I’ll keep this MPSIMS, not Pit. Sorry if this is in the wrong forum, mods.
To the topic. I’m a nice guy. And yes, it’s true, nice guys finish last. At least we do at this age in time, and teenage years especially. Please don’t go telling me that I’m too young to worry about relationships etc. Sorry, just the way I am.
As I was saying. It seems that all the guys who are complete jerks (there is more appropiate terminology, but this is MPSIMS) and, as it seems, “sex in pants”, get the girls. And if they don’t have that girl, the girl will be attached to them way too much. Pretty typical.
And also, if you’re one of those people who doesn’t want to do stuff right away (you known what I’m talking about. And yes, there are people quite young engaging in this stuff), you’re automatically thought of as prude and shunned. Seems you can’t want to wait until marriage to do that stuff anymore. I’m staightedge and it’s the way I intend to stay.
Now I’m not complaining about the fact I want to do that stuff, but that’s all a relationship is these days. There’s nothing that doesn’t immediately rely on physical stuff. I guess I’ve got old standards or something. So there’s no room for people who respect people for they’re mind and and want some special feelings there.
I sypathize with you. I lend people money when they need it, of course they say they’ll pay me back. I never got anything in return, nor do I expect it. Infact I’m down to my last $10.05 in the bank! When it comes to me asking someone else for something they’ll just tell me to go and screw myself. I still lend that same person money if they need it, I don’t think any different of those people. Most of the men and women I know consider me the nicest person they’ve met. On the otherhand they think I’m nice just to get into girl’s pants, it’s quite false (I gotta admit, sometimes I am) but 99% it’s just cause I’m a nice guy. Oh well, pretty soon we’ll be a rare breed. Being nice nowdays will kill ya!
Ah, there’s another one of me, thanks d12. I’d be a bit more careful with my cash though. But I hardly have any, so no one asks me anyways.
And yes, I did finsh the trebuchet, but then I broke it. Too much counterweight for the poor wood to handle. The supports snapped. Literally. The farthest I got was about 25 feet with 25 pounds of counter weight (launching apples).
I try to be careful with my money, but being a teen doesn’t help much. New clothes here, movies there, dinner too. I’m not just nice moneywise, I open the doors for people, hold them while other people I don’t know hop through, let the ladies go first. In general, I put other people before me. It’s something that will one day come back to haunt me.
If it makes you feel any better,(your name here), I am generally an all-round nasty piece of work, and happy to do stuff right away, and it is often quite a struggle meeting nice birds.
Especially girls who won’t get way too attached to me.
Well, I’m not a “nice guy”(yes, they do finish last), or a bad boy(yes, they do score more often than not), but rather, I’m a Dickhead( shunned by most).
Cuz our girlfriends cum first!
I’m sure you’ll find a nice mature lady soon enough and those relationships tend to work out alot better than the relationships that are centered around “stuff.” It seems to me that most girls go through a “bad boy” stage and then they wake up. So just keep up the nice guy work and they’ll come around.
I used to think much the same of myself and lament my situation. Until I realized the only really nice guys who end up getting the women in the end are the ones who don’t think that they are “the nice guy”. Now I simply think of myself as any other schmuck with all those little things that make me unique.
I’m a nice guy and have the battle scars to prove it! Been there and done all that, probably more times than you have. I’m owed a fortune unrepaid loans that I’ll never be able to collect, been used and abused. I’ve gotten the girl only to loose her to a jerk who is not a nice guy, or to liars or nasty bastards. A few came wandering back after they got abused and expected me to fix them and I did and they went off with another nasty bastard as soon as they could.
I’m the good neighbor who keeps my noises low but my neighbor plays his damn rap music so loud it makes my windows rattle. I’m the renter who fixes up my place at my cost and then the landlord throws me out as soon as I fall behind in the rent. I’m the excellent listener with broad shoulders to cry on who sits alone when I need someone to talk to and the maker of soup to take to the ill but who suffers alone when I am sick.
I’m too understanding for my own good and always try to see the other side of things. I’m the guy girls are always looking for but who is ignored when they find me. I feed the hungry only to have them spend their saved money on drugs or luxuries. I am reasonably honest only to be stolen from. I care about, only to not be cared about. I don’t cheat, only to be cheated on. I extend the hand of friendship only to be used.
Girls dreamily wonder why I’m not married and then they run off with a troglodyte. It get them off of drugs only to have them meet someone who gets them on drugs again. I help them out of depression only to be ignored when I get depressed.
I’m the universal nice guy, who is always alone these days, and broke.
Im not a nice guy, and I get plenty of chicks! hehe. Seriously, its not so much about being an asshole, its about being indifferent to the girl. They get so much attention, that you get their attention when you dont give em any.
Well, maybe you aren’t all that nice. Are you nice to all the girls, or just the pretty ones who won’t date you?
Is nice all you can really say about yourself? Howabout interesting, or smart, or passionate, or adventurous, or well-read, or strong, or decent, or funny?
“Nice” is sort of a bland, non-descriptor.
Lending money to friends who abuse the privilege and remaining “nice” to people who walk all over you and treat you like crap isn’t something I’d brag about. It tells readers that “I have no backbone.” Sticking up for yourself and saying “no” doesn’t make you a bad guy. In the right doses, it makes you a guy people can respect. Who respects someone that they can walk all over time and time again?
I’m sure you are all fine, decent guys. But the bitter, sort of put-upon way you talk about what a “nice guy” you are isn’t going to win friends and influence people. It’s almost designed to make people take pity on you. “No one likes me because I’m just too nice.” Pity isn’t attractive.
Confidential to (your name here) - You sound very young, so forgive me if you are really 30 years old and I’m talking to you like a 16 year old. You sound like you have your priorities straight about sex and what you are ready for and what you aren’t. I guarantee that there are other young women in your school or in your community who are also unsure about sex and who feel like everyone around them is moving too fast. So find them! Date them! Have honest conversations about what you are ready for! Move nice and slow!
Paxil30 et al. Not every girl is attracted to jerks who mistreat us or who are only after sex. You are just attracted to those broken angels in need of a rescuer. Maybe it’s you who needs to change - in terms of the kinds of women you’ll go after, in terms of how you let people treat you. Stand up for yourself, man!
Finally, women like guys, nice or otherwise, who make us feel sexy and attractive and wanted. We like guys who will make a move on us already, instead of dithering about whether wanting a date or a kiss or sex will compromise their “nice guy” image. THAT’S why it seems like the jerks get the girls - the jerks are confident enough to reach for a kiss or ask for a dance.
I’m not going to be able to say it better than Magdalene, but I’ve seen this thread a lot here and I’ve never contibuted my view-
I’ve dated a lot of “nice” guys who have been Boring. They’ll do anything at all to please me and they seem to have no opinions of their own. That is so unattractive.
What I like about a guy is a strong personality, someone who is different from most of humanity and has his own passions and interests- someone I can learn from.
I’ve dated a few jerks in my time but as I’ve gotten older my jerk detector has become more accurate and I can avoid these types.
I’m also repelled by “Nice” guys who seem to have no personality.
But there does exist something in between, a guy who will treat me like a lady yet is his own person and fascinates me.
(Your name here): I agree with Magdalene, confidence is key. Take it from a guy who used to be the universal “nice” guy: CONFIDENCE is KEY! Repeate that to youself. Ok. Again. Good.
You can be a nice guy and still radiate confidence. Like the man said in Fast Times At Ridgemont High “You just gotta put out the vibe!” I asked my girlfriend what drew her to me and she said that it was the way I walked, like I was a badass. Now I have to admit that I am pretty badass, but it’s all in the vibe.
I’ve found that the times that I find someone are the times I’m not really looking. Eventually if you are patient and stop bitching about being a “nice guy” the right girl will show up. Mine hunted me down, and i hope your’s will too.
As for d12, you are pretty much bragging about being a tool and a door mat. You can’t go on like that because even though you say that you don’t expect the money back, you do. And it’s going to turn into a whole lot of resentment, <South Park ski instructer> and you aren’t going to have a good time.</South Park ski instructer>
Well, I’m glad someone agrees with me. Like Turpentine, I’ve seen this thread a great deal here - the “poor me, I’m such a nice guy and I can’t get a girlfriend.”
It’s akin to the women who whine (upon rejection) “He couldn’t handle such a strong, intelligent, independent woman.” Sure, yeah, uh-huh - THAT’S why he dumped you. :rolleyes:
Kindness, warmth, humor, respect, and generosity are all wonderful qualities and they count a long way in forming attachments. Notice how many more adjectives than “nice” there were in that sentence.
Whining is about the least attractive quality ever.
I think that’s kind of harsh. The OPer said he was a young guy, and he’s obviously forming these opinions from an immature perspective, like most young people do. I would say, from that perspective though, he’s got a point. Sex is overemphasized to young people quit a bit these days, and it leads to maladjusted adults. It took me until my mid-20’s to figure out there’s more to knowing a woman than fucking her. It shouldn’t take that long, but a lot of the time I think I’m AHEAD of my peers.
