Fargin’ Corksucker!
Or like on SNL: Cork Soaker.
Or, even better, every time that you DON’T swear, take some money from the jar.
littoral
Hee! Nope, but that website is fun. 
“Arglefraster” is pretty good, too.
titular
For the ‘P’ word, can’t you just use ‘pussy’ itself while clearly referring to cats in context?
Unrelated dirty sounding words:
Piscatory
Beer nuts
Luscious
Conde Nast.
Cunctation / Cunctator (sorry doper!)
Runt
Battered Women. A delicious treat!
Wher is Cunctator when we need him?
Many years ago a coworker’s elderly mother was in the hospital for angina. His teenage son was telling people his granny was having “female trouble.”
Did you ask if she had Acute Angina?
Well, it’s probably not dirty if you’re a Keebler elf. 
From “Family Guy”:
[looking at whales]
Chris Griffin: Dad, what’s the blowhole for?
Peter Griffin: I’ll tell you what it’s not for. And when I do, you’ll understand why I can never go back to Sea World.
And another entry: Bangkok
Bunghole isn’t, despite what people may think. It’s perfectly appropriate to call a liquor store “The Bunghole” (there’s one in Salem, Massachusetts), even though Robot Arm keeps mentioning it. ( 
)
At least it’s memorable.
After a romantic trick: Cupid Stunt
From Ghostbusters: Epidimys
Phuket - Island in Thailand (pronounced poo-ket)
Actually, Thailand was good for a bunch of these. There’s Bangkok (already mentioned) Phi-Phi (Pee-pee) off the top of my head ((snicker)).
I spent the majority of the week giggling like a third grader.
“Look, look at me! I’m writing profanity on the wall!”
POPPYCOCK
[/Stewie Griffen]
Scrofula.
Scunthorpe.
Yes, offer to show people pictures of your wifes pussies. Yes, plural. Tell folks she has three of them.
Or, if you have a wound that gets infected, you could tell the jar-owner that it is covered in puss and therefore is “pussy.”