Why, I could play that with one eye closed.
Huh?
(Blinks all three eyes dumbly.)
Wha …?
I guess I just don’t get quadri-dexter jokes.
Well, if you want to be equal to everyone else, go buy a Red Ryder BB gun and shoot one of your eyes out, kid.
I love that movie.
No, four-armed is half an octopus.
Everyone in this thread except Pucky
Doperville, Earth,
Sent via: Via Certified Mail, Return Receipt Requested
Re: Cease and Desist Order
I write as attorney for Pucky Schumer, NATO (North American Tri-Ops), and TADL (TriOps Anti-Defemation League)).
As you are, no doubt, aware, much of the humor in this thread has been derogatory to triops, and, in particular, my clients.
My clients have been, through the long course of human history, discriminated against, ridiculed, libelled, defamed, and their rights have been infringed upon.
We have recently learned that this thread continues in that vein, and, as such, is subject to a multimillion dollar suit. Comparing us to certain bugs, hoping we cause our self harm with bb guns, and wishing electroshock therapy upon poor Pucky are all actionable actions, which we, and some of the Courts, take very seriously.
Based upon the foregoing, we hereby demand that your confirm to us in writing within ten days of receipt of this letter that:
(i) Every doper post a recantation and apology to Pucky;
(ii) This server keep bandwith available for the posting of Pro-Triops articles, such as “My Life with a Triop,” by Janet Moreisalwaysbetter, and “Eye, Eye, Eye Love You” the followup bestseller; photos, including of our Queen of the Three-Eyed Prom (where our theme was “Under the See, See, See.”) Helen TriKeller, and music by The Hieroglyphics, a rare Pro-Triops band;
(iii) Cecil write an article on the benefits of Triopicy.
The foregoing is without waiver of any and all rights of Pucky Schumer, NATO (North American Tri-Ops), and TADL (TriOps Anti-Defemation League), all of which are expressly reserved herein.
Very truly yours,
Martin ThriceSeer, Esq.
Pfeh! Thread-killer wannabe!
I have a confession. I’ve always thought that uni-orb women are hot. Why? I don’t know – maybe because of the “forbidden fruit” aspect of it.
I dated a one-eye girl in high school, but her parents made us break up. They were afraid that if we had kids, they’d have two eyes. (shudder.)
Way to go, Hamlet! Now that we’re organized, let’s start setting the record straight.
Two-eyed people are the ones who really should be ashamed.
Name one group that has done more to start wars, colonized the Third World and rape the environment. Who consumes 99% of the world’s resources? It’s those fricking binoculars, that’s who.
You owe me restitution.
And you know the group in the world to have the lowest crime rate, highest rate of recycling, YET still has to pay 150% more than normal people for LASIK surgery! Not to mention having our threads ignored because dopers want to hear about big dicks and virgins rather than an oppressed group like ourselves.
That’s right! Us Triops.
WE’RE WISE
WE BROUGHT PIES
IT’S BETTER WITH THREE EYES!!!
Viva la revolucion de tres ojos!
Tell it like it is.
They ignore us except when someone with three eyes commits a crime. You never see a headline saying “Two-eyed man robs goat farm.” But let a triop go on one measly little killing spree and that’s the first thing they mention.
Well sure, just ignore us and let our problems worsen. I tell you, it’s gonna be a long, hot summer.
I’m betting the OP is attracted to the three breasted woman in the bar in the movie Total Recall. Get her to dance and never miss a bit of the shakin’ goin’ on.
Aye caramba!
Face it, danceswithcats, guys like breasts. The more the merrier. Especially in odd multiples. Sorry, but those skinny chicks with just two don’t turn me on at all, and putting them on fashion runways is not going to change my mind. I like them big, round and not divisible by two.
Except for those big bubble fake ones. That’s a real turn-off.
[sub]But has anyone been with a woman with three implants? I have a friend who would like to know.[/sub]