We had been living together for nine months, and had talked about getting married.
Oops! I’m so sorry! I think I was conflating you with Dung Beetle for a second there. But I honestly remember you being in a releationship.
But your advice is good. So why don’t we go out on a date? You once self-described yourself as being a babe, and I’ve been really curious ever since. That is, if you don’t mind being seen with this toad (I’m the one on the far left). It doesn’t have to involve no wedding dress, nor hand holding, nor lovey-dovey eyes or anything else. Just a little time hanging out with someone nice. A movie, or drinks, or bowling – whatever. I just feel the need to get out for a bit. If it would make you feel any better, we can invite other Dopers to come along.
Seriously, it could be a blast. And if you don’t want to, that’s OK too. 
We don’t live together, but we live so close as to be neighbors. About 30 feet apart, actually. I told her I wanted to remain friends, but she said no. She’s moving. Good thing for me, as I have no intention of giving up this apartment. And she has been talking about buying a house. Maybe this breakup will give her the incentive to finally do so.
Oh, I was hoping that was it! But I’m not expecting to be single again for at least thirty years.
Pardon me, I have to go kick some puppies. Good luck reconstructing everything, tdn.
swoon
I’m going to take you up on that. I’ll be 75 then, but that’s OK. Shall we meet at Sardi’s at around 4:30ish? I want to take advantage of the early bird special.
I’m so sorry for your hurt, tdn. Time will heal you! I wish you happiness in the future, and a smooth road getting there.
It’s a date! I’ll call you if we need to move it up. 
tdn, I know what you’re going through. I’ve been there, so I’ll offer you this bit of advice: Don’t compare a woman you’d like to date to a dung beetle. Most women find it a real turnoff.
I don’t see it as being an unflattering comparison … I recall reading somewhere that dung beetles mate for life. Sure wish I could cite that.
The fact that you’ve still got a spark for someone other than the girl you were with for so long is proof positive that you’re still a hot-blooded male, tdn. I’ll easily second everyone else’s input and say that you should put your ability to make the best out of things to good use by getting out there and living it up. Find an indirect way of broaching the subject of a night out with that girl since it seems obvious that a direct approach might make both of you uncomfortable. Does she know you were in such a long relationship that just ended also?
In that case, I retract my advice. tdn, when flirting make frequent reference to insects and poo. Make sure your potential honey knows that insects that live in (and on) poo mate for life, to get her to imagine a lifetime spent feasting on the undigested nutrients found other creatures’ turds. If that doesn’t get her in the mood, I don’t know what will.
Well, that’ll make sure he’s free to meet up with me in thirty years. :dubious:
tdn, I just want you to know it’s okay for you to see other people in the interval!
Sorry to hear this, tdn.
I had another whole paragraph typed out about not falling for the whole “Oh, I’ll just go and be a man-slut with as many hot college chicks as I can find” thing and then I remembered that, as someone who is NOT a hot college chick, I’d probably come off as sounding like I’m full of shit. So…knock yourself out. You certainly live in the right city.
Even when you’re the “bad guy” in the breakup, it sucks and hurts.
Or it could be that she was fine with it, seven and a half years ago. People change; that’s not dishonest.
tdn, by all means you must pursue this. You’re right, you will regret it forever if you don’t. That there is fear running thorugh you indicates that you’re on the right track here and I believe getting over these little fear hurdles will bring you to something spectacular! We all dream of spending our lives with The One with whom we shared that heart-stopping eye contact and for that opportunity to be staring you smack-dab between the eys – four years after the fact, no less – man, you’re not just doing it for yourself, but for all of us!!! This is the no-brainer of all no-brainers.
But you may have to get past that too-young-to-get-married thingy at some point. Maybe it will feel more right to do so this time around.
P.S. I once broke up with a girlfriend on Valentine’s Day. It does sound horrible now as I read this thread, but there was this feeling I just couldn’t shake that to be dishonest on a day that Hallmark went to such effort to create was just wrong.
We’re married now and have a 3-year-old. :eek:
:eek:
Who are you and what have you done with lorene?
I’m afraid I’ve been a bit remiss in thanking everyone personally for the well wishes. They all really do mean a lot.
Not yet. This was a long weekend, and I haven’t really spoken to anyone about anything yet. I did see her, though. She’s wearing that sweater. Oh my. Blood literally shot out of my eyeballs. Dayum. She looks better than she’s ever looked.
It could be that back then, she was still bitter about her divorce from a decade before, when she was married to a real prick. She wanted nothing to do with the whole institution.
Dude, I am now old enough to be the mother of a hot college chick, if I had started young. Or even started not that young. Man, how depressing.
Anyhow, I didn’t say that I had never been a hot college chick. I found a picture the other day of me at my college graduation and I looked far better than I ever gave myself credit for…
Youth really is wasted on the young.
Thanks for the implied compliment, though. And the opportunity to hijack.
You may have acquired your degree in the not-so-near past, but you have hardly given up your status as hot.
Yeah, you’re cute and all, but who’s the hottie with the vase on his head? 
I won’t pretend I have any relationship advice, but I’m sorry you’re going through a shitty time and here’s to coming out the other end.
George sits on a bench with Marisa Tomei. He’s mid-speech, and Marisa’s looking
interested, smiling and laughing.
GEORGE: …So, anyway, if you think about it, manure is not really that bad a word. I mean, it’s ‘newer’, which is good, and a ‘ma’ in front of it, which is also good. Ma-newer , right?
MARISA: (laughing) You’re so right. I never thought of it like that. Manure. ‘Ma’ and the ‘newer’.
Marisa laughs and George is smiling happily.
MARISA: Did you just make that up?
GEORGE: What, you think I’m doing material here?
MARISA: (laughs) No, no. It’s hard to believe anyone could be so spontaneously funny.
GEORGE: (modest) And I’m a little tired.
Marisa laughs again, then speaks, still smiling, but more seriously.
MARISA: So, tell me, how is it that a man like you, so bald, and so quirky and
funny, how is it you’re not taken?