What is your wife’s opinion of black neighborhoods? Is your opinion different from hers?
My parents bought our old house in a predominantly Jewish suburb in Massachusetts in the early 90s deliberately as a matter of fact. We had just moved from a really anti-immigrant/racist part of Quebec and I think they just wanted to know that the other people would be openminded. Also the public schools in said town are well-known to be among the top tier in MA and they didn’t want to have to pay for private schooling. There were a few Indians at that time but not many-they were buying houses in cheaper suburbs where they could get bigger homes. I was only one of two in my graduating class and there were a couple of half-Jewish/half-Indian kids. Now the town is stuffed to the brim with Indians, mainly b/c the Indian community in MA grew by leaps and bounds throughout the 90s…I still think there are more Jews but you definitely see tons of Indians around.
I don’t think it’s a matter of not wanting to move to a town full of Indians and Jews, though. The house prices there start at about 600K for a tiny little shack so it seems the population self-selects for those that can actually afford to move in.
Back in 1997, when we originally chose our house, the main ‘demographic’ we looked at was our neighbors ‘age’ as opposed to their skin color, religion or genital preference.
If pressed to estimate the racial composition of my area, I couldn’t come up with percentages, but would cede the fact it falls into what Ron Ruby describes as: ‘Whitelandia’
Out of curiosity, I used CityData.com to give me the breakdown of my neighborhood. Based on the Y2K census, I was suprised to see that my town, Seaford is even whiter than I assumed:
I’m wondering why “white community” isn’t among the list?
I grew up in a black neighborhood and turned out fine. So no, I wouldn’t have a problem with it.
I lived for 5 years in a very diverse apartment complex with a huge number of Russian immigrants, Central Americans, Indians, and Africans. I was a minority there, being monolingual and American. There was crime, but not anything worse than what you would expect from a low-income area. If I had a chance to move into another neighborhood of the same racial breakdown, I wouldn’t have a problem.
I now live in a predominately white hispanic (Cuban) area. Everyone is bilingual and friendly, so I have no complaints.
The only places I would have a problem living in would be those where my being a minority would make me an object of crime or discomfort. I can think of some ultra conservative places that might be like this, or small towns where “my kind” aren’t very populous
My wife equates black with poor. She sees our current neighborhood as a step to bigger and better things, for her that means a mostly white upper class neighborhood. But then she’s a product of West Oakland. She hadn’t traveled further than So Cal before we met. I don’t necessarily disagree that most of the black neighborhoods around these parts are also poor. However I’m of the belief that it’s the flight of people with higher incomes, which allow these neighborhoods to deteriorate.
Since I love my wife and would do anything for her, there’s of course going to have to be a compromise. Most likely, she’ll get her house and I’ll find myself doing more volunteer work of the sort (although my wife doesn’t like that much either) I’ve been trying to do lately.
Is this thread just meant for white people? And straight people? Because otherwise, it doesn’t make sense.
Black - no. I currently live in one (albeit a pretty bad one) and I want the hell out. Bad experiences make me shy away, sorry.
White/Asian/Gay - yes, no problem whatsoever.
It would seem to me it applies to everybody. A few Dopers may fit 2 of the 3 criteria (black, gay, asian) but I’ll wager you could count the ones who fit all three on one hand with multiple digits left over. I’m gay and I’m not offended at all by the title.
First, my experience leads me to believe most of the people here are white, and that most white people would have no problem living in a white community. Also, the reality of being in the minority typically means you don’t have the choice to surround yourself with members of your race/orientation on a daily basis. The number of Gay, Black, or Asian communities that fit the criteria a specific person would look for a few and far between. Thus, most realize living in a white community is something beyond their control.
Second, the title wasn’t meant to be all inclusive. If you are Black/Gay/Asian and wouldn’t live white community, I would love to hear that as well. I posed my question to gain an understanding of why housing situations are the way they are in the US. Sorry if that wasn’t clear.
No it’s for everybody. Besides, it would make sense the way you (wrongly) interpreted it because some (insert race) don’t want to live in (insert same race) communities.
We currently live in a neighborhood full of “old” people, but yes, we’d jump at the chance to live in one of the high end gay communities in Atlanta.
Asian neighbourhood - check, even nearly moved into a sharehouse mostly occupied by non-English speaking Malaysian students when I was in college.
Gay neighbourhood - been there, done that, loved it. Current neighbourhood skews queer friendly at least once you get to the central ‘downtown’ area of it.
And out here on the western edge of the neighbourhood we are a mixed race area and while it’s not a predominantly black population, it’s got a solid mix of black, white, asian and hispanic. I can’t see I’d have a problem moving into an area that was less diverse and skewed more toward a black population.
I’m used to hearing a lot of different languages spoken around me and having different cultural activities going on in my neighbourhood. I’m also pretty hard to get interested in crime statistics (though our current community is very, very safe.) I just want to live somewhere interesting. It makes me happy that in spite of our surprising shot up into the bourgeoisie thanks to my unexpected career successes, we’re still living among a mix of working class, middle class, and starving students. Class tends to be the factor that I pay more attention to than race or sexuality. I was terribly uncomfortable living in an entirely middle class suburb- I had enough irrational left-wing suburbphobia drummed into me as a kid that I felt like a class traitor even though we’re pretty irredeemably lodged in the middle class right now! Attitudes learned in childhood are definitely hard to shake!
Am Caucasian, mostly lived in white middle class 'hoods and could not get out fast enough. Maybe that is because we traveled a lot and I knew there was another world out there.
Before reaching 22 I’d spent time in the Salinas hills, the Tenderloin of San Francisco, and the Peoples’ Republic of Boulder, Colorado.
Our little neighborhood is interesting: I am a WASP, husband is Jewish and the makeup of our immediate surroundings is mostly white but not without some diversity: some gay, some black, Indian, Asian, Jewish, old, young, with kids, child-free.
However, as with Anu-1979’s Massachussetts spot, you have to have a bit of money to ‘get in’–even to rent here.
Agree with Idlewild that I just want to live somewhere interesting. I actually am more preoccupied with moving away from winter than anything else, but the husband worries that when we retire we might possibly be among ‘too many old people.’
White guy here.
For a short while I lived in an apartment. I picked the place purely on what I could afford since, at that time, I had a low paying job and bad credit.
My neighbors were predominantly Mexican. I had no problems with them, except that they liked to play traditional Mexican music, very loud. That could get annoying, but I had no problems otherwise.
If my wife and I had to move today, since it wouldn’t be to a big city, I doubt we would run across any gay neighborhoods.
As for a predominantly minority neighborhood, as long as it was a place where I didn’t feel that the current residents had a problem with a couple of white people moving in, I don’t think there’d be a problem.
My husband and I are both white, and just bought a house in a town that’s about 80% black. It’s a middle-class suburb of Atlanta, which is at or near the top of American cities in the number of affluent blacks, so a lot of the black neighborhoods are regular ol’ suburban neighborhoods rather than ghettoes. It looks remarkably like Fairfax County, VA, where I grew up, except that the majority of faces I see are black rather than white. No big deal.
I’ve lived in a neighborhood where being straight and white put me very much in the minority. It never bothered me then and it wouldn’t bother me now.
Predominantly gay–you bet! We’re straight, childfree, and quiet, and most of the gay folks we know are very cool. Plus I’ve heard from lots of sources that gay areas generally have high property values.
Asian? That’s pretty much where we live now–a big percentage of the folks in our neighborhood are Asian, and we’ve found them to be great neighbors–they’re quiet, they keep their houses up nicely, and they’re friendly but not overly so (we’re pleasant but prefer to keep to ourselves rather than doing the “neighborhood buddies” thing–our nearby neighbors seem to have the same preference).
Black? It would depend. Nice quiet middle-class black neighborhood, sure, no problem. The only potential thing I’d be concerned with is the kids and their friends, since it seems like at least around where I live, black teens like to listen to loud rap music and I just don’t care for it. Even then, though, as long as the kids were nice and friendly too, it wouldn’t be a problem. I try to look at everybody as an individual rather than a group member, but when you’re buying a house you can’t interview your potential neighbors so you have to go at least a little bit by perception.
Our neighborhood is a nice mix of White, Asian, Black, and Hispanic, and so far we’ve been very happy there. We’d like to move, but only because we’d like a bigger place–but with property values in the Bay Area the way they are, that’s probably not going to happen soon.
Well, I live in a predominantly black neighborhood now, so I guess the answer to that one is “yes”.
When I was living in Japan I was in an Asian neighborhood (quite a few Koreans and Filipinas, actually), so that’s a “yes” as well.
Haven’t lived in a gay neighborhoods, but I certainly would be willing to.
The neighborhood we live in is very diverse already, whites, blacks, asians,and hispanics are all well represented. It is also pretty diverse w/regard to age.
Would I move into a neighborhood that was pretty homogenously asian/black/hispanic/something else, leaving my family to be the only “white”(we’re actually white/native american, but that is not apparent to the casual observer) family on the block?
Well, to be honest, it wouldn’t be my first choice. Just would like to feel like I fit in, wouldn’t be ostracized, and especially that my kids wouldn’t be ostracized in school.
If the schools were good and the neighborhood was safe and the house was comfortable, I would certainly be willing to give it a try. If the neighbors were friendly and my kids had no trouble making friends in school, then great!
I would prefer to live in a neighborhood with other children for mine to play with, so I don’t know if that would rule out a gay neighborhood. I don’t care if my kids’ playmates have two mommies or two daddies. For this reason, I wouldn’t care to live in a predominantly aged neighborhood.
Can’t remember where, but I recall an interview with Jerry Seinfeld and he mentioned living in West Hollywood and the interviewer made some sort of subtle comment/inuendo about it being Gay and Seinfeld went off - said how he thought it was the best neighborhood in LA and never had a problem with it…so now whenever I see that episode where Gay = “…not that that’s a problem”, I have to laugh and wonder if that phrase sprung up from that interview.
I have lived in three Gay neighborhoods and the straights I met all were quite happy to be there - especially single women felt safer walking the streets or coming home alone late at night.
I lived in the Korean Town section of LA for about 2 years and had no problem - nice people, great restaurants, well-kept yards and homes… although I have to admit, my experience there led me to believe Koreans are perhaps not the best drivers in the world, but other than that…
Never lived in an all black area, but have had friends who did and for the most part, those were crappy inner city areas that had less to do with black neighbors than simply being a druggie/hooker area with cheap rent - hence my cheap friends lived there. I would not have moved to those areas for anything.
But I lived in an apartment building on the way upper west side of NYC that was about 40% black and had only one problem - the white, redneck super who was always trying to stir up trouble between the black and white residents. Luckily, no matter what race you were, you figured him out quickly and nobody paid attention to him.
I agree with the idea of driving through the neighborhood on a late Friday or Saturday night and see what is happening. That would be more important than Black/Asian/Gay.