Oh, and regarding people asking what I do for a living… My response that I’m an artist was invariably followed by “What kind of art do you do?” The problem is, I don’t do paintings or sculpture or any traditional medium. The kind of art I do is really hard to describe in words, it sounds really stupid; you just have to see it to appreciate it. The times when I attempted to describe it, the person’s eyes would glaze over. So now I just say I’m retired.
Oh, you are an Aero engineer? Since you’re not busy, can you help me with this Weight and Balance report?
I used to tell people that I am a computer programmer, but when personal computers became common that led to the “fix my desktop” requests that a number of others have mentioned. I now tell people that I write software for banks.
No one ever asks me for advice on how to fix their helicopters… but I do get asked to do automotive diagnosis and repairs. You know, because helicopters and cars are so closely related in their form & function. Quoting my shop rate of $100/hr plus parts usually stops that pretty quickly, but I’ve had a couple people persist because my rate was still cheaper that what they’d been quoted by an automotive pro.
As an A&P, I would find it interesting to sit down with you over a couple drinks, and discuss component placement vs. access panel size & placement, the use of multiple fastener sizes in the same access panel, and other provocative topics. 
This my thread on this topic:
As another A&P I want to join you-all for this session!
Heck, I am going back to college to figure out why the engineers do what they do. This five year course in engineering will probably take me over ten years as I am old & do not remember as well as I once did. I also can only take one course a semester, work schedule allowing.
The shop rate here for our FBO is $125.00 & we are still cheaper than some automoble repair shops.
Yep, I’m a software engineer and the words “You know stuff about computers, right?” always send a chill down my spine. Though the most amusing request I got (almost 20 years ago) was “You know how email works, right? Can you email the President and tell him there are too many Arabs running gas stations around here?”
Can you fix my bank’s software so it doesn’t keep charging me overdraft fees?
I’m a nurse. You have no idea how many rashes, sores, lumps, bumps, bruises and body fluids I have been asked to look at. Unasked, people will pull clothes up or down as needed in public for me to diagnose their problems. I have been asked to pop cysts (so tempting!) give injections (umm, maybe), apply steristrips to lacerations and remove sutures so that the person doesn’t “have to take time of work to get them removed.” (sorry, no.)
I usually don’t mind being contacted by family or friends who are unsure if they should go to ER or urgent care as opposed to waiting for their regular PCP’s office to open. I consider those as legitimate concerns/questions, and I am happy to help.
Another infrequent but still significant scenario is when I roll up on a recent wreck scene, before the cops or EMS have arrived. In that case I bail out and assess for injuries. If there are any I do First Responder type stuff until cops/EMS arrive and take over. That is more of a Good Samaritan thing though, and I am happy to help.
That sounds cool, so, what kind of art do you do?
(Yes, I did that purposely. I do art, but it’s drawing in a sketchbook, which many ordinary people can understand… respect, perhaps not, but they are able to wrap their brain around it)
I get oodles of calls from people that want either the military to come and work (the creek that runs through my parents farm is very polluted with garbage and broken things illegally dumped - why don’t you guys go clean it up! It would be great Training) to "Hey, we want to appreciate the soldiers. How about you come to our community event, in your uniforms, help us set-up, have some cool vehicles or something for the kids, and we can give you a ticket for a hot dog?
I’m not even including the fringe callers “My neighbors are terrorists! I know they are because they dress all in grey and wear sensible shoes!”
“Yeah sorry…Posse comitatus and all that. Take it up with Rutherford B. Hayes if you have a problem with it.”
I sell houses. Most people are happy to discuss the current market and ask for a little pre-sale prep advice. I’m fine with that because it’s all talk and if I make an impression it could lead to business for me.
Luckily no one has ever asked me to sell their house for free. 
My husband, however, is in physical therapy. Everywhere he goes someone wants him to look at their sore ankles, backs, and knees.
Electrician here. All. The. Damn. Time.
I don’t mind a quick conversion to help out someone or give a little guidance but…
Even though I’m industrial only, mom gets free work upon request, no questions asked.
Depending on your relationship to me you’ll get:
“Boss won’t let me do side work, sorry.”
“It’ll cost X (expensive) if I do it myself, or I can drink your beer whilst watching and making sure you don’t fuck it up.”
Or maybe I’ll just do it and not mention charges, reserved for people in need(as judged by me).
Well actually, i would like to do a single seat micro plane, top speed of 350mph, range of 1200 miles, stressed aluminum skin, mechanical controls, retractable landing gear etc
Can you help me?
For me, it’s not my work, it’s my hobby.I have horses. practical strangers want to invite themselves over to ride my horse (no) or let their kids ride my horses (no) or get their kid’s picture taken while riding my horses (no). I say, “I’m sorry, I don’t have insurance to cover a possible injury. No one’s allow to ride but me.”
StG
Having worked as a ticket scalper in my twenties, you’d be amazed at the amount of people who confuse “ticket scalper” for “drug dealer”.
Customer: “Can you score me some weed/cocaine?”
Me: “Um… no. That’s not what I do. I run a legal business. I’m not a criminal.”:rolleyes:
I love this.
I’m a doctor. When I went home for Christmas my family specifically requested that I bring my stethoscope and otoscope.
I’m a chemist. I get some joke comments/questions about cooking meth. Especially while Breaking Bad was running. I think they’re jokes.
“I don’t know how to synthesize methamphetamine.”
Slight hijack: My bold. I’m interested, what do you do? (art student and active artist, non-traditional media - I promise my eyes won’t glaze over.)
On-topic: When I was a cleaner, people learned quickly not to ask me about work related stuff lest they be grossed out.