“I guess this shirt’s clean, more or less.”
“I have to get up really early tomorrow.”
“Are any single women going to be there?”
“What do you mean you can’t go? Man you are whipped.”
Beerios, it’s not just for breakfast anymore.
Yes, bourbon and tequila is a proper mixed drink. It’s just not a very good one.
Clothes on the floor make a good bathmat and it’s like presoaking them before putting them in the wash!
Tetanus Shot
Happy Hour
Condoms
In that order.
It wasn’t me.
Well, how about next Saturday?
No, I’m sponging off my parents.
“‘Die Hard’ is due back on the 11th, Black Anal Vixens is due back on Friday.”
“Whites and colors huh? Seperate?”
“I have them because I took an art class last year and had to do some female form sketches.”
“I thought that the toilet cleaned itself every time I flushed.”
“That long blonde hair is from my buddy’s golden retriever.”
“If you put enough hot sauce on it, it tastes just like tacos.”
“Of course they’re clean. I changed them last year.”
They’re suppossed to stick.
Its not normally this messy - i’ve just been having a bit of a clear up
“Thanks the Goddess they have Pop Tarts in the vending machine at work. I’ll just grab breakfast there!”
“Best if sold by February 2007.”
from ‘Army of Darkness (possibly 2)’: “Awwwh, that was just pillow talk, baby…”
//all apologies to Bruce Campbell for brutalizing that quote… and Bruce, if you’re reading this, THANKS!