Got to talking, she got out of a 3 year relationship a year ago due to her exes pot use
I am not too far removed from an 8 year relationship
Said she went down a “slut spiral” (actual words) after her relationship ended
Swears she has been checked and is clean
We went on 6 subsequent dates
Most sexual girl I’ve ever been with (2-3 times a day every time we’re together, her initiation the majority of the time)
She asked me to be exclusive 4 days ago, I said yes
Now 4 days later, thinking I made the wrong decision because I keep thinking about her “spiral”
Besides her comment about her “spiral”, we’ve clicked great. She even cooked me a weeks worth of food as a surprise because I live by myself and live off of rotisserie chicken from the grocery store. She gets along great with my friends.
I’m very torn right now; my mind is telling me I should back off of her though.
If you like having sex 2 or 3 times a day then you can satiate her appetite and I don’t think there’s any problem.
A lot of girls go through a “slut spiral” after getting out of an 8-year relationship. That’s a very long time to only sleep with one person and she was probably trying to make up for lost time.
All in all, a girl who admits to a moral failing in her past is seeking to build trust through honesty. That’s a very positive thing, in my opinion, and not an inherent deal-breaker.
Ultimately, it just comes down to whether you enjoy your time with her and want to pursue the relationship.
Before everyone jumps self-congratulatory in your shit for being judgemental, just go ahead and roll with what’s eating you, and consider what you’ll regret worse:
A. Worse case scenario: she cheats on you, or dumps you because she can’t do exclusivity after all.
My mistake, it was a 3-year relationship for her, which is still a long time.
Something to consider: pot can make guys lose interest in sex. Happened to me in my heyday and I know it annoyed my girlfriend that I was choosing cannabis over her vagina. It’s entirely possible her ex was neglecting her sexual needs and that’s why she went overboard sleeping with dudes after her relationship ended.
What the heck is wrong with a woman who enjoys, and engages in a lot of sex? As long as she’s practicing safe sex and is honest in her relationships with others, I don’t see a problem.
QtM FTW!
Why is it if a guy sleeps around he’s a stud but if a girl sleeps around she’s a slut?
Christ, she likes sex, likes you, can cook, is honest. The only way this could be better would be if she owned a liquor store.
…from a movie from before you were born called “Parenthood”:
Grandma: You know, when I was nineteen, Grandpa took me on a roller coaster.
Gil: Oh?
Grandma: Up, down, up, down. Oh, what a ride!
Gil: What a great story.
Grandma: I always wanted to go again. You know, it was just so interesting to me that a ride could make me so frightened, so scared, so sick, so excited, and so thrilled all together!
Some didn’t like it. They went on the merry-go-round. That just goes around. Nothing. I like the roller coaster. You get more out of it.
She waited until the 5th date to have sex .That tells me that she didn’t just go out with you for sex, she wants to build something. She was honest with you about her “reawakening” after her breakup. That is a plus. She cares enough about her health to be tested. Another plus. She was in a 3 year relationship, so you know she has no commitment issues. Another plus. She cares enough about you to make sure you eat something other than chicken every night. Another plus. Your friends like her, and they might know you better than you know yourself. If they think she’s good for you, then that’s a big plus.
Add the fact that you like spending time with her, and I think she sounds great. Unless, you still like smoking pot.
To be clear, other than “I have been tested for STDs and here are the results,” I don’t think she owes you any explanation or information about her sex life prior to the point at which you two became exclusive.
I suggest sticking with the relationship. Poor lady was likely wound up with sexual tension after several years with a pothead.
MY dick tends to get sore after a while if I date a woman who wants sex 3 times a day - 7 days a week - including during menstruation. The chafing soreness goes away if I rest a bit for a few days. Other than that, the sexually eager ladies can be great fun.
Just bumping this thread again to say thanks for all the great input. It’s still early in the relationship, but this is one of the rare times I actually thought all advice was solid, especially the quoted text.
You met on Tinder but she didn’t give it up until the fifth date? Doesn’t that defeat the purpose of Tinder? I thought Tinder was used for hookups with no strings attached?
But anyway. I see no issues staying with this girl. I think you have some insecurities you might want to work on though.
Glad you stayed with her. Even if things don’t work out for the long haul, you’ll always fondly remember that time when you were having sex 2-3 times a day.
So she went through a phase after her 3-year relationship ended, where she had sex with a lot of guys in a short time. Good for her. Main thing is, she’s having sex exclusively with you now. Life is good.
Until you get hospitalized for exhaustion, of course, but even then it will have been worth it.
Seriously, it is she who is calling it a slutty time, not anyone else. It is about how she feels about her own behavior. So obviously she feels uncomfortable for that time period. She is talking about it to the OP and labeling it that because she wants to move away from that behavior.
