Would other Relatives Call Us Gay?

Was on another thread called ‘‘Homosexual v Homoerotic’’ and if there is a difference or are they the same. I was told to come here where I would get a better answer. My problem is I have a male cousin who is the same age as me. We have always been very close. I find that I do have a sensual feeling for him and i’m almost positive he feels the same about me. When I greet the rest of my cousins it’s useally with a kiss for a female and a handshake for a male. With this cousin we both kiss each other on the cheek and sometimes on the lips even in front of all the other relatives. Even our handshake is very sensual. On occasion we had our picture taken together just the two of us. We would stand side by side and at first my hand would be on his shoulder and his hand would be on my shoulder. Then before the picture was snapped He would move his hand from my shoulder gently down my back and put his hand square on my ass. At the same time I would be doing the same thing stroking his back as my hand ends up square on his ass. We have never gone any further than that but this has happened at family events from weddings to funerals. We do it without even thinking in front of all of them. I’m wondering if the rest of the family notices and looks at this as a Homosexual act or a Homoerotic act when we are close to each other. I would very much like an opinion!


I don’t think anyone* really differentiates between “homoerotic” and “homosexual”. What you have is a cousin you haven’t banged…yet. And you’re probably making your other relatives very uncomfortable by getting grabby in their presence.

*In the way meaning any regular person. You can find a few people who will do anything, of course.

You paw your cousin at weddings? Ew.

…and funerals.

They’re thinking you two need to get a room. And find someplace other than family functions to play grab ass.

I think you should get your cousin alone and pose this question to him.
Work from there and see what happens.

Dude, gay.

Not only is it gay, but if you live in West Virginia, this would be the time to start shopping for a china pattern.

What if he yells ‘no homo’ while he does this?

Let’s put it this way, the only thing more gay than that would be Liberace playing backup piano to Judy Garland singing at the premier of Brokeback Mountain. Throw in a little incest and we have a real party on our hands.

Depends if homo is short for homosexual or homoerotic.

They probably would. I definitely would.


This kind of thing is sexual between two people of any gender/orientation. Since it’s between two people of the same sex, it is by definition homosexual. As for whether your family notices: even the blind ones have probably caught on by now.


Yes, his cousin is a cat.

Then it’s not homosexuality.

It is if it’s a boy cat!

I don’t know what your family would call it, but I’d call it flirtatious homosexual behavior.

There’s an argument that homosexual incestuous relations between consenting adult participants is less problematic in that it removes the “mutant baby” problem. Personally, however, it’s a level of squick too far for me and, I would guess, for most people, even if they didnt’ have problems with homosexuality in general. And it’s certainly likely to make family gatherings awkward.

I can’t stop you from exploring this relationship further with your cousin, but do be aware that your family are unlikely to be open-minded about it (unless you’ve got a really liberal family).

Nothin’ spells lovin’ like bein’ gay with your cousin’!