die soon, OK?
And please please please don’t open the Godzilla v. Lassie thread. Please?
Change Your Password, Please and don’t use HTML, as it has been disabled
Whattsa matter, Manny, afraid your favorite cross-dressing canine pal would get his ass kicked?
Who needs to open it since you brought it up?
Clearly, the answer is Lassie. Sure, Godzilla has size, strength, laser eyes, etc, but Lassie is smart and loyal … uhh, who am I kidding, Godzilla in micro-seconds.
I’m not up on the whole battle efficiency of Pacaderms and Cephlapods like rest of you guys so I can’t accurately project a winner. One thing I’m sure of though; I’d be rooting for the wooly mammoth. I’d have about a ton of corn flour, a couple hundred gallons of hot oil and a vat of shrimp cocktail sauce ready for the victory party.
Well, I must say, I was looking forward to JohhnyHarvard’s upcoming “kid from Malcolm in the Middle vs the kid from Sixth Sense”, but Manny’s a quick draw. I guess the world needs boundaries. Even in SDland.
Go Fighting Cephalopods!
Rah Rah Rah!
Dr. Fidelius, Charlatan
Associate Curator Anomalous Paleontology, Miskatonic University
“You cannot reason a man out of a position he did not reach through reason.”
I think you are all missing the point. The squid has the advantage of range. The mammoth would be toast before he ever got within fang range.
Robert